As a Parent is this over reacting?

I was at work and my husband was home with the kids, my daughter is 15 years old, she asked my husband if she could go to the park, he said yes, but be home in an hour, he asked her if she was meeting anyone at the park she said no. She did not have a cell phone on her at the time.
at this time it was 4 30 pm
at 6 30 pm my husband goes to the park and does not see her there, and drives around in the neighborhood looking for her, and could not find her. My husband calls me at work asking for more of her friends phone numbers and asked if i could come home at 7 pm.

none of her friends have seen her, no one has heard from her, there is a high school play at intermission they made an announcement anyone has seen her.
no one has..we drove to the park and asked if any one has seen her and the people there said no.
about 8 15 we called the police...and started to make a report...
about 8 45 pm she showed up at home..mean time a father calls and said they said they saw her walking in the woods with some guy and another girl.

we asked were she was she said she met up with some friends at the park and went to there house..and why didn't she call to let us know..

some of her friends said we over reacted..as a parent i don't think we did..what is your thoughts thanks for your help

2011-04-11T05:52:55Z

Thank you everyone for your answers, things were so much different when i was a kid. I made a plea on her facebook page if anyone knew were she was to please have her call home..She hardly goes out and me and her father want her to go out and have fun with her friends, she will never get these teenage years back again..but we want her to be responsible too,,All would of been ok when she was at her friends house if she would of just called..

2011-04-11T05:59:50Z

oh she is so grounded, from the computer, phone, and tv..for 2 weeks

poggles7892011-04-11T05:36:48Z

Favorite Answer

definitely not!

I think you are quite right to be upset, she should have called. It was inconsiderate and selfish of her not to think that maybe her parents were worried about her. If she was planning on being out longer, she should AT LEAST have called... but probably she should have come home at the time your husband set.

I hope you explain to her how worried you were and how she needs to consider other people before she does things like that =/ Don't worry if her friends think you're over-reacting - teenagers always think parents are over-reacting when they prevent them doing exactly what they want lol

patricia2011-04-11T05:58:17Z

No, you are not over reacting. She was asked to be home in an hr and she did not express having a problem with that so surely you would expect that she would follow through. The fact that she met up with friends and went to their house only makes what she did sound worse....houses have phones, why didn't she call. In this day and age you have to be alert and concerned all the time, Anything can happen to anyone and its not limited to age, gender or time of day, its just the way things are and to not be concerned would be negligent. Of course her friends think you over reacted they are at that age where everything bad happens to other people...until it doesn't and then its too late. Good for you for being concerned!

Anonymous2011-04-11T05:45:10Z

Her friends are idiots.
You had given her leeway to go to the park - alone - for an hour. You asked her for an honest answer if she was meeting anyone, she said no. What you got was FOUR HOURS AND FIFTEEN minutes of no idea where she was, who she was with, and if she was going to come home. For all you knew, she could have been thrown in the back of a van or hurt or god knows what else.

Considering she didn't give you an honest answer and is treating this like it's "no big deal" (I assume she told you that her friends told her that you were overreacting), I think a punishment is in order. Definitely don't trust her to go anywhere by herself for a while.

*Add:
Jeez, just two weeks? You are way more lenient than my parents would have been.

Me2011-04-11T05:38:16Z

I'm not a parent but I think that you did NOT overreact at all. Had she been my child, I would've had the same reaction. She should have called and let you know she'd be out later and should have let you know who she was going to be with. She needs to realize that all kinds of horrific things happen to people everyday and that you and your husband were just worried. Once the whole situation calms down a bit, I think the three of you should sit down together and have a talk and explain to her exactly why her behavior the other night was unacceptable. Let her know that you two were panicked, having no idea where she was or why no one else knew either. I would think that at 15 years old she would realize that, but it's possible that it slipped her mind.

Feral_Timelord2011-04-11T05:36:52Z

You are not over reacting at all. What if something had happened to her. OK she and her friends knew they were safe and the least she could have done was let you know that she was ok.

Its her actions that created the situation and she needs to learn that, you go good parents.

Also good parents question themselves, so its natural that you are checking things out.

Next time arrange a compromise with her, and if she doesn;t stick to it, make sure she knows what the repercussions are.

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