I want to get married and he doesn't. Do we still have a chance?

The thing is, when two people in a relationship do not want the same thing, it's like one of you is in a bus that is headed for Carlifornia, when you really want to go Singapore, the bus driver is headed for carlifornia and so you cannot make him, turn the bus around for you.

There is no reason for a guy to not want to marry the woman he loves.

My mother always said if the guy is getting the milk for FREE, (i.e getting the benefits of marriage without making a lasting commitment) he will not want to buy the cow.

All the women I know who stayed with a man that did not want marriage either eventually got dumped by the guy or dumped the guy or dragged the man down to the altar kicking and screaming and evetually ended in divorce.

Honey! I know you must have put a lot into this relationship but if he does not want what you want, then there is absolutely no point.

You are not mad or crazy for wanting to secure your future.

That is why people sign a contract, to make sure that both parties involved are getting the benefit of the business or marriage.

Men tend to weigh out the pros and cons of the woman he's involved with before he ever considers marriage. All too often it's the man who's hesitant to commit unless he's absolutely sure...Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with that. However, I believe the answer to this question depends on your history, efforts, compatibility, and how much time you have invested.

If you have remained in a totally committed, monogamous relationship with this man, that's the first asset he has with you. Next, if you've been a dependable, giving, productive part of the relationship...that's asset number two. Then, if the two of you get along and have a close friendship along with your romantic ties...that's the third asset. Finally, if you have been consistent with what you have to offer this man as a wife and he's still not willing to commit, the reality is that he may never will. None of us are getting any younger and I've seen many women invest years in a man who never would make the final step for commitment.

I don't advise you to give up. Only you know your limitations and how long you're willing to wait. I wish you the best of luck.

You still have a chance. It dosen't matter if you have a ring on your finger it matters if you love each other. Maybe he is afraid of marriage because it is said that most people would have stayed together without marriage. In the women's eyes marriage is a sign that the man is ready to be with the women for the rest of their lives.

Yes couples get back together after this happens who they would break up? Give it a couple of months he'll come around.

Hope this helped!

You need to figure out why he doesn't want to get married and see if you can live with that. Why do you want a change? You can't go on in the hopes he will change, you have to go on knowing you can be happy with things the way they are now and the rest will come in to place. You don't need a paper to give you more security. If that is what you are looking for I think he is right and you need to work through your issues first. the security should be there before you get married.

My very good friend has lived together with her man for the past 25 years...they have a beautiful child together. Last year, they decided they would get married. I dont know why they decided to get married after 25 years...maybe they thought it was time....lol. Their relationship laster longer than a lot of marriages. My daughter has lived with her partner for the last 10 years....they have one daughter and another one on the way. The reason they havent married is because they cant afford it. They love each other dearly and not being married has had no ill effects on their love for each other. I am seeing a man who had a terrible marriage.....he sees marriage as ownership, and as much as I dont want to agree with him, I tend to believe it myself. He is entitled to his opinions.....he was badly damaged in his marriage and he has no respect for it, and he is pretrified of it. We love each other with all our hearts....thats the part that matters most. Marriage comes second to our love. Maybe one day he will want to marry, but at the moment the prospect scares the hell out of him.

Maybe your boyfriend is scared of marriage because the divorce rate is very high and maybe that has had a bearing on the reasons he doesnt want to get married.

My best advice to you is to sit him down and ask him why he doesnt want to get married. If he is afraid of getting married, then his fears are real. I cant make the man I love change the way he feels about marriage....that is something that will take time to change. Whatever the reason, it is real for your boyfriend.....or maybe its a simple case of not being able to afford it. Maybe he can think of better things to do with his money. Ask him, find out the reasons and once you have his reasons then you will have something to go on. Once you have this vital information you can help him "fix" it. My only hope of marriage is to show the man I love that marriage doesnt have to be about ownership...but it is going to take some time to de-program him from the damage his ex-wife caused him. For him, the fear is real. Maybe your boyfriend has the same fears.

I guess, if you love him, you just have to wait until he is ready. If you are living with him, you still have all the legal rights a wife has. Marriage is just a piece of paper and of course you would feel more secure if you got married. But marriage does not mean the relationship will work. Marriage does not make love become stronger. Look at the divorce rate to know that what I am saying is true.

Its the love you both have for each other that will determine if your relationship will stand the test of time. Marriage is not the reason a relationship survives...its the love....always the love.

Sorry to hear that you are at that stage. What I have found to be true is that whenever the female is ready for marriage and the male isn't, the female will generally stay to see if he will change his mind. If he does, it's because she has worn him down. If he doesn't, he will never be ready. Either way is a loss. Take your losses early and move on to someone who is not afraid of commitment.

Depends on the time you have been together. If it's three years, then it's time to move on. If you are living together - then that's the problem, not the time, so move out on your own, and keep dating him a while more and see what happens.

If he doesn't want to get married,he never will.He will find an excuse after another one.Some men are not for marriage....They just want to have their cake and eat!But sometimes they do change their minds,I don't know how and why.

You just have to decide if you are willing to accept his choice for both of you....because after all he is deciding for both of you.

Either you give up on asking him about marriage..or you simply give up on him.

Do you still have a chance at what? A lifetime decision has to be mutual, you were never on the same page.

If he does not want to marry you now he never will it is that simple move on, and I know it will hurt but you are better off without him don’t waste your pretty on him there are plenty of men out there that want the same things you do.