Why can t I look people in the eyes?

Oh dear. It could be due to 2 things which are partly overlapping but also mutually distinct. One is shyness and the other is lack of confidence.

Which one applies more to you? Your last sentence about not being able to even look at yourself in the eye is extreme and suggests to me it's the second or lack of confidence.

And it may be even a third reason, sorry if you think it's rude but honestly it suggests to me you are depressed. Or maybe it was just a one off due to the fact you were comcious about the point and had a hard day.

You alone can answer what it is honestly and correctly, I can only give you some pointers.

Whatever it was, all 3 situations are improbable if not completely conquerable. .

People have said this helps with the eye contact fear. You can give another person the impression that you are looking at him or her in the eyes by looking at a point near the eyes, like the far side of an eyebrow.

I've written some social anxiety answers recently, and you might like to click on my name and read. There are some good books. Slow breathing is a simple and effective way to calm down fast. If you anticipate an awkward social encounter, you can prepare for it with a few slow breaths through the nose. With a little practice, you can do this so that no notices.

I RARELY FOCUS someone's eyes I usually look at some other feature on their face. This goes back to my mother telling me NOT to stare or point at someone when I was 3 years old.

It's a kind of mental self and defense. I was shy. When I am online I am a different person. Fading into the background and becoming a silent observer still works strategically, but I've become more outgoing and self confident in real life because I've learned how and had to defend myself ONLINE to SURVIVE ONLINE. I am an online abuse SURVIVOR.

You're not used to it. You just need practice.