What can be done about the current state of affairs in Red Wing, Minnesota?

These items from The Red Wing Republican Eagle (what kind of name for a newspaper is that ????) clearly show that the place is a den of iniquity :

The city of Red Wing reported Aug. 22 that a marble bench in John Rich Park had been damaged sometime during the night of Aug. 20. Police said the bench seat was tipped off onto the ground and broke.

The Red Wing police are looking for the owner of a dog that bit someone on Aug. 15.

Two young girls were walking a reddish shaggy dog in the Grandview Mobile Home Park between 10:30 and 11 a.m. Aug.15 when the dog bit someone in the leg, police reported. The department is asking the owner to come forward so officers can get more information on the dog and situation.

If you ask me, the place needs an English-style pub.

And the Google Street View car needs to get round some more. Nosey parkers worldwide want to know about Red Wing.

Detroit is Hockeytown, Minnesota is the State of Hockey. They the two deserve the names. even though, as Teal Cup pronounced, Minnesota has consistantly offered out, and each hockey fan in Minnesota, whether we are speaking NHL or pee-wee, stands and cheers while a objective is scored. i've got seen crimson Wings video games, and that i do no longer see all Detroit followers getting off their butts.

I use to live in Rochester right by Red Wing. Had a lot of friends who went to High School there.

It's a vicious rumor.

I and Mrs. Micklethwaite have simply been discussing crochet patterns.

It's Labor Day weekend, I suggest a babbyque.

Is That, Done, Abba Done...

Or Done Juan...

what about it?