Are these issues or not?

he must have self issues about his appearance an feel you are to beautiful for him, or maybe not to confident about his manhood. Let it go for a while but make him feel like he is the one

I'm sorry to say that because these questions are weighing on your mind enough for you to even be asking advice, then they clearly are issues (but I think deep down inside, you know that already, don't you?).

Taking one question at a time; I think the fact that you're only 3 months in to your lovely relationship and you're already feeling sexually unfulfiled is not promising. Unless the guy involved has ED issues, this is supposed to be the "honeymoon" period of a relationship; and if you're not sexually fulfilled at this point, I don't think there's much hope of things improving unless you have a frank discussion with him about this aspect. It's too big a one to ignore - I think a great many affairs start because one partner feels sexually unfulfilled. I'm not suggesting for one moment that you would have an affair; but could you see yourself 5 years down the line in a relationship where the sex had diminished even further, and being happy with that?

Secondly; I am also concerned about his attitude towards the child he may have fathered. Why isn't he in any hurry to prove (one way or the other) that he is or is not the father? If he is the father, then it would strike me as being very callous that he has no intention of having any emotional relationship with the child (regardless of his feelings for the child's mother); and he probably feels he should not pay any child support as well (especially as he's in "no hurry" to establish paternity). These two issues ring loud warning bells for me; especially as you state that things have happened quickly between you two. Yes, I agree at 39 and 42 you know the ins and outs of relationships, but I also think you know that things rarely happen so quickly in mature relationships, so again, if you're having concerns about things at this point, I would take a step back and just have a long look at the situation before going any further.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do, and I hope you get these things sorted out.

Certainly talk to him, be supportive of any baggage he still carries, in a non pressuring way, without judging, and let him open about them.

Silly is an issue for you as well within the context of not feeling sexually fulfilled, even to the point of being rejected. That needs to be discussed. The rejection (you say fast pace) might be he would like to as much be in control of the pace, fear initiating sex through baggage, doubts, lingering guilt he denies, while attaching some of his stuff to this new relationship. I advise taking this in baby steps, and if you can't accept his pace, then question that as well.

Given your respective ages I can relate at age 42, and we always wonder, no matter how stable the relationship is. You might ask him what he wants from a relationship, what does he expect or anticipate, hopefully friendship, which may sound weak, but it is a best foundation.

It seems he has already shared more info with you than he truly needed to, but that may have been testing you, or a self test? If it was me in your place, I'd question myself about sexual fulfillment, as the basis for a relationship, without adding so many other ingredients to the mix.

I think the longer you leave this issue unresloved, the worse it will become. You need to talk to your partner and try and figure out if this realtionship will still work even if your sexual needs are different. The possiblility of him being a father to someone elses baby is bound to also play on your mind as theres always the chance of the mother (or child when old enough) wanting your fella to be a part of its life at some point. I really think he does need to find out for sure if it is his baby tho, even if he doesn't want to be part of its life. Hope that helps :0)

I think the physical side of things may have something to do with his age but that ain't the issue. I think that you have to look at this man closely, This man maybe the father of a young child and if he is will not have anything to do with because he has no feelings for the mother. In my view he his not a man, not willing to stand up to the consequences of his action. It takes a man to be a father.

Well, talk about it. There is something wrong in here, see if he is leading a double life.