deathvalleydiva

My 20 year old daughter is moving in with a roommate at college in August. They are friends and excited to be living together. The other girl has a dog and told my daughter she’s going to get a camera to put in the living room so she can see her dog on her phone while she’s at school. My daughter isn’t big on the idea as she feels like it’s an invasion of her privacy when she’s there alone. This seems to be an impasse for them. I know it’s not illegal, that’s not my question, just wondering what your thoughts are. Is my daughter being unreasonable? 

Please give intelligent explanation.

Help me out, my eyes are green, my ex husband's are blue and my daughter's are brown (I PROMISE you he's her father).  She's taking a genetics class in college and jokingly asked if she was adopted because that is supposed to be impossible.  Any explanations? 

I say no, fight me.

This question is not for me, I'm happily married, it was posed to me by a college age young lady.  Where do you draw the line between "you should trust your partner" and "that's just disrespectful"?  She told me her boyfriend has a female friend from high school that she has never met.  Her boyfriend and the girl text every day, and when he is home for breaks (they are from the same city) he meets the girl for lunch or coffee and she goes to his house sometimes to "visit his dog."  He has never once included his girlfriend when they get together.  She asked me because I'm a grown up and happily married and this is her first relationship.  I told her that I have male friends BUT, I don't text them daily, and I don't meet up with them without my husband. I've known all my guy friends since before I met my husband and I was eager for him to meet them, and their wives, and we all hang out together.  I don't hang out with my guy friends alone.  I think that is not appropriate. Thoughts? This is how we do things in my marriage, but I'm interested to hear from others about their relationships. To me, if the girl is truly just a friend, he'd want her to meet his girlfriend.(they're all 3 from the same city)

Every year I get a Christmas bonus at work, usual a few hundred dollars.  I use some of it to tip my housekeeper and yard man.  This is is the first year that we did not get a bonus.  My husband and I are fortunate to still have jobs, but we both took a pay cut this year so we have definitely felt the effects of the pandemic.  Without my Christmas bonus we just aren't going to be able to tip our helpers.  I don't know how to handle it.  Should I just not say anything, or should I explain to them that it's been a tight year for us?

I was exposed to my son who was exposed to covid. It’s been a week since his exposure and he has no symptoms, neither do the rest of us who’ve been around him. My work is hinting at I should quarantine for 14 days because I was exposed to an exposed person who is just fine a week later. My son is autistic and putting him through a test is not ideal. Especially when he doesn’t have symptoms. 

Our receptionist quit and I have been having to answer the phones and the door (from my desk upstairs) in addition to doing my own job, while they look for someone else. They’ve gotten 166 resumes and interviewed 3 people. They are running the ad again because they just can’t find the right person. It’s a receptionist! Not a high level VP or anything! 

I'm 48 and I still really like my husband.  I'm still attracted to him, I still like spending time with him.  From talking to most of my girlfriends, I don't get that they feel the same way.  They prefer to vacation with their moms/sisters/girlfriends, they never spend time together when they're both home (one in the living room watching TV, the other in the bedroom playing on the computer). They never go to eat/movies/out for drinks just the two of them.  Are some people truly happy like that?

And, how much of a difference would a masters in poly sci make as far as finding a job/salary difference.

My husband and I sometimes travel with other couples and rent a condo/small house.  We always split the price equally on the place we rent but when we get there, it's always so awkward to decide who gets the master bedroom.  The bed is usually bigger and there is usually an en suite bathroom. Any suggestions? It's almost always just one other couple at a time, not several.  And not the always same couple every time so "taking turns" doesn't help"

My husband says the guys at his work constantly complain about their wives.  That they have to beg them to go hunting or fishing all weekend.  That they've gained weight.  That they never want to have sex, etc.  My husband says he feels like the odd man out because he never chimes in and when they ask him about it he says he has no real complaints.  He said these men are not exactly underwear models and all have beer bellies. He said they brag that they don't change diapers or clean the house. And that they want to go hunting and fishing every single weekend, leaving the wife at home with the kids.  My female married friends will gripe every now and then that their husband snores, but for the most part we don't complain nonstop about our husbands.

Would you say you have a hobby? If so what is it? Also, does your husband have a hobby?

Because of my age I am not interested in spending $50,000 on a 4 year degree. But I'd be interested in a 2 year degree. The problem is, all the 2 year degrees I look at have 1-2 years of prerequisites before you start the 2 year degree. HOW is that a 2 year degree?? And the 2 year degrees that don't have said prereqs make $13/hour upon completion. And don't anyone say Medical Sonographer, Rad Tech, Surgical Tech, etc because they all have 2 years of prereqs before starting the 2 year degree.

I'm employed part time at a smallish (15 employee) office. I've been here 3 years. The first year I worked 20 hours/week and the last two years I work 30/hours per week. I get no benefits. Considering what I do, I'm probably maxed out as far as a fair salary for the area I live. This is what I want to know, would you continue to give a "maxed out" employee small raises to show appreciation for loyalty? For cross training on other desks to cover for people when they're out. Or would you be willing to possibly offer something else as a token of appreciation like paid holidays, or limited PTO. I like my job, but there is no room to "advance" in my office. I'm wondering if I stay here forever if I should never expect another raise or any modified benefits.

Should a part time employee who has been with a company several years get some benefits? Not a full package, but maybe paid holidays? A few paid sick days, a few paid vacation days. Not necessarily a full health/dental/401k package. But SOMETHING to let them know they're valued after several years of service.

My husband's aunt invited us to an engagement party for her son (my husband's cousin). The invitation lists the two places they are registered. I'm up to date on etiquette enough to know you should't do that. But since she did do that does that mean we should bring a gift? I feel like if she wanted to make it a gift giving event she should have called it a shower.

My daughter is in a college chemistry class. She's made 100 on both exams so far and loves the class. Many of her classmates are struggling. Would it be appropriate to offer to tutor them for a fee even though she's enrolled in the class and hasn't finished it.

Does AA actually teach tools to help you stop drinking, or just tell you to surrender to a higher power and "let go and let God"?

My husband and I are taking my son on a small weekend trip for his 21st birthday. My Mom came over the other day and put a check in my purse for me to find, it was a little contribution to the expenses of the trip that she wanted to surprise me with. The next day I cleaned out my purse and didn't see the check and I must have thrown it away. Today she asked me if I got the check (it's been several days and I hadn't acknowledged it). I told her no and we determined that I must have accidentally thrown it away. I apologized over and over, I feel like an idiot. She seems irked at me. "I guess that's what I get for trying to surprise you!" And has not offered to give me another check. I don't NEED the check, I booked the trip based on what I could afford, but is it odd that she's not offering to write another check? It's not like it was cash that I accidentally threw away.