For the stubborn ladies who don't leave an abusive relationship; why do you stay?

As someone that was in an abusive relationship, I can tell you that it had nothing to do with love, but more with BRAINWASHING.

Abusers who are good at what they do know to manipulate and break down their victim FIRST before anything else. They will sweet talk you, spoil you, pretend to love you. Then you start to notice that he's becoming possessive. It's ok, he'll croon in your ear, I'm doing this for your own good and because I love you so much. That's why you can't hang out with whatshername, because SHE'S a bad influence on you. You can't talk to other guys because he wants you all to himself. He will ISOLATE you and MAKE you feel this way. It's been said that cultists and abusers have the same brain wiring; they are good bullshitters.

After a year or so, you start to see his true colors. His temper flares, his jealousy erupts, you are to blame for everything. At this point, he has convinced you that NO ONE ELSE WILL LOVE YOU LIKE HE LOVES YOU, you aren't worth anything, no one wants you, and my personal favorite, YOU ARE MINE AND MINE ONLY. You start believing that you are a horrible piece of crap only worthy of his love, and that's not saying much. You start believing that he knows what's best for you, that he's actually taking care of you while slapping you and calling you a stupid bytch; you broke that dish because you can't stop shaking your hands, so YOU deserve it. You looked at another guy? You deserve to be punished. You didn't get food on the table when he wanted it? Punished, and YOU stupidly sit there BELIEVING that you deserve it.

He has twisted your way of thinking, manipulated you, and completely owns you. You are so broken down that you feel like no one loves you but him, and he's all that you have. Remember, you are cut off from the outside world because that's the way HE wants it. You feel like this is it for you.

That's why I stayed. It wasn't love, it was fear of leaving him that he would kill me. When I finally did leave, I looked over my shoulder constantly. It took a long time for his claws to retract from my brain. Once they did, I've never felt better.

Most abusive relationships I've seen are far more than just physical & happen in stages. The abuser usually isolates the victim from their friends & family leaving them nobody to go to for help. They then work over the victims self esteem making them feel like everything that's happening is their fault & that they NEED the abuser, like the abuser is the only person who could possible love them with all their faults. Often it gets to the point where the victim actually feels they deserve to be treated poorly & that they couldn't do any better if they left. Before long they feel trapped by the situation. It's far more psychological warfare than anything else.

that's in no way the sufferer's fault. She is overwhelmed down and made to experience like she is valueless and that no one will ever want her. He tells her that no rely the place she is going, he will discover her and it is frequently hell to pay while he does. He places her interior the hospital greater beneficial than as quickly as, only approximately killing her a pair of cases, and the community government do not do something to him even nevertheless they got here to the place of living after the beatings. He consistently talked himself out of hardship. How might desire to she get away if even the regulation did not do something?

These ladies aren't stubborn, they are scared of everything and everyone and terrified of what will happen to them. They may have loved the person once but with all the abuse/violence etc going on that love is lost and is replaced by fear of being out in the world trying to survive with their kids on their own. Their partner's have forced them to become so dependent and reliant on them that they are able to keep them under total control as they know they have the upper hand. This is why they won't leave the relationship. It isn't as simple as "why don't they just leave?".

We all like to be liked (or for that matter, want to be loved) and believe that this is a natural conclusion to our searching. Let me assure you that little in life is predictable. We stumble along and sometimes we get hit by the greatest disappointments. Yes, life can be a *****!

that kind of abuse is often psychological in large part, 1st off these men prey on weak women then they slowly erode their self confidence and make them feel that they are the only person that would ever want them then they just get meaner.

"But, *I* can change him!"

One of the biggest self delusions of so many women. It's really based on pure narcissism, ergo, the "*I*" part.

what a dumbasss this asker is.