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Biological father?
My husband and I are in the process of adopting a baby boy from foster care. We have his bio-mom's name, etc, but no information on the bio father. I know one day he may want to know who his biological family members are, but there's nothing listed on the birth certificate. I've asked if I can have the name of the bio father for the future, just in case, but was told I could not have it. Will my son (when he gets older of course) be privy to that information, or is it just gone forever? Has anyone had this experience?
We are in process of adopting, so I can't do that. Our son is just an infant. I cannot go public, nor do I want to post his bio mother's personal business (abandoning a baby isn't something I'm sure she's shared with everyone). I have seen her facebook page, but the bio-dad was a one night stand...they aren't in a relationship. I can't legally post his bio moms name with that information on it.
5 Answers
- ?Lv 77 years agoFavorite Answer
Dont worry about it. When the child is 18, he can ask the bio mother. She may not even know who the father is if she had multiple sex partners...i was adopted and my father is unknown. Doesnt bother me as a lot of people dont know one of their parents.
- ?Lv 67 years ago
I'm curious as to who told you that you "could not have" the biological father's name? When you adopt from foster care, you are given one or two chances (depending on the agency and state) to look at all the child's information and write down (or photocopy depending on the agency) the information.
So, when you asked if you could have it, was it because it was not available or unknown? If the adoption/foster care social worker said you "could not have it" for no particular reason, you might want to talk to her supervisor.
If they have no other information on the bio father, the name is either legitimately unknown or the biological mother does not wish to disclose it for her own personal reasons.
- EducatedLv 77 years ago
try facebook. Many people now post a picture of themselves with their name and date of birth (at least first name, location of birth and month and year) and also include his mother's name. Post it on facebook and ask everyone to share the picture around the state he was born in. People have found their parents this way.
- Katherine WLv 77 years ago
He would have to ask his biological mother, and even then she may not want to give him the information.
Life is a mystery for all of us. There are so many things that we can never know. He'll have to live with uncertainty.
There may be many reasons for her to keep the information private. She could be ashamed of having had sex with a stranger, for instance. Or she might have had sex with two men and not be sure who the father is. You just don't know.
If you can't accept this uncertainty, perhaps this isn't the child for you.
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- ZeldaLv 67 years ago
By then DNA testing will be advanced. Of course he will want to know who his father is.
This video talks about what it is like to be adopted and the hardships adopted people face.
