Why haven't I been raptured yet?

Actually, it's tomorrow and you have to wait until the global earthquake that is a 10+ on the Richter scale. It will happen at 6 PM your local time. I'll let everyone know when my family calls from Norway and lets me know they just had a massive earthquake and the last two Christians on the entire peninsula have mysteriously vanished, leaving nothing but a pile of clothing in the snow. My family is 9 hours ahead of the west coast of the US, so we'll have plenty of time to go get baptized and whatnot if necessary.

Yes, do sit outside. You don't want to bump your head on the ceiling while Jesus is trying to lift you into the clouds. Also, bring booze. I have a feeling Hebrew heaven is a dry county and you'll not be able to get any once you're there. You should be good on food if you're into manna though. I'd pack some chocolate, just in case.

I'm betting you didn't think of these yesterday because you were preoccupied with stupid crap you won't need after you're raptured. Like work. Or school. Shame on you trading your ability to point and laugh at those left behind for money or good grades! You should have been preparing for the rapture and packing your "go bag" full of candy, booze, cigarettes and porn. Those will be valuable commodities in Hebrew heaven, you know.

because of the fact human beings have forgotten the thank you to precise spell and punctuate. God gets teed off whilst human beings won't be able to differentiate between a possessive pronoun and a contraction, she's ill of persons writing "payed" for "paid", and he or she wonders whilst human beings began spelling "actual" with an "a" and "ridiculous" with an "e". And the guy who reported the rapture might ensue final week and now insists that it develop right into a "quiet" rapture and that the international rather will end October 21 is a freaking CON ARTISTwho has made comparable predictions until now and been incorrect until now. If everybody claims the rapture is coming and asks for money, he's a con artist.

Wait for 6 pm

In the coming 24 hours this will be the prevailing question on yahoo answers :-)

Wait for 6pm. At least take comfort in the fact that if YOU die, you've given the rest of us fair warning.

Is it already 6 pm on May 21 where you are?

Oh.

Yeah...Harold Camping and his family radio freaks are a bunch of nuts.

You got the date wrong...it is SUPPOSED to happen tomorrow. However, if you have not asked Jesus Christ to come into your heart and save you, you will not be going in the rapture. It's only for TRUE Christians.

i would probably bring playboy, and i would start jumping and waving my hands like a flamingo.Jesus will surely come then.good luck.

maybe its because you sinned recently and you forgot to ask for forgiveness, all is calm, and have some fun :D

wait for 6pm