My boyfriend's dad hates me...?

Question

This is a long story but I'll make it as short as possible. I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 20. We've been together over a year and we love each other very much... his parents recently adored me until I became pregnant. My boyfriend's father is very abusive and out of fear, we both decided not to tell them. We both agreed on an abortion after we found out the baby wasn't going to make it. It was our decision as a couple and we're sticking by it so please nothing on the subject. Anyway, somehow his parents found out and now his parents believe I'm a bad influence and a liar and hate my guts, especially his father, who doesn't even believe I was pregnant to begin with.

They have taken away his car and only allow it for school. He is only allowed to see ONE of his friends (that's a kiss up to his dad) and the rest of us aren't allowed. Of course, he doesn't listen and we all see him anyway. I'm not allowed on their property or allowed to see him. He just recently blocked my number from his phone, as is everyone else except the one friend. His parents forced him into college when he wasn't ready to study for something THEY want him to do... so he ended up failing and loosing all funding. His dad is now paying for college. 

His dad has honestly lost his marbles, and everyone is getting sick of this but we aren't sure how to handle it. my boyfriend wants to stay in school and do good, and I want him to as well but as long as he lives under his parents roof, he has NO life and he's miserable. His dad and him are constantly fighting. Even if I left him (which I wouldn't) his dad would still run his life. Help?

Dovahkiin · Accepted Answer

Your choices are to wait for him to grow up or move on. Many people choose to go their own way rather than let the parents pay their way and own them. I went my own way rather than let my dad decide my future. Your boyfriend just does not have the maturity yet.

Anonymous · Answer

the best thing to do, is to understand that both of you are still willing to stay together. My wife's mother hates me still to this day, even after 2 kids. Some people you will never please. He NEEDS his education, just cause his father is paying for it and gave him a car means nothing, there is always OSAP and you can always find a car for 500 bucks, if he decides to walk out the door. You guys both have a long road ahead, unless you make the decision and say **** it at the end of the day you guys are 20 and 18. a lot of thinking and planning is the only thing to suggest

littleturtle · Answer

Wow, that's a lot of drama.. Firstly, parents don't realize what they are doing till a person is gone. I had to leave home for my family to treat me better and they did. So I can only advise that your boyfriend should go and live with you if its possible. If not, he needs to deal with the problems at home. 
And parents do that because they fear losing their son. They aren't and never will be ready for their son to leave home by the sounds of things. And they are showing their true colors towards your relationship and that is because they want to be involved and they want to decide which girl is worthy of their son. But the truth is. Its your choices. Your boyfriend needs to speak to his parents. And not be afraid. They are trying to control him threw what he has at home. He may need to show he is not afraid to lose what he has at home. He can do this by leaving home and being independent.

I hope this helped. I tried by best to advise a good answer.

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My boyfriend's dad hates me...?

3 Answers