Need suggestions on my 9y/o behavior?

Sounds like there may be more than one problem here. First off, I would take into consideration that he's bored. I used to get really bored in class because the work was too easy sometimes. Moving him up a grade or re-testing for gifted may be a good idea.

Secondly, kids will act deviant because something is bothering them. Most kids (even if the parents teach them) don't know how to properly tell someone that "something's up". He's probably upset about something in his life that he's not outright telling you. You should sit down and ask him. I have a 9yr old step daughter who goes in waves of misbehaving at school and I think it is directly related to her little sister living at our house all the time while she is split 50-50 between mom's house and ours. Her acting out at school is her way of telling us that she is unhappy about her mom and dad not being married and living together. When my husband and I do ANYTHING with our daughter when my step daughter isn't here she gets really jealous and usually gets into trouble at school for a few days because she won't talk about it, even when we sit down with her to talk.

Any how, I would suggest that you look deeper and figure out what's really bothering your son. Also, challenge him more. It sounds like he's already figured out that he can slack off and still get good grades (which can be problematic in the future). Maybe you should ask about putting him in gifted or moving him up a grade. If his school says no, consider other options with him. There's nothing worse than being bored and being treated like you're not as smart as you actually are at school.

Sounds like he's the victim of the kids in his class. My son was exactly like the way you describe yours. At about 10 though, his friends began picking on him because he was so smart, and always doing the right thing. They called him teacher's pet and all the other wonderful things kids call each other. What I did was keep reminding my son that it doesn't help anyone if he shows the "bad boy" side of himself. I told him the other kids were jealous that he was so smart. I asked if there was some way to settle him down in class again. His answer was for the teacher not to point out how well he does in class, and not call on him so much to answer questions. As to the antics of backtalking and getting out of seat, he was told he'd lose time with his favorite thing, whatever that is, for everytime it happened. I also told my son when it got really bad, if it continued, I'd come to school and sit with him everyday til it stopped, because I knew he could be a good boy and do what he was told. It worked, but it took time.

Welcome to Pre-puberty. The hormones in your son are making him a little distracted and I would lay odds he isn't sleeping well either. His body is preparing for the journey to manhood and believe it or not the hormones are causing him to suffer mood swings, forgetfulness and a personality change. All of this is normal. You can help by making sure he sleeps at least 8 hrs each night (try a Hemi sleep CD), make sure he is drinking 8-8oz glasses of water a day, check his diet (you can confirm what he needs at: http://www.mypyramid.gov/). Some children need more "fats" at this time because their brain activity is amped, try avocado, fish, real butter & eggs(in moderation) to balance his nutritive cravings. Kids start as early as 8 craving mass ammounts of chocolate and pushing parents affections away. You need to remind him you love him-sit and talk about his day, take walks - whatever it takes to help him focus. If he learns now that you are available he will be more responsive later. I am sure you talk to him but just make a few extra efforts - he is treading on unsure waters and is afraid you won't want him if he changes. Pick up some books at the library on pre-puberty and puberty in boys - it is going to be a bumpy road- but with patience, persistance, and lots of love you will both come through this fine. You will see as his confidence grows his grades will come back up and your worries will be less. Good Luck!

You know I did the same thing at that age and the reason behind it all was boredom.

I was too far ahead of all of my classmates academically and since I was no longer being challenged, I acted out. I still had better grades than my peers, but I was getting sent to the office on a bi weekly basis.

If he tested that high, maybe the regular curriculum isn't cutting it for him. Talk to his teacher about doing some kind of independent study which will put his work load at a higher level and maybe it will bring his focus back. It worked for me!

Is he trying to be class clown to make friends? My son, 7th grader, is a little immature and says things out loud in class to try to make the other kids laugh and therefore be friendly to him.

Why is he misbehaving? What does he say?

Is he bored stiff?

Just a few thoughts. I'm sure he's in sports (?). Perhaps he could get in karate for the self-discipline?

There might be some sort of underlying problem he isn't telling you about. Maybe a school counselor can help. He seems very intelligent, and fully capable of doing the work, maybe he's bored in his class?

My son is showing similar behavior. We have sought the advice of a child psychologist. It's helping. I suggest you do the same.

Have him tested for ADD, ADHD. The school will do this free. When it all comes back negative, tell him he has no more excuses and he needs to settle down or he's going to be one very unhappy little man. Stay consistent on consequences for behavior,both at home and at school. Something is going on with him and he needs work it out.

ask your son if hes bored the classes..... if the work is to easy he may be getting bored and goofing off that's what my son did...good luck

Bribe him.. It works I know