Do I stand my ground to protect my son or give in to my wife and mother in law???

I would suggest that you first talk to Peter, and ask him what the hell is going on. He is your son after all, and you have every right to. If something happened which was accidental, I'm sure you can work through this.

If Peter is guilty or something more, like an abuse situation, then why did the Mother in Law banish you? She's trying to protect Peter? I don't like the sound of this situation at all, but I would speak to the Mother in Law, and Peter in a public place like a park, and see just what took place. Your wife is more concerned for the safety of her boy than the feelings of her Mother, believe it or not. She will side for the benefit of her son, though it may be difficult to do.

Definitely stand your ground. This is the best way to prevent future abuse from your brother in law especially since your son is only 2 1/2. He can't speak up as to what's been done. If Peter has hit or whatever it is he's done, chances are he'll do it again. 2 year olds are very curious little people and like to explore. Some adults especially those without children have no patients when it comes to other people's children. I don't see why your wife would want to take him back there even though it is her family. My child's welfare would come first no matter what.

If you do not protect your son then who will. I am disappointed with your wife and m-i-l reaction to this. Does this man live in your mother in laws house or will he be visiting while you son is there? If he doesn't live there then perhaps you can set a rule to where he does not visit when your son is there. However, why didn't you MIL say or do anything when it happened? Why did they not tell you? Was the man playing with your son or was he mad at him when it happend? If they were playing then why not talk to you about it? You may even want to get your son checked out. This happened to a friends child not too long ago at day care. The little girl was 18months. She picked her up and nobody said anything to her about the little girl being hurt. She too was favoring one arm. She took her to the ER. The doc refer ed to it as nurse maids syndrome. (basically her elbow was dislocated) It was given that name because it had been associated to nurse maids pulling a patient out of there bed/chair etc. by the arm and yanking the elbow . Do not EVER second guess protecting your child. You are doing what a parent should do! Your wife should be supporting the decision.

I feel its good you wish to Protect your son. Every Good father should be there for there children.

Don't have the whole story but the brother and son may have been rough housing it and as things go when doing so someone sooner or later does get hurt many times on accident. In your Message above I didn't hear either way.

And If you didn't hear either way maybe you should go to your inlaws tuck your tail and ask what happened. Maybe it was inocent play you know...

On the other hand is there more going on between you and your wife and inlaws than you've mentioned?

You will have these folks as inlaws for life weather you like it or not. If its truly a case of abuse stay away and if it happens again call the proper athorities and report it. Nothing worse than anyone abusing a inocent person young or old either way...

Stand your ground. Trust your gut-- you always hear people speaking about 'mother's intuition', but rarely is anything said about 'father's intuition'. If you love and protect your child to the extent that you seem to, by your asking of this question, then I'd be inclined to say that your instincts (and common sense) are working just fine and you should heed your own advice.

As a parent, your job is to protect your child at all costs-- even if it means royally pissing off the in laws or any other adult. Adults will get over it (and if they DON'T, they're really just overgrown children and shouldn't bear the responsibility of watching other children anyway!), your child is your primary concern.

Sounds like Uncle Peter either disciplined him more harshly than necessary or was playing a bit too rough and may have pulled his shoulder out of socket a bit (happens frequently- commonly called a 'nursemaid's elbow', but easily avoided by NOT ever pulling on a child's arm). If he & his mother don't have the sense to own up to the mistake and choose to get all upset over you doing your parental JOB, then it sounds like you and your family may be better off without them until they grow up...

Good luck with all of this- it doesn't sound like a pleasant scenario...

You are being a good father!!! You need to get a real answer from the brother in law who still lives with Mom.... It could have been a total accident, but you and your wife are owed a full explanation. Have you taken your son for x-rays, he could have difficulty with his arm later on so you should have it checked out. If it were my son, I would not be letting him go back there without me being with him. I have grown children and grandchildren and if anything happened to any of them I would demand a full explanation. Don't they realize that honesty is the best policy? What would they be trying to cover up? Does your brother in law have a problem with dealing with children and have an uncontrollable temper....why not just say the truth and get it over with. Why would your wife want anything less than the total truth? Is she trying to cover up something for her brother, and why???? There needs to be more Dads in todays world who place their children first. Why would your mother in law banish you from her house??? There is a lot of "covering up" going on here. I am sure, being a grandparent myself; that she loves your son beyond life itself, so why would she banish his Dad who is obviously protecting the child. Your wife is really stuck in the middle of this, but she is obligated to you first. When a couple marries, they have to turn toward each other and respect each other, and basically ignore outside influences; especially when they are negative. Best of luck to you all and I hope your little guy grows up to be a wonderful dad in his time. Have a good day!

Yes!!!!!!!! If your concerned about your son and your gut instinct is telling you that he is not in a safe place go with it. Its better to be wrong and have to apologize for it than to be right and your son possibly being hurt. This is the safety of your child. I do not know your brother in laws situation but why is a 35 year old man still at home???? Good luck you sound like a great DAD.

Under NO circumstances allow your child to be alone anymore with either the grandmother or your brother-in-law. Please. Take this very seriously. You must report this incident to the police. Just do it. I did not report similar abuse once. Two weeks later I saw the front page picture of the same baby. Her mother's boyfriend had picked the baby up by her ankles, whipped her around and bashed her head against a brick fireplace in anger. Was that blunt enough? The law requires that you report this incidence.

You should protect your son. It sounds to me like Peter is a child abuser. Does the mother-in-law know what he did to your son? If she doesn't she will be very defensive of Peter if you do tell her. You might also consider letting Peter know that you know what he did and that if it happens again you will go to the police.

Despite the fact that your relationship with your

mother-in-law is suffering due to this action, I

commend you for not only standing up to what

is right, but putting your son's safety before

other concerns.

I would however not punish the grandmother for

the actions of her adult son. Have your wife stay

with your son during visits, however talk to the

child's uncle too. It could be that the situation

that cased your son to be injured was accidental.

But in either case, you are doing the right thing as

a man but more importantly as a father.