♥perishedmemories♥

They don't do a thing. They are often fat. They have bloated egos and think they are wonderful. Really, they just sit around all day and pat themselves on the back. If you ever ask them a question or bring up an issue they give you infuriating, patronizing responses. Then they go back to their danish for the next hour and a half. You are never better off for having interacted with them. Does this fit your impression of Human Resources?

I've never really been happy at a job. One pattern I perceive in myself, which I believe is destructive and at the crux of my unhappiness, is that I tend to target one person and get increasingly annoyed at him or her. As time goes on, I will detest him or her for their mere presence. If she says something, it immediately grates against me. This person can sense this, and starts to see me as an antagonist or opponent, or someone who doesn't like them. And here's the key-- while I truly feel averse, strongly dislike the person, I will never do anything against them. I just haven't picked up the political skill/ habit/ behavior/ pattern of actually ever hurting anyone or saying things against them. I just find that difficult to do, even then I myself am being attacked. I'm antagonizing this person and making it completely transparent to them that I dislike them, yet I won't be doing anything about it. I'll be just stewing and simmering and suffering on my own about it.

Meanwhile, she, aware of my dislike, will take stabs and cuts at me whenever she gets the chance. Covertly, insidiously, by subtle ways. And I get in all sorts of trouble, I get criticized, I can work well and do a stellar job 90% of the time but she'll notice this 10% when I'm slacking or taking a well-deserved break, and draw attention to it and magnify it somehow so that it looks like I'm always doing a poor job, somehow make this minor percent of the time look like the majority, make it look like the whole or entire time. This is just one recent example. I'll get attacked, quietly, by this person, and it seems on the one hand perfectly reasonable-- of course she's like that, because I hate her and she hates me-- but on the other hand, I realize that I'm bringing this on myself, because my air/ atmosphere/ mood when she is around reveals to her quite clearly that I don't like her and find her annoying and stupid and don't care what she has to say, and if only I could get over it and just --ugh!! be friends with her somehow, I think a lot of my work unhappiness would go away.

But I just can't bring myself to do it, especially since she takes every opportunity to affirm that she doesn't like me, to reinforce the dislike. I've never done a thing bad to her, but she finds so many opportunities to dig at me, like she'll pass around cake to everyone but me, and I get the feeling in many small ways that I'm not even aware of, that was a trivial example, but she scrapes away at me in her spare time, which is plentiful. And I feel like I just can't win, and people talk about not wanting to go to work on monday, but I feel like, my experience of being at my job is a constant, searing, low-boiling agony, there's always this level of pain and torture present. Every moment I am there, sometimes, it seems like I am just tolerating this pain, and it all becomes focused around this one person whom I identify as the source of my pain. I've done this in just about every job I've had-- one person, I identify, as someone whom I just can't stand, whom I despise deeply and thoroughly, and all my unhappiness will be centered or clustered around this person and their very existence.

How do I fix this?

I feel sad, confused, and frustrated when I think about my resume and my "career path." I've had all sorts of odds and ends jobs. I've worked in random film productions, launched a retail store for my friend's mom, sat in a stock room and took pictures of fashion jewelry for a wholesale/ importer, and sometimes answered the phone; taught SAT classes, subbed at an urban city public school, and now I work at a call center. Can anyone see a career path in this messy, jumbled set of jobs I've had??? And I haven't worked full time for most of it- I've just put multiple part time gigs together. I don't know what to do with myself or how to make my life more cohesive/ thematical. Please help!

I'd like to buy some designer jeans but not sure what brand I like. What do these brands mean to you? Levi's, 7 for all mankind, lucky, dkny, etc. I am trying to decide which brand is "for me" and I want to know what the image is associated with each brand. The names I gave are only examples, I'm open to suggestions.

why does alfred, lord tennyson's name have a comma?

the one where he doesn't want to sleep with her?

the sweater is an off-white wool knit, and the stain has been there for a couple of weeks now, and i have washed it twice to no result !

such as in AIM or iChat

-you've gone to the beach

-you've gone to great adventure (six flags)

-you've seen a summer blockbuster

-you've got a tan

and [you fill in] ?????

how?

i'm asking this in 'physics' because i just realized everyone in 'fashion and accessories' is ten years old.

what is a common household object that i can use to stretch out a new pair of flats? particularly the toebox

any advice, or helpful books, sites, places?

i've been poking my eye, it's getting red, the contact is stuck to my eye. i don'tusualy have this problem and i've had contacts for several years. i tried using eye drops (contacts compatible, the kind i usually use) and also flushing my eyes with water, but the contact won't budge.

have you used it to go grocery shopping yet?

personally, I do an advanced search for all open questions, such as "deleted points" or "yahoo unfair," and then I answer all the questions and commiserate with all the people who just got a violation. there are always like twenty questions at any given time, from people who feel they were unfairly violated.

it's like they're friendly but the don't care and it always gets me even though i know it shouldn't