Where should I draw the line with my girlfriends privacy as far as FB or phone ? Not cool if one needs privacy to keep from boyfriend .?

The worst thing here is that she has two sets of rules -- SHE gets to see everything; she hides stuff from YOU.

The fact is that it's up to invididuals to decide what to share and what not to share. That is each person's right.

If a guy hits her up, that's not a problem. She can't control the actions of every other human. What she CAN do is say no to any advances. That doesn't mean she always has to give ANY reason, let alone that she's in a relationship (marriage being the exception).

No is all she needs to say.

But she has no right to spy on you using your electronics. That's just wrong.

It's also a red flag, especially combined with her secretiveness.

Also, it's rude to ignore the person you're with, to communicate with everyone else. Brief or emergency communications are one thing, but hanging out electronically with others, while ignoring you is rude.

You need to stop spying on her electronics.

I really don't see how this is really a relationship, or at least, it's not a good one.

What do you mean you've seen things that aren't "cool"? She has a right to have friends; she can't prevent guys from hitting on her.

Anyway, all spying is wrong.