kinsey07

My uncle is turning 60 - and we are all taking the piss (Aussie slang for "making fun") because he is one of those people who believes he is still in his prime, still living out the days of his youth etc. (and looking back at past photos of him, the years haven't been kind!) I want to put together a joke present to stir him up - so far I have the following:

Haemorrhoid cream, adult diapers, socks & sandals combo, arthritis gel, seniors card application, prune juice, sponge (for sponge baths!) and a pack of handkerchiefs.

Any other suggestions for similar items would be fantastic.

And to any of you "do gooders" out there who think I'll hurt his feelings should move on. This uncle has been a constant presence in my life since I was 3 and to put things in perspective, this is what he got me for my 13th birthday: Tissues, aspirin, a hot water bottle, chocolate and a box of tampons. Yes, a PMS pack. So payback will be sweet and just having a good laugh with my family will be sweeter. Thanks!

Just tying some ends on our wedding planning and have realised that we will actually be ahead of schedule on the day.

Post-ceremony photos will finish at about 5pm... however the reception doesn't even start until about 6pm.

What do we do? If we go an extra hour of photos I don't know if we will need to fork out any more $$$ for the photographer (which we are trying to avoid)... but I also would feel weird going back to a hotel room/getting to the reception early.

I am restricted on the ceremony time (3:30), which the church has set for us and I don't imagine we would be there any longer than 1 hour (inc ceremony & family photos etc).

Any ideas would be great!

Thanks in advance :)

A question for those of you who are planning or have had interstate weddings....

Here's the background: My fiance and I currently live in Adelaide (SA) and wish to have our wedding in the Gold Coast (QLD), as this location is more convenient for the majority of our guests who are spread along the coast (from Bundaberg to Katoomba), as well as having special meaning for us.

How soon would we need to be up at the GC before our wedding day? One week? Two weeks? I ask only because we would need to organise flights and accommodation for that time leading up to the wedding, and we are trying to determine whether we have our bucks/hens up there as well (as opposed to making our guys and girls travel twice - once to Adelaide for the bucks/hens and again to the GC for the wedding). It would also be good to just do a final check on all the vendors/suppliers etc while we are there.

What did you end up doing, and was there anything you would have done differently if given the chance? Suggestions & ideas very welcome :)

Thanks for your help!

I was listening to the radio recently and they played a great, lighthearted song... the twist is that the lyrics consisted ENTIRELY of various French words that are commonly used in English - words like souffle, boudoir, papier mache, au revoir, derriere, collage, baguette, a la carte, abbatoir, crepe, chauffeur, attache, touche, memoir, entree, deja vu, adieu and even Gerard Depardieu - so it was silly and made no sense whatsoever, but it was hilarious!

It was sung by a man to the tune of Edith Piaf's "La Vie en Rose". If you could help me find out who sung this and where I can listen to it, it would be much appreciated... I need a good laugh!

It really amazing to realise how much of the French language we use in everyday (English-speaking!) life, without even knowing!

Thanks for your help :-)

So here's our dilemma.

We've decided that we'll be inviting children to our wedding. But what happens when our friends/family receive the invitation that says "To Bob, Jane & Little Johnny"?

Does putting Little Johnny's name on the invitation mean that he HAS to come? I can understand that for some parents, it is hard to go anywhere without your kids (ours is a destination wedding), whereas there are others who would appreciate some time away from theirs once in a while, but don't want them to think that they HAVE to bring Little Johnny just because his name is on the invitation.

Basically, we want to give parents the choice of bringing them or not, but are not sure how to word it so that they:

a) Don't feel that they have to bring their kids just because their names are on the invites; or

b) Feel like they are not allowed to bring children because their names are NOT on the invites.

What if I worded the envelope and invitation to "Bob & Jane" and then included "We are happy for Little Johnny to join you if you wish" on the inside? Has anyone done this before, and was it appreciated or did people not really care?

Thanks :-)

Here's the details:

- Interstate wedding (i.e. no one will have their own cars to drive)

- 4 groomsmen, 4 bridesmaids (total 10 in wedding party including bride and groom)

- We'd like to have a moment to ourselves between ceremony and reception, but:

- Would also like to take some photos with the wedding party.

I was thinking to get just one limo, to:

1. Take the bridesmaids, my parents and I to the ceremony.

2. Take my new husband and I to the reception.

The issue here is... we kind of want photos of us with the wedding party, but cannot figure out how to transport them to where we will be taking photos (if we are taking the limo for ourselves)! We're trying to avoid hiring a second car to keep costs down... But if we did, would it look weird if we put the wedding party in the limo (while hubby and I use the extra hired sedan)?

Or is it worth sacrificing the "time alone" and just travelling in the one limo together to get photos and then arrive at the reception?

I hope this makes sense! Thanks in advance for any advice you can give me.

