How do I ask this guy if he likes me without actually asking if he likes me?

Long distance relationships are hard to make work because it’s very difficult to find out what the other person is really like. It’s easy to put on an act (over half of good communication is nonverbal). You need to be participating in a wide variety of wholesome activities together to find out what the other person is really like in all types of situations. Pay special attention to how they react when they don’t get their own way or when something goes wrong.

Could you possibly be making dating choices mainly based upon whether someone likes you and you like them? Unfortunately this approach to dating, used by most people, usually leads to a broken heart.

May I suggest that the first question to ask yourself when considering whether or not to date someone is, “Is this person a strong person?” If they’re not, no matter how much you like them, how much they like you, or how “cute” or “hot” they are, - please don’t date them. A strong person has good character (honesty, integrity, trustworthiness), displays a positive attitude (cheerful, caring, friendly, forgiving, helpful, and respectful), fulfills their responsibilities (for handling people who are pains in a positive way, for always trying to make a good choice, for taking care of themselves, for serving others), gives their best effort, and demonstrates self-control (of their body, anger, mouth and money).

My suggestion is that you put in the effort necessary to become a strong person (if you’re not already), forget about this guy unless he’s a strong person who you can somehow see on a regular basis, and eventually look for this type of guy (otherwise you’re setting yourself up for a broken heart). Unfortunately this type of man is difficult to find – but save yourself the heartache and don’t settle for less.

(Please remember that you eventually want a 50 or 60 year marriage - not a 5 or 10 year marriage.)

Hope this helps!

PS The best way to get to know a strong man without dating is to participate in the activities of a community service or a school organization.

Please do not do this. No matter how subtly or indirectly asked, a question of whether or not he "likes" you would be begging to be insulted. That's a social faux pas in which you ask a question that puts the person asked into the awkward position of having to give you an answer that will insult you or hurt your feelings. 

Either you enjoy exchanging messages with him, chatting with him, phoning with him even. Or you don't. If you enjoy it, then don't muck it up with trying to make is more interesting and romantic. That kind of drama is NOT how to handle the guys.

If your goal spending time with a guy who likes you, getting to know each other better, then time spent cultivating fellows who live far away and are "busy with work" instead of eager to meet you. 

I suspect that this fellow has no serious interest in you, that you are one of several gullible young women with whom he amuses himself, flirting and feeling like a big shot and probably playing with himself. Look for someone your own age and close to home and it will work out better. Like maybe an actual DATE. 

Ask directly without shyness 

Expose your bOOB LINE a bit to give attention