Why do some women think that being a wife or mommy is what makes them unique?

Question

I just read a question that asked what is the one cool thing that makes you you? And someone said that she was the mommy of 3beautiful kids.Maybe what makes her, her is her cool laugh or pretty blond hair or funny toes. We are all special in some way before we are wives or mothers. We have all of these cool thing so we can be wives and mothers, not the other way around, right? My granddad told me once that you have to be a person, before you can raise a person, and I have lived by that.
Does anyons else think that it is wrong for women to only value themselves by the fact that they are a wife and mother?
I am a wife and mother of 2 beautiful son's, a beautiful daughter-in-law, and girlfriend-in-law, and Noni to two of the most beautiful grandkids on the planet.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It's good to be proud to be a mother, but I really feel sorry for women whose whole lives are just about their kids.  That's all they do, all they talk about, all they think about.  What will become of them when all the kids are grown?

moma · Answer

Yes, in a way it is wrong but when a person categorize themselves as a mother it seems as if they are placing an emphasis on how proud they are to be a mother, the pride they take in seeing that they help created a life that to them is perfect. Sometimes people get stuck in a rut of identifying themselves as only one thing even though they are so much more. Everyone has amazing qualities in them and they should express and celebrate those just as much as they celebrate the fact that they are mothers.

Silva · Answer

You cannot say what makes someone else unique, that is up to them! Maybe that lady who said that acknowledges those other things about herself but does not feel that those things make her who she is. I personally do not feel defined by my children but everyone is different and it is not wrong or right to feel that way. You cant apply your own standards to someone Else's life. Also, just because a mother values herself for being a mother doesn't mean she doesn't recognize and value other things about herself. It is not necessarily a lack of ones own identity to feel this way.Actually every thing about you together makes you you!

blkrose65 · Answer

Because they find value in caring for their husbands and children. For some reason in our (american/western)culture, getting married and raising children (creating and maintaining a family, the core of ALL civiliized societies) has been devalued.  If you're a mother then you KNOW you made sacrifices for your children.
Maybe she's proud of how they've grown and she loves them and she's content! Is that a problem?

somebrowning · Answer

Because maybe in these womens' cultural circles or families it is the most important factor.  For them it is possibly the highest achievement the women of their culture  can attain among them.

goldie · Answer

i dont think theres anything wrong with that, shes proud of that, i am too, i think its much better answer than the "beautiful blond hair" answer, its much more meaningfull, i think most would agree

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Why do some women think that being a wife or mommy is what makes them unique?

6 Answers