CONTEST! 10 POINTS! CAN U THINK OF MORE JOKES THAN ME?
I've got 25 jokes think U can beat that? bet not, and no coping and only
non cussing jokes, my 10 year old friend does like to read funny jokes too you know,
A woman invited some people to dinner.
At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said,
'Would you like to say the blessing?'
'I wouldn't know what to say,' the girl replied.
'Just say what you hear Mommy say,' the woman answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said,
'Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?',
A woman called her doctor to complain about her husband's snoring. "Is there anything you can do?"
"Well, there is one operation that will cure your husband, but it's rather expensive. $1,000 plus $450 a month for 36 months."
"Omy gosh " exclaimed the woman, "that's like leasing a sports car!"
"Hmm," the doctor murmured. "Too obvious, eh?"
why do barbers make good drivers?
because they know all the short cuts,
ben's dad was building a pine bookcase, and ben was
watching and occasionally helping.
"what are the holes for?" ben asked.
"they're knot holes", said his dad.
"what are they, then, if they're not holes?" said ben.
Where do geologists go for entertainment?
to rock concerts,
how did benjamin franklin discover electricity?
it came to him in a flash,
what kind of person thinks bath is electric because it has a plug?
an idiot, thats who!
dumb warning on back of joke book;
"beware, word tricks and limericks
can make you or your friend look like a
bit of a fool too,
why is a classroom like an old car?
cuz it full of nuts, and has a crank at the
front, ha ha ha
did you hear about the florist who had
two kids?
one's a budding gunius and the other's
a blooming idiot,
what do you get if you cross a hedgehog
with a giraffe?
a long-necked toothbrush,
why does a stork stand on one leg?
because it would fall over if it lifted the other one,
what's an american cat's favorite car?
a catillac,
my dog saw a sign that said "wet paint"
so he did!
whats a snail?
a slug with a crash helmet,
what did the dumb ghost name his pet tiger?
spot,
how did the police scare the bugs away?
they called for the S.W.A.T. team,
what crawls and wears uniforms and helmets?
army ants,
why was the firefly flashing on and off?
his light was on the blink,
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I'm standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet aren't empty!".
how do you drowned a blondie?
drop something shiny in the water,
(tarzan speaking)
me sit on flor, mom in kitchen she make meatlaof, eww,
she sit in char, me replace phone with remote, meatlaof catch on fire,
mom try to dial 911 but only change channel to discovery........funny,
me sit on flor, mom sit in char, mom go to bathroom, me go to char,
replace remote with phone, mom come back, try to change channel but she dial 911..........funny,
knock knock
who's there
enterupting cow
enterupting cow wh,
MOOOOOOOO!
knock knock,
who's there,
but,
but who,
no it's "but what" you idiot!
hahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and you have to type every one uf YOUR
jokes or you won't win.
if you won't put anything on here or
just "can't be bothered" or your gonna say my jokes are lame (which some of them are) then............
DON"T ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!