johnmfsample

I have a 1999 penny with what appears to be an error in the third "9" of the year mark on the obverse side. It looks like the die didn't quite get it. I haven't seen any similar notes about this error, and it's not in Whitman's Redbook. If it's truly a die error and not from everyday wear and tear, what could it be worth? FYI: AU-50!!

I have an old record player that has no outputs other than the plug. Is there anything I can hook up to connect it to my computer? Is there something that can splice the speaker cables and connect it to my microphone on my PC? Or is there some sort of special needle I can buy that has a microphone output? Somebody Help!!!

I have an old record player that has no outputs other than the plug. Is there anything I can hook up to connect it to my computer? Is there something that can splice the speaker cables and connect it to my microphone on my PC? Or is there some sort of special needle I can buy that has a microphone output? Somebody Help!!!

I work in a law office and it's just me and my boss, the lawyer. He's a complete dick to me. I have no room for advancement and there is nobody higher up than him. Everyday, he points out little mistakes that I've made, even when they're his mistakes. Just today he asked me to get him a copy of a mortgage, and when I came back with it, he asked me why I made a copy of the mortgage. When I replied that he had asked for it, he said he never said such a thing. But this has happened every day for the past year and a half, and I can't find another job because I'm lacking in experience... Any suggestions? Keep in mind I've confronted him about this before and asked that I be treated like some sort of dignified human, and not a dog, and he responded that he didn't know what I meant.

I have an idea for a tattoo, but I don't want to let everyone know about it. Is there anyone (preferably non-Christian) that can help me out and email me a design? Further details await

email: smelinosky@yahoo.com

I'm not sure at all how it goes, but I know it has to do with Brian being color blind and Stewie ridiculing him because he can't see the colors of the American flag, and thus, is a "Commie". If anybody knows how it goes, please help me out here. I saw it the other night baked off my ar$e and can't remember it for the life of me!!

I'm not sure at all how it goes, but I know it has to do with Brian being color blind and Stewie ridiculing him because he can't see the colors of the American flag, and thus, is a "Commie". If anybody knows how it goes, please help me out here. I saw it the other night baked off my ar$e and can't remember it for the life of me!!

Recently, I've been seeing too many companies outsourcing their customer service to different countries, namely India. Granted, they work for much less, I get so upset because I can't understand them. Whenever I ask to speak to a supervisor, they get all pissy and I'm pretty sure that they transfer me back to themselves. Even Yahoo! outsources to India for their customer service. As such, do you think it's negatively effecting our economy, or is it boosting it?

I think I just shot back down to a level 3 because of this question. O well, what can you do?

My friend is in the process of getting a full sleeve that he calls "The Destruction of the Dinosaurs". Basically, from his wrist to his elbow are some badass-looking dinosaurs, like a roaring T-Rex and a scary raptor, with palm trees and such. On his elbow is a comet sending off a huge blast into the dino's. Then on his bicep, you see stars that go into outer space with miscellaneous space-stuff, until you get to his shoulder, where there's the star-destroyer from Star Wars. I mean, that's pretty badass, and now I want to get one. I'm thinking an entire Star Wars theme; any suggestions?

A woman went to a homeopathic doctor named Dr. Grey because she wanted a bigger chest, but didn't want surgery or those risky pills with horrible areola side-effects. The good Doctor Grey told her that getting a bigger chest was easy; all she had to do was rub her breasts each day while showering and chant, "Scooby Dooby Dooby, I want bigger boobies." Sure enough, after a month of this, her bust increased three-fold.

One morning while in a hurry, she forgot to do her mantra in the shower, so on the bus, she quietly rubbed her breasts and said her chant.

A gentlemen observing this curious behavior came up to her and asked, "Let me guess: You're a patient of Dr. Grey."

"Yea," she replied, "but how did you know?"

The man looked at his crotch and said, "Hickory dickory dock...."

...you have sex each day for 365 days and melt the condoms into rubber tires?

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A good year!

Three vampires go to a bar in search of bloodlust for the night. The first one finds a cute blonde and tells the other two he's going to "eat her out". She laughs, and the vampires understand what this really meant, and laughed along with her. The second vampire finds a chubby, but affable young lady and decides he will take her home. He informs the last one about this and the vampires nod as they part ways. The last vampire is sitting at the bar when he sees a frazzled and blatantly b*tchy woman walking around. He stands up as if to leave and looks at the bartender and asks for a cup of boiling water when he gets back. The vampire seduces the woman and takes her to the bathroom. Moments later, he comes back.

Here's this theory I've been working on. HP is a lot like Star Wars (a son finds out his dad was a great something-or-other and tries to be like him, everybody compares the two, the force = magic, lightsaber = wand, ron & hermione = han solo & leia, HP = Luke Skywalker, etc etc etc). So is Valdemort REALLY Potter's father?! Haha, JK, I already figured it out.

can i have a reality show where i look for the most fat, lazy and stoned person ON EARTH?!? if tyra banks (who isn't hot at all) can get a show about hot girls, and regis philbin (who isn't too smart) can get a show about smarts, can I legitimately get a show about fat, lazy stoners who know trivial facts? who's gonna watch it? would you?

Now that she has entered rehab, don't you think it's about time we talk to our children about who should and shouldn't be role models? Isn't it right to tell children that even though rehab offers a second chance, you shouldn't have to go there in the first place? Are we just telling our kids that it's okay to f*ck up, because there will always be someone else to help you out, even if you are famous?

it seems like i've been going out on endless and unimportant dates that don't add up to anything. all i can do is linger on girls from my past now. i can't fall asleep anymore. why is it that whenever i want something, i can't get it, and when i get something good, i don't want it? is my heart slowly dying?

But nobody ever talks about the Twelfth ingredient:

Fear.

Like when dad hit mom, and you asked what was wrong and dad said, "Hey son, you want a popsicle?" Then life would be good again forever! Then your dog died and you started crying, but a popsicle made it better. Then grandma told you that you were a bastard child, and being six-years-old, you didn't understand what she meant, but you knew it was pretty hateful. But then mom went out and bought the Mickey Mouse popsicles, and you got to choose which flavor you wanted (you know, orange for Donald Duck, Grape for Goofy, cherry for Mickey, etc.). So when a popsicle is given to a child, is that the universal sign for "Something That Will Probably Scar You For Life Just Happened"?

While perusing through the 567 pictures of the Grammy's that Yahoo! photos had to offer, I noticed that I only recognized three faces: Tony Bennett, Peter Frampton and (I don't even know why he was there, but...) Quentin Tarantino. Is it that I'm old (23) or is it that anybody can be a celebrity these days? Or is it just that Hollywood buys and sells souls?