My wife doesn't care about sex. She has Interstitial Cystitis?

Interstitial cystitis (commonly abbreviated to "IC") is a urinary bladder disease of unknown cause characterised by pelvic and intense bladder pain, urinary frequency (as often as every 10 minutes), and pain with urination. It is not unusual for patients to experience nocturia and pain with sexual intercourse. IC is also known as painful bladder syndrome (PBS), particularly outside of the USA.

IC affects men and women of all cultures, socioeconomics and ages. Although the disease previously was believed to be a condition of menopausal women, growing numbers of men and women are being diagnosed in their twenties and younger. IC is not a rare condition. Early research suggested that IC prevalence ranged from 1 in 100,000 to 5.1 in 1,000 of the general population. New epidemiological data released in 2006 by Dr. Matt Rosenberg now suggests that up to 12% of women may have early symptoms of IC.

It is not unusual for patients to have been misdiagnosed with a variety of other conditions, including: overactive bladder, urethritis, urethral syndrome, trigonitis, prostatitis and other generic terms used to describe frequency/urgency symptoms in the urinary tract.

♠

Interstitial cystitis is a chronic condition without a known cause. There are decent treatment options and a urologist can give you the options. That having been said, it is important to address the possibility that this is in fact a UTI. You say that it happened after having sex for the first time - this can happen with UTIs. There are several bacteria that cause UTIs that may not be picked up by conventional testing and need special tests. You could have one of these and results would come back "negative". Another very real possibility you should have checked out is an STD. Many STD (including chlamydia and gonnorhea) can cause symptoms of cystitis - have these checked out, especially since you had a new sex partner. Lastly, your symptoms might be caused by a yeast infection or similar infection - if you're not sure, see your doctor. Good luck!

Interstitial Cystitis And Sex

I'm sorry to hear of your predicament. I can only tell you that I know that interstitial cystitis is incredibly painful and it must be so depressing to know that it can't be cured.

If you love her, stick by her and make sure that she sees specialists regarding pain management and depression. She may be afraid that sex will aggravate it. I do not understand though why she wouldn't at least want the closeness of touch or other types of sex rather than intercourse.

I think I would approach her in a peaceful and loving and safe environment and tell her that you love her and miss her. Ask her gently to tell you about her fears regarding the IC and your life together.

Lastly, marriage counseling may be in order with individual counseling for her for her feelings of depression and possible body image issues.

God bless and good luck!

She's lucky to have someone who wants to find ways to please her during this difficult time. You seem to do a lot for her and I'm sure she's grateful.

I'm also sure she's embarrased about it and it's probably hard for her to face you knowing you want sex and she's scared to get hurt by having it. She probably doesn't know what to say to you so instead she remains quiet about it. Don't take that as being cold, she just isn't sure of herself right now.

http://www.medicinenet.com/interstitial_cystitis/a...

At this website, she could find a support group or ask questions, and of course anything you need to know about the disease is here too. Although I didn't see anything on sex and the disease at all. But of course it does talk about pelvic pain.

Goodl luck and blessed be.

You have said your wife does not care about sex. There may be two things going on at the same time. Yes certainly the pain associated with her condition makes intercourse difficult but she should be willing and indeed asking you about other ways you can both have pleasure.

I wish you well.

Oh honey I am so sorry, if you want you can message me through my email.

I have ic also..I bet my boyfriend feels the same way. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years now..I the first year we were together I loved having sex and being physical. Then I started getting sick I was in and out of the doctors every other week it seemed. I had my operation and i was diagonosed with ic. It hurt so bad to have sex that I had lost all interest. My boyfriend and I arent physically other than holding hands and kissing and hugging. Sometimes I feel so bad for him because I know that he is a man and he has needs. He seems to deal with it well I think it has been a good 6 months since the last time we were intimate together. Sometimes I think about it and I feel really bad and then I make jokes about how my pee pee is broken. Its so hard sometimes. She is just really depressed, it should get better, if not you should suggest that she takes a valuim 30 minutes before sex thats what my doctor told me to do to make it less painful. I hope things get better. I am in the same boat, except i am the reverse roals.

well the disease is not curable but there are treatments to alleviate the pain. i will recommend you to see the web sites i posted and learn more about the diseases. so far i found out the it has to do with the bladder and it can cause pain in the pelvis. she might be afraid that once she is at peak point she might pee because she cant really retain much water. but there are also different ways she can pleasure you as far as pleasuring her its up to her she is the one under her own skin i say talk to a sexual specialist doctor who can help.ask the social worker that is why she/he is there to help her live a normal life.

I have IC and it is painful to have sex. But sex should not be that only thing holding your marriage together. Talk to her and see if it is the actual intercourse or the orgasms. If it is just the intercourse that is painful. Try oral sex it is just as satisfying for both of you. I know it sounds gross but ask her about anal sex. She should be willing to try anything if your marriage is in trouble. Just know that this is painful for her also, have a little sympathy it can go along way

Personally, I think intimacy is essential in a loving relationship. Having this disease may mean she needs more time to get aroused. Run a bubble bath for her, give her a back rub, romance her, make her feel desirable. There are so many different ways of pleasuring one another - oral sex comes to mind - that you should both be able to find satisfaction without it being painful to her.