I'm straight, but the possibly still exists that I COULD choose to change. All I have to do is find a nice, caring woman that likes women and start dating her. I might not be sexually attracted to her (yet), but her niceness and caring nature towards me could be enough reason to love her and stay with her. I then could make the choice even not to consider men sexually ever again. I could start seeing her niceness and caring nature in a sexual way should I get used to having sex with her and focusing less on the fact she's not a man. Why cant gays do this with the opposite sex?
Anonymous2014-06-24T15:26:18Z
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But they can change but most gay people dont think they have a problem so there is no need to change. People have been turned to the gay lifestyle because of something in their childhood that made their thinking wrong. Every gay person has either been abused or come from a dysfunctional family. How does a pedophile get attracted to a child? Are they born that way? No they mostly have been abused as a child. Does society say its ok to be a pedophile because thats what they feel inside of their mind? No they say its wrong for an adult to be attracted to a child. For a pedophile they would need counseling and rehabilitation to be healed of their perverted thinking. Gay people dont want to deal with their problem so they made it a lifestyle. Just wait for pedophiles to group together. Its all the Easy way out- dont admit you have a problem just say its my feeling (feelings are always right- not).
It's a complicated situation, and each person is an individual. But still, it has some answers.
Scientifically, there seems to be a difference between sexual attraction of men and women. When they hook up equipment to monitor sexual arousal (eye dilation, heart rate, breathing rate, and to measure wetness in women and erections in men), women respond to images of relationships - sexual or non-sexual. Seeing a man and woman OR two women OR two men doing something sexually loving is a turn-on. But so is seeing two men walking hand in hand on the beach! It doesn't involve any woman, but they are aroused by the 'relationship'. There is little to no response of seeing a hunky guy or an attractive woman. Straight men are aroused quickly by an image of an attractive woman and not at all by an attractive guy. Same for sexual situations between man and woman, and sometimes two women. But there's no response to man and man sexual OR romantic situations. For gay men, it's similar but opposite. There is no response to the romantic situations, unless it involves two guys. Seeing two women in a sexual situation does nothing, same for a man and woman for the most part.
Obviously, some gay guys - especially in the past - have married and fathered children. They are often able to perform. But usually sex is very rare in these situations - they feel little to no attraction to a spouse. They still desire other males, even if they don't act on it. Most who come out feel as if they have been living a lie, keeping a terrible dark secret for years. Many have prayed and begged to be able to change, and have tried to change for years.
Some women, in the other hand, are able to be satisfied and happy, and sexual in an opposite sex relationship and then they go on to be the same way in a lesbian relationship. Or vice-versa. This would go along with research, and confirms the idea that you (and some other women) could 'choose'. That's not the story of all women, but it would appear many are that way.
A few gays and/or lesbians seem to have changed by dealing with the hurt and pain of severe abuse, often sexual. While this type of change is rare, it does seem to happen for a limited number.
There's also evidence that by observing toddlers, researchers can predict with about 95% accuracy which ones will be gay as adults. Is it something genetic that happens at conception? Is it something that happens during fetal development? No one knows for certain, but it seems pretty obvious it's never a 'choice' like deciding if I want to live in New York or California.
I don't get why people are being so aggressive on this question when there's proof which you can google of gay people changing to straight. It happens it isn't impossible! It's like straights turning gay it happens whats the big deal?
I mean, I actually just don't give two shits what you think and am going to keep dating the same sex because I like dating the same sex. Nobody wants to change their entire lives and repress themselves. We have no interest in changing ourselves to meet the standards of a few people willing to pretend they speak for God or are themselves Gods. And even if such God were to go up right in front of me and tell me to stop dating men, such God is no God of mine.
Put up or shut up, if you feel that you could live a lie for 30, 40, 50 years go ahead and do it; my guess is you'll get really tired of the pretense really quick. Why should I change myself ( a person with whom I'm very comfortable) to make people I don't know or care about feel better