Why are parents today so hesitant to enforce strict (not necessarily harsh) discipline on their children?

I am not hesitant to enforce rules and boundaries. My husband and I are responsible for our children - we take that very seriously.

It seems to me that to many parent's are week minded and believer all the crap about how it's bad to discipline there children! My daughter is 5 almost 6 and let me tell you if I ask her to do something she doesn't ask why she just does it. I just cant believe the way kids talk to there parents now days when I was a kid if I'd said some of the things these kids say I would have had my mouth busted!

Discipline does not hurt kids in anyway it just helps them to grow up to be good hard working honest people! When parents start to see that again this world will be a much better place!

My problem with lax parenting stemmed from my first husband, who was very abusive to me.

The children learned bad anger management and manipulation from watching their father. He often counteracted my parenting the children by either telling them they didn't have to do what I said or by accusing me of coddling the children when I wanted to spend time with them instead of him.

By the time I divorced him, I had two royal brats on my hands and no clue how to fix it.

It was by the patient guidance of my second husband that I learned how to give my kids proper boundaries and teach them how to respect and even empathize with other people.

I know that other people are hurting in their parenting because they are in a domestic violence situation. I know that no excuse is a good excuse for bad parenting, but the awareness needs to be made so that there can be help for the children so they can be brought up to be functioning adults.

It's very easy to look in from the outside and ask, "Why don't they control their children?!?" It's harder to look at the source of the problem and then step in to help.

Everyone criticized my parenting. Nobody asked why my eye was black.

I left my abuser without any support from those who were quick to judge me. I have been doing well and my current husband is a godsend. My children and I are lucky. Many others are not.

I think too many people don't think before having children and REALLY considering whether that's really want they want in life. Having kids is of course a major commitment and you don't get a break. And I think a lot of parents just get overwhelmed. Before they had kids, they didn't think about how they would have to constantly be supervising their kids and enforcing discipline. So some of them just shut down and choose not to parent.

i tend to agree with you

I have an 8yo son that we had after 6 years of trying - some parents would spoil an only child like mad in that situation

but our son was difficult in his younger years and so firm handling was the order of the day. he was diagnosed with mild aspergers syndrome and they need consistancy consistancy and more of the same - even more than any other child

i find that now he is 8yo and has very few signs of that condition now - he is well disciplined and he respects me for it - and is in the top group for everything at school and has a circle of friends too. his school reports are glowing and now we have the discipline and respect in place - we do have a lot of fun with him as he has a similar sense of humour to me BUT i am NOT afriad to say to him - 'no that was inappropriate' or 'once or twice is funny BUT NOT AFTER 26 TIMES'

some parents are trying to treat their kids like friends and dont want to do the less pleasant side of parenting - that of laying down the law because they want to be 'liked' by the child (which they are not building on a strong foundation of respect but just by pandering to the wants of an already spoilt child)

i speak not as a grandparent but as a parent and former practicing school teacher too (actually some of the worst behaved kids often have parents who are teachers too surprisingly enough)

i was in one school once when a pupil (whom i had been warned about as being a difficult pupil) came to me and said 'i dont think this is a good school miss.' I had to be professional and remain ;neutral' so i asked her what she would change if it was up to her to make it a 'good' school. Her answer surprised me - she said that they ought to be a lot stricter! that from a child who would push against the boundaries set in that school at every opportunity and you may think at a more lax school she was getting her way more than at a strict schooll!!

the moral is - that kids - easy/difficult/indifferent all need boundaries and firm ones to feel secure and loved - not a parent who treats them as a 'friend' - they get plenty of those at school - a parent needs to be a parent and a friend needs to be a friend - and not those two roles confused

I agree, I work in daycare and I cant tell u how many of the mothers and fathers are ruled by the children.

They wont get into their prams when they are going home, they wont come out of the prams in the morning coming in, they basically do everything opposite to what the parents want-and the parents let them away with it.

You wouldnt believe how much children play up in front of their parents, and as soon as they leave they are perfectly well behaved-because they know they wont get away with it in nursery!

My children have discipline and we started early so that they know who is boss. We didnt want our children to walk all over us. Alot of our friends children do that and I have no idea how they handle their children. We dont beat our children, but they do get a spanking here and there and they do go to the naughty corner, or get things taken away. if they do something bad I do not let them get away with it, because sooner or later they will thin kthey can walk all over me. I'm a stay at home mom with 2 kids and one on the way and i'm not having that!!!

well alot of it is from the time they enter into school they teach the childeren that child abuse is standing in the corner, spanking, raiseing your voice, so what are parents to do the schools teach it no i had have cusins that were very abused by there father there whole life and childeren services never done a thing for those childeren they were tyed to clothes lines and beaten with a belt in day light outside and now thats abuse but if you tap your child on the rear with your hand or a paddle you are abuseing it , i think that the goverment has put parents in a bad situation when it comes to there own childeren , and punishment and the older theses childeren get the harder it is going to be on them when they get older and hit someone they are going to think its ok they can get by with it and when they are arrested for it then they are not going to think they should be punished

It is because society has parents afraid of their children. I am not saying that a parent should abuse their child but as I child, I received a swat or two on the behind when I got out of line and I came out perfectly fine.

To tell you the truth - they're afraid if they tell their child no they could end up in jail (that's what it's come down to anymore).

They also feel if they discipline their child - the child will hate them.............................. boy do they have this ALL wrong!!!!!

Children NEED direction, boundaries and discipline!!!!!

My son disciplines his three and they are all great kids and I love having them around. They are respectful of others and very rarely get into trouble.