How do you deal with Step Children?

let your wife be the one to put her foot down about the money...sorry, but they won't listen to you bec you're not their dad.

mom must remain firm...don't listen to the whining. Hopefully you 2 have decided that they leave the nest when they graduate. You have the right to expect some privacy in your marriage, esp. since he's old enough to be on his own...and she almost is. Sister will hopefully go on to college...sounds like a smart girl with a future.

support your wife and stand by her. help her remain firm. she's given them 18 long yrs...long enough.

I think your last two sentences pretty much already answer the question. They may be assuming they can have what they see other teens and friends getting, and knowing nothing about where money comes from and how much things cost, they just assume you are not giving them thses things just because you don't want to. It isn't a problem of step children, it's just the way a lot of teens are. My kids were the same way and we just hung in there saying no, no and no again. They learned after they got jobs and had to pay their own way, which takes a while. All you can do is talk to them, maybe show them the actual figures of your bills and income, encourage them to get a job so "then you'll be able to buy all the stuff you want for yourselves" LOL. Some things like class trips to Disneyland are memories for them (maybe) and might be worth doing. Try to find ways for them to earn some money for those things. but not the car or the trip to Hawaii. Some parents really do give their kids things like this for graduation and such = who knows how they afford it.Anyway,hang in their. You must be doing a good job with them if the grades are so good and they're involved in wholesome activities. a side note about the son - he'll grow up, just give it time (but encourage him to find a job - any job).

Well the sound just like any other spoiled kids whether you are there biological father or not. Seems like you just need to deal with like all other good parents do and encourage them and teach them. Dint let them use anything against you because you are not there first father and if they do. Have your wife explain to them that you are part of her and therefore part of the family. Inviting Jesus into your life and reading the Bible always work to.-God Bless hope I helped even a little.

Guess what? This has nothing to do with what they want because all kids want exactly what they are asking. All kids BS and it sounds like YOUR stepdaughter is an over achiever. Be proud of them and let them be kids. Your hostilities don't count and will result in a very unhappy ending for all of you. You may be the problem in this matter and if you are change it. You are the parent and the adult so address your issues.

that has nothing to do with step children.. all kids want cars.. and trips to disney. steer your grad toward a job and/or college. grants of course. as for your senior .. a 4.0 aint shabby. she is a princess. and with that brain i would be nice to her..because she could do very well in life if she keeps those grades up at a college somewhere. give the kids a break step dad.

They are at those ages and are coming to important and scary times in their lives..they are too young to fully understand how much stuff costs since they have never been out on their own. I am not sure if your wife spoiled them when they were younger, but it seems that they expect this. Just calmly respect them but let them know that with the economy so bad it is impossible for you guys to have them endugances...but they both are old enough to have jobs even if they are in school. So let them know if they safe up for it then they can gladly go. Good luck...remember this too shall pass..they are at Terrible ages..I am young and know in a few years it does get better...

GOOD LUCK!!!

Hm. I have two stepsons who are 6 and 10 years younger than me, respectively. I have a decent relationship with one, and I do not have a relationship with the other one. I am a stepchild, also. I have a good relationship with my stepmother, but my relationship with my stepfather is not so good. Whether the relationship is good is largely a crapshoot, it seems.

When the "children" are older adolescents, the stepparent is at best a friend, not a parent. Your wife is going to have to deal with them herself. You'll just be the bad guy if you say anything negative to them. That's one of the reasons I don't get along with my stepfather; he loves to give advice that is not applicable to me. LOL

Get a new attitude, bud.

They are just what you said -- CHILDREN!

You proably should not have married until they were out of the house fully if you are not prepared to conduct yourself and your attitude with loving kindness, and in an adult fashion.

Soudns like you need some counseling sessions on how to improve your parenting skills.

THe best way to deal with step children is to let the parent take the lead and you back up your spouse.

good luck to you kind sir...tell them to go to their rooms to think about it, better yet, tell them to sit at the dining room table until they appreciate what is givin to them...kids are lame, they don't get it that they aren't owed anything. i have a sdaughter who is very, very smart, and manipulative...but good. so, the best way is to be on the same page as the parent, cause no matter what, you are the s parent and they don't give a fu ck and the married one doesn't either.

Tell 'em to go ask their Daddy, maybe they will move in with him. Otherwise, kick the 18 year old out and tell his sister she's next if she doesn't shut the hell up.