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How to get someone to lose weight without hurting their feelings?
I started spending time with this guy, and I wish there was a way to inspire him to lose weight. He wants to date me, but the honest truth is I’m not attracted to him at his current weight; he’s unhealthy and his doctor made it clear that he needs to change his lifestyle. He claimed to be motivated, saw me doing an extended diet myself, and now seems to have ZERO motivation - and doesn’t even seem to actually see that he has an issue. I am at a totally healthy weight but want to trim down- yet he is obese and will make comments on things I shouldn’t eat as he does nothing to change himself (“oh you should skip the carbs” as he gobbles away). I care about his health and it genuinely seems like he’s lying to himself and doesn’t see that his weight is a serious health issue. Everyone says lead by example and encouragement, but it seems like he truly doesn’t see himself accurately. Does anyone have advice on how to actually help someone see that they have a weight problem, or is this a lost cause?
4 Answers
- Serene ELv 72 years ago
YOU CAN"T!!!! That's ridiculous. If he asks then you can tell him. Otherwise, keep your mouth shut.
- Blue SkyLv 72 years ago
It sounds like you have tried everything, so why just tell him the truth. Its gonna hurt, but it might be enough to motivate him to get on a diet. If he refuses, then you can honestly say you tried your best.
- 2 years ago
No one is ever a lost cause. Perhaps he doesn't feel motivated because he thinks that the weight loss process takes too long, or that he could never do it. Great motivational ideas involve sitting down with him and having a serious talk. Ask him questions like, "How do you envision yourself as a healthy person? What things can't you do now that you would be able to do as a healthier person? What are the benefits of being healthy, and do you see yourself trying your best to reach those benefits? Do you want to live a long, healthy and happy life, free to jump and run and do a bunch of fun things? Do you see yourself as unattractive and want to improve on that by losing weight?" There's a bunch of questions you can ask to help change someone's thoughts and perspectives on their own health and future. I hope this helps. Good luck to the both of you!
