Custody of children. ?

What is in the best interests of the child?  Emotional support is paramount. Not materialism.  If the father had always been the one who cared for the children and who they turn to for love then the father would gain custody.  It is rare but it does happen.  Far more common is that dad provides material support but mom provides emotional support.  So the children should be with mom.  You won't like it but even having a dog is the same.  The dog will choose who it thinks of as its "owner".  Based on who loves it and makes it feel safe and secure and wanted.  Not even on who feeds it.

Unless the mother is a truly unfit person then why would a judge not consider her first?  And of course the other parent always claims that their partner is unfit.  Because the reason for the divorce is that they both dislike the other.  Judges have to look beyond the petty squabbles and look for real evidence.

It’s decided in court by the judge. 

and the judge decides what’s in the best interest of the children.

If both parents are fit to parent, custody usually goes to the mother. 

Negligence, irresponsibility,  etc., will prevent a parent from getting custody, whether male or female.

It has to be demonstrated, though. 

He said, she said, holds no weight in a decision. Judges act on available proof.