Elopements and wedding receptions?

I agree with you that this delayed "reception" is really a gift grab. I am amazed at the number of people who try to have a second wedding or a wedding redo. A wedding is for single people, and once you are married, you become husband and wife. Pretending to be a bride and groom with a wedding reenactment after that is very tacky and quite sad. I would not go to this sham wedding, far less buy a gift.

If someone told me I was not wanted at the ceremony, I would not go to a reenactment+ reception over the summer.

I have gone to weddings where the couple hadn't known eachother long and I had a bad inkling that it wouldn't work out. I gifted them just as I would anyone else. I was happy to share their wedding day with them & celebrated as though nothing was off about the whole thing.

I have attended receptions where the couple eloped and held a party upon their return (it was casual, bbq/picnic, and not a "gift grab", nor was there any reenactment).

My issue with your family member is that they have said you are not wanted there.

What she is planning is beyond gauche. Whatever she is staging in the summer, it will not be a reenactment of her wedding. She will already be married, and she can't get any "more" married. It will be a blatant gift-grab. Nothing is more tacky than married women trying to do a fake redo of their weddings just because they can't get over their entitlement-minded princess fantasies. I wouldn't attend or send a gift if I were you.

Is it necessary to go to any family event? Is it necessary to go to any wedding? YOU, the guest, should never go to a party (or any event) that will make you feel unhappy or uncomfortable or angry.

And, if attending this party several months after the ceremony will make you uncomfortable then just decline the invitation. Just send her a congratulatory card and wish her the best!

Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant

You are right. You were not good enough to come to the real wedding but you are good enough to come to this tacky party and bring her money and gifts? Oh Yeah, I'm running to do that. I would not go and I would not get her a thing. She didn't want anyone at her wedding so be it. No one should go to this shame of a recpetiona and certainly no one should give this greedy Gerty a single thing. The pure nerve of some people.

there's no law you have to attend. I wouldn't if I were you. if someone comes out and says they don't want you at their ceremony, then why would you buy them a gift later. I would understand if they were very shy people and wanted a private wedding, but this is in your face rude.

If this is a close family member, I would still be there for her even though I may not agree with what she is doing or the choices she is making. If you feel like this is a big grab bag party, then just get her something cheap. No need to spend $100-200 on a gift from their registry if you don't think they're deserving of it. Go with something $20 or under. 3 months is extremely sudden to decide to spend eternity with a person.

Wow!

You can gently suggest all you want but this woman is clueless.

I would skip the big gift grab, not a problem.

I absolutely refuse to attend one more fake do-over re enactment wedding show. They are stupid and totally emotionless, not to mention a mockery of the sanctity of an actual wedding ceremony.

I would not go. But it has nothing to do with her whirlwind, sweep me off my feet; I wanna get married to someone I have known for only 12 weeks joke.

After she returns from her elopement, send her a card of congratulations then, be done with it.

Personally, I would politely decline the invitation. I agree with you 100%, gift grab! I disagree with anyone who throws a big party after getting married in secret or in a destination wedding. That's like saying "You people aren't important enough to witness our vows but we totally want your gifts!" UGH!

Good luck!