Why does my daughters dad (my ex) try to guilt trip me and make me feel like a bad mum?

You know he's a game-player so you know this is a game he's playing because YOU allow him to get to you. How nice for him to still be able to control you despite your marrying someone else. You got into a habit of believing what he said about you when you were with him. This destroyed your self esteem. WHAT makes him king of the hill, the man who gets EVERYTHING right, whose opinion of you and the world is ALWAYS correct? Your natural good sense tells you that he's basically a nasty piece of work.....so don't keep falling into the habit of believing what he says. Now some other poor woman is stuck with him and is no doubt getting the treatment you used to get and managed to escape. You have a nice new husband and a lovely daughter. I suggest you ignore your ex's taunts, take him to Court to get the money you need and which he has welched on for 7 years (silly you for allowing him to get away with it for so long....and hopefully he will have to give you some back pay). And then forget him. He'll be upset and no doubt horrible about it all - but he's horrible to you already so that's nothing new is it. What does your husband say about it all? He and you both know you are a good mother. Your daughter's happy. The only one who isn't happy is your ex because he can't get his own way. He can only try controlling you still by going over the same old ground of trying to undermine your self esteem. Stop letting him do that and take him to Court. So what if he gets less cash to spend on baby no.2? Wife no.2 will probably dump him as you did in the past and you should be looking after yourself, your husband and your daughter. This guy is history. OK, he's your daughter's dad and you shouldn't run him down to her. Let her make up her own mind about him as she grows up. Just make sure she gets loads of love and attention from you and her step-dad. Good luck.

You know he's being ridiculous, so stop falling for the mind games.

And if he's talking about stopping payments, just contact your solicitor/lawyer, tell them and make sure the arrangements are in place payments to have to take place through the court system.

By all means go through the courts, don't even warn him you're doing this. Just do it. Once you start playing hard ball, the petty mind games will stop.

Go and get regularly scheduled payments and visitation, so that he can not deny his responsibilities.

next time he tells you that youa re a bad mother, tell him that he would not know what being a father was like, because he does not even spend enough time with his daughter to find out. Tell himt hat you ar not going to put up with his verbal abuse any longer. (Do not tell him that you are filing for child support and such. let him find out when they notify him.) Do not call him if he does not pick up his child. Just keep a journal of everything he does and does not do, so that you will have proof of his actions, if you need it.

Want to know how to get your ex back? Change yourself. Don't worry about changing other people, worry about changing yourself. Go to https://tr.im/YWAdd

Once you do that then you can start to worry about getting back together with your ex, other wise you will find that you are fighting about all the same things and getting no where. Do what it takes and I promise things will work out in your favor.

The funny thing is I came to the realization that I had to change a little too late. After I was kicked out and after I was about to lose the only things that truly mattered to me - her love. A funny thing happens when we truly love someone and lose them. We do what ever it takes to get them back. For me I had to drop bad habits that had caused not only our relationship to sour but practically every other relationship I had had in the past. Not only with women, but with friends, co-workers, family, you name it.

Which is why I say to you as my ex at the time said to me, the only thing you can do is change yourself. Work on yourself and improve on the person that you already are. Drop the negative things in your life that don't belong there and you will see all of your relationships start to take off to new heights.

Apologies for my rudeness but it's easier to get the point across this way, hurrrrrrrr durrrrrrrr > i married an a**hole who likes to play mind games, and be cheap, divorced him, now he wants to stick me with the child we had, and stop helping support it.

He is control freak. he will never change for you