Over the past couple of years, I have received pamper packs from people close to me, but have not yet gotten around to using any of them. By pamper packs, I'm referring to gift packs containing some or all (or more than!) the following:

Moisturiser/body lotion/body butter

Shower gel

Bath salts

Hand creams

Makeup

Serums, lotions, hair product......... the list goes on!

Here's what's funny. Compared to most girls, I'm kinda scarce when it comes to using this sort of stuff (which is probably why they get it for me in the first place!) and usually when I buy something like a moisturiser or sunscreen it can last me for ages. However, I would love to use all of it eventually - I just don't know where to start.

What do you do - do you concentrate on using one set of things at a time? Do you have a system where you rotate your stuff (e.g. Use Cream A on the weekends and Cream B on weekdays)? Or do you just go all out and open up whatever depending on your mood?

I have already shared some of these products with my mum and two sisters to keep supplies from overflowing(!) but I still have a fair bit left. This does seem to me like it could be a silly question but any advice would be awesome - thanks.

I love the swimsuit worn here: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-20239...

...and was hoping to buy it (or something similar) online. I love the shorts and the colour... Links to the swimsuit or other similar options would be really helpful - Thanks!

I have read numerous times about how "so-and-so earns 2 billion dollars a year, which would equal approximately $5,479,452 a day, or, more specifically, $228,310 an hour....."

You would think that they could just give up even *one* day of pay and donate it to a charity or something? One day? Of the 365 that there are?

(Apologies for my tone, but I was just reading a letter asking for $1333 that would be enough to buy 6 months worth of medical materials and supplies for a hospital delivery room in an African country...)

What do you think? Or am I totally missing something here?

I am currently an undergraduate student studying where postgraduate degrees in physiotherapy are not available. I would be willing to move interstate if that was my only option, but I am just checking if there are any other options for me that would allow me to study this degree externally.

Your help would be most appreciated.

My partner and I have been together for nearly a year (not married) and I've been thinking over the last couple of weeks how we could celebrate it. He's done the quick thing and told me he will take care of the "night" half of the day, so that leaves me with the morning and the early afternoon to do my thing for us.

Here's the situation: I'm 19, he's 20 and he is the love of my life. We've done a lot of things already to have fun when we have the weekends together: movies, dinners, club nights, bowling, beaching, drag-racing and just your regular stay-at-home days cuddling up in front of the tv.

Now I want us to do something different - please help!

My partner and I have planned a little getaway in the Gold Coast sort of end September/start October and I was trying to figure out the local public transport system. We're planning on staying in the middle of Surfer's Paradise, in the hub of it all so car rental would be superfluous; I think we'd only need to work out travel to the themeparks and the Broadbeach area.

I suppose bus-hopping it is the likely option, but if there are any well-travelled folk/locals who could give us a tip or two it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Who was the last person you:

1) Spoke to on the phone?

2) Shared a secret with?

3) Laughed with till you cried?

4) Kissed?

5) Introduced yourself to?

6) Apologised to?

7) Said "I love you" to?

8) Bought a gift for?

All I wanted was to write

A tidy little rhyme;

Something witty, something sweet

That wouldn't take much time.

I sat here thinking, in my chair;

My head was ticking through,

And when I thought all hope was lost

My thoughts swept back to you.

"Go on," you said to me that day.

"You've got it in you, mate!"

As soon as I done took your word

I also took the bait.

So here I am, at three o'clock

My typing fingers tense..

These words now published on the Net -

I'm hoping they make sense!

KS - 2008

Are there any side effects to taking the Pill at this age, or at any age, for that matter?

Your help is much appreciated.

I do!!

This time it's Abba's "Mamma Mia"... and while I'm not too embarrassed to admit that I'm not complaining, I thought I might ask what songs you've got on YOUR mind... 10 Points to a classic!

I've recently started seeing a guy, and a nice one at that. We talk a lot and do loads of things together, and we've got plenty in common.

We love spending time with each other, we're both in agreement here :)

However:

When we're out to wine and dine I find that it's really difficult for me to eat. I have no issues with body image, I have a broad preference when it comes to food (I love it and normally eat loads) but I just can't figure out what's wrong. I get a nauseating feeling in the pit of my stomach but I try so hard to eat a good fill of food every time we go out -- it ain't easy.

Is it because I'm really into him? I feel great when I'm with him and I don't have any insecurities (that are out of the ordinary for most people).. Is there a way to remedy this -- I feel like I let us both down if I don't eat enough!

One of my work colleagues is celebrating her birthday in the next week - she is slightly senior, and we are more "colleagues" than "friends". I thought it would be nice to give her a card anyway, just to be polite, but I'm not entirely sure what to write inside.

Just wondering because I frequently liase with one and calling him "sir" just sounds awkward...

Cheers for your help.

Hi, just came across something on the Net; it was a tattoo on someone's side and was curious to know what it meant:

"Faut soffrir pour etre belle."