Sheila

My ex-husband is the treasurer for a group that opposes a property tax increase. He answers questions on Internet forums to clarify exactly why he is against the increase.

The opposition has begun posting my name, alongside the name of numerous other people in newspaper forums with stories opposing the issue. My name would be the only one singled out in quotes.

Now, they have taken to not only using my name but slandering me (claiming that I'm obese, that I hate librarians, that I'm a teabagger, I'm a nut case, I'm histrionic, I'm a fear-monger, and they allege that I or someone else on that list plagiarized a web design for a Website and on and on). I think the scariest comment came from a man who claimed that he knew who I "hang out with".

The comments are particularly bad on the city-endorsed newspaper. My ex-husband is in opposition to a tax increase the city wants passed. This local newspaper will remove the comments but usually it takes one business day to do that. They do claim that posting my name publicly is a form of free speech: The person writing these things about me is protected by a pseudonym.

Now, the editor himself just posted an editorial stating that anyone who opposes this tax is a nutcase and is offering poison red kool-aid to the people who listen. It sounds like the paper is inciting the slander. The owner of the paper basically told me to keep quiet about the attacks as to not "scratch the itch". He said that he would allow me to write an editoral about my opinion on the issue: That is not something that I want to do. I want to address the personal attacks and why people make them.

The other websites seem to do a better job of moderating the comments. I've never seen my last name posted on those forums. Only the city endorsed paper seems to have a problem posting my full name.

The obese claim can really hurt my business: I am a weight loss hypnotherapist...I don't know if anyone would take the nut-job/histrionic claim seriously...but I am working towards licensure as a psychotherapist and do find it a bit disconcerting.

Do you have any advice? I'd like it to stop.

What suggestions would you give to protect myself? At what point should I take legal action? Should I take it against the publishing company?

Thank you in advance.

I grew up in a small town. There were less than 100 of us in the graduating class. A former classmate just purchased a local nightclub and invited us to his birthday party at his club.

I haven't seen him in over twenty years, so I have absolutely no idea what to bring for a birthday gift (if anything).

Do you have any ideas?

Thank you in advance for your help.

Hi,

I need advice. A few months back my husband was fired. He worked for the City in which I live. He came home humiliated because he was escorted from the building by a police officer he worked with daily. This officer stated that he "had a rage disorder" while escorting him from the building.

Two weeks after he was fired, I found paperwork in my car which detailed a $500 cash fine that he paid for "falling asleep" on the job in Dec. of 2007. The fine was levied in May of 2008.

As a child, my husband had a history of seizure disorders. His mother once told me that he would appear to sleep during seizures and be easily startled once the seizure ended. During a seizure he would appear to be asleep and easily startled. I called his employer to try to talk to the officer to find out what he saw, thinking that this would be important information to get to his doctor.

The City Attorney called me back. She was rude and nasty. She told me that he was fired because his boss claimed that he beat me and "threw [me] into a wall". She questioned my character before hanging up on me. I was sure to take very good notes so that I could share them with my City Councilman.

I've written to numerous public officials to find out why they would fire someone over a rumor of domestic violence yet fail to investigate the claim (in our state, all credible reports of violence made to the PD must be investigated). No one has answered my letters.

My spouse was awarded unemployment but the City challenged it. The week before the hearing, the city's legal team sent the same paperwork to our home twice. They called me incessantly and demanded private information about him and our relationship (we have since separated). They even came to my home unannounced.

At the unemployment hearing, his supervisor stated that she fired him because he was unmotivated. She claimed that I expected him to be a stay at home dad while I worked (I work from a home office). She also ridiculed my health condition as something he made up to play hooky. I was once diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I think he may have taken me to the doctor's office once with the permission of his boss, but aside from that, this had no bearing on anything.

I've never met anyone my husband worked with.

I'm still in shock and at a loss as far as what to do. Does anyone have any advice? On on hand, I want to get on with my life but on the other, I'm scared this woman is going to bully other people if nothing is done to stop her.

Any thoughts?

We've been together for sixteen years. There has been a lot of violence on his part (i.e. hitting walls, screaming, vehicle sabotage) but he's never hit me.

Last night, while sleeping, he picked me up and started to attack me. I don't know exactly what he did but the episode left me with a sore back. I'm terrified and still shaking.

He claims that he dreamt that I was a hippo that was trying to attack him (yeah, yeah, I guess that's a jab at my weight).

Anyhow, he remembers the incident in detail. I always thought that people with sleep disorders never remembered such incidents.

Has anyone heard of such a thing?

If so, where can one learn more?

If you've been through this, what did you do to feel safe?

Thank you.

And, yeah, the crack-pot answers and jokes will probably help me deal with it. So, feel free to jest.

I'm trying to come up with a story to help a kid get over her fear of sleeping alone. By understanding those things that scare other kids, I can help put her fears into perspective.

Any input will be appreciated.

Help, I need a new laptop and don't have a clue to buy. I'd like to use the laptop to watch videos, create videos and assorted mp3s to upload to various media sites.

What laptops would you recommend? How much working memory would you suggest that I consider buying? Are there any features that you would suggest for these uses?

Any help will be truly appreciated. Thanks!!

Last month, my neighbors wanted less than $250.00 to replace a small portion of an ajoining fence. I agreed and even oferred the man cash which he refused until after the work was done.

We were initially allowed to help install the posts but he chose to put the pickets up while we were away so he could install the smooth side of the fence towards his yard (the way his wife wanted it to look).

Anyhow, we received the $505.00 bill six days ago. I don't understand the disparity between the quote and the actual bill and am trying to look into it. This morning his wife confronts my teen daughter demanding payment and now I get the feeling like something isn't quite right.

What would you do? Would you pay it without question so they would leave your child alone? Would you ask for receipts in order to verify the cost? Would you pay the original agreed cost until you could verify the actual cost?

Any advice would be helpful.

We've been together 15 years, most of them rough. I'm unclear why, but my husband had a falling out with his family 8 years ago, they blame me and say that they won't speak to him until we are divorced. He's been tough to live with since, he flies into rages, will not communicate with or plan anything with me. He's a good man and a good father but this conflict has made him so angry that he cannot love me.

We have separate bedrooms. I run the household, clean and fix the meals but spend the evenings/weekends and holidays alone in my room in order to avoid the fighting. It's become so weird; he refers to himself as my ex-husband, wants me to change my last name, and even told me that I could see other people but he will not consider a divorce under any circumstances.

I have distracted myself with hobbies, school, our kids, and volunteering in order to keep busy. The loneliness is really starting to get to me. What do other people do to cope in bad marriages?

I'm a hypnotist creating free mp3's for my website. I've been eyeing a Marantz CDR300 Portable CD-R/RW Recorder. Does anyone have any feedback on this unit or recommendations for other equipment?

Thanks!!

My gifts tend to be old fashioned. What are some things that modern teens enjoy?