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Females only : My wife is very nice, and we enjoy intimacy. But she does not want to live with me. Why?

Update:

She said I haven't done anything wrong either. She just wants to live by herself for some reason.

17 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I know of a married couple that once lived separately. It was because the man still wanted to have his "space" and have an escape from her and their marriage., he wasn't emotionally mature to be married in the first place. She eventually got tired of it, and filed for divorce. Upon realizing he was about to lose her, he moved in immediately and they haven't had problems since.

    Basically, your wife is doing the same thing. The point of being married is to live together, share together, and bond; call me old fashioned but you're not supposed to have two separate places to live.If it doesn't bother you, than by all means continue living that way. But if it does, have a talk with her. It's not normal, and you deserve to have her live with you.

  • Sophia
    Lv 4
    9 years ago

    That's very odd. First time I hear something like this.

    What does she say when you ask her the reason? There might be plenty of reasons:

    1. She married you for something like a green card, or she's a lesbian but wants to hide it for some reason and you're her cover towards family, society...etc

    2. She has some psychological problems. Some people feel trapped when they live with anyone. Even with people they love very much. Or she's too use to living alone that she's scared if you guys lived alone, that would end your relationship because she thinks you would get bored from her or vice versa.

    3. What does she do for a living? Some people who needs to be creative like writers, artists, actors, designers...wants to be alone so they could focus on their work. Maybe she's a little workaholic.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    To be honest, it most likely is not you. My husband and I actually lived apart for our first two years of marriage. This was due to our separate graduate/medical schools, but at the same time, it afforded us (me specifically) independence. Some people need privacy, almost isolation, from others, even those they love. On the other hand, there may be cause to worry. Do you spend nights together occasionally? Long periods of time/weekends together? If not, that might be a red flag. If you've never been to her place, or she overnight to yours, I might push the issue until you get a straight answer. Good luck!

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    She may like that boyfreind girlfriend type of connection, you know, you have your own space but you go over each other's houses whenever you want to spend time with each other which isn't a bad idea at all.

    Believe it or not, I've given this some thought and sometimes I wonder how would my future husband feel if the both of us had our own place...I think it's cool so long as we value our relationship and stay loyal to each other in the name of God.

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  • 9 years ago

    I've heard that married couples living seperately is a new trend. Sometimes it's just seperate beds, seperate rooms, or entirely different apartments but they're across the hall from each other. They get their space both emotionally & physically; they don't get tired of each other.

  • amel
    Lv 5
    9 years ago

    she may need to spend sometime by herself, to reconsider her situation and think peacefully away from your influential presence... that's normal, and any relationship goes through some coldness... so give her time by herself, and let she tell you when she is ready to be back.

    and, the period she spends away, just hang on to say how r u, do u need any thing?, but don't inquire about her being ready to be back or not, let it be her own decision.

    wish u tawfiq, in shaa Allah

  • It sounds neuropsychological. She probably is in touch with her hormones and she rather be physically apart from you rather than. . .

    be happy

    be safe

    be challenged

    be rattled

    or anything else that doesn't really make sense but to her is an option to try. Maybe propose a couple of things that might get her optimistic.

  • 9 years ago

    Woman like their own space. There may be nothing at all wrong with your relationship, she just wants her own space.

    My husband and I both have separate rooms. I love and adore him, we are inseparable and he is the only person that I want.

    I just don't like living too close to him. I like my own space mainly because I have my own little preferences about things.

    Like, he snores. When we're sleeping, its nice to cuddle but then he wakes me up by snoring in my ear, which pisses me off. There are also little living habits that he has that I don't like in my space. I don't hate him for it and it doesn't affect our relationship but he likes things the way he likes them and I like things the way I like them...we don't like things the same way so we don't share rooms.

    Of course he sleeps in my room or I sleep in his 5 of 7 days but I just like my own space.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Agree with the majority here, she may just like her independence some people are just like that.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Maybe it has nothing to do with you at all.

    It's a long life if we are lucky.

    She may just need some time to herself.

    That or she's boning the FedEx guy.

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