90% of Elementary School Kids Are Bullied -?

but...but...but...if all the 80's teen movies and those who come here to disparage home schooling are to be believed, bullying is a character building experience which invariably is overcome. it turns scrawny boys into heroes and plain girls into beauty queens.

surely it NEVER leads to tragedies, destroys its victims' self esteem, interferes with learning, causes further withdrawal in the introspective, or drives anyone to violent retaliation. and it certainly never goes beyond fisticuffs, never anything worse than a blackened eye or bloody nose, right?

(that was sarcasm, for those of you whose sarcasm detectors are on the fritz)

And 6 in 10 are bullies themselves. A great deal of bullying comes from children who are bullied by their parents, siblings or some other relative at home. They have to learn it somewhere. So while it's not character building and it should not be a part of childhood, it happens. It also happens with adults. What needs to happen is to get to the root cause of it all. Bullying is done because the bully feels powerless. Picking on someone who is weaker gives that person a feeling of power. Until our society as a whole addresses it and admits that it partly comes from home, we will always have the problem. There have been interviews with former bullies who have said as much. There are some examples in the book Odd Girl Out. So, it's not always a public school problem. It's a problem everyone needs to address.

I get the impression that you assume 90% of students are bullied by 10% of students. The truth is that most children are both bullies and victims. Ask a group of kids if they have been bullied and most kids will say yes. Ask that same group of kids if they have ever been a bully and most will say yes. It is easy for a parent to blame other children for their child's problems but the idea that getting rid of bullies will make schools better is silly. That would make schools empty.

Think back to your own childhood. Would you be more apt to tell your parents that you were bullied or that you were the bully? When I read a book about bullying to a class most kids understand that they are both bully and victim over the course of day or week.

Parents need to focus on coping skills and resilience. Home schooling is not the issue. Socialization happens everywhere, even at home. The sad truth is that both the constant bully and the constant victim are BOTH in need of help.

Book list:

http://www.best-childrens-books.com/childrens-book...

Not entirely. The predatory pack behavior of teenage girls is certainly great training for boardroom manipulation, isn't it?

Anyone doubting the true behavior of children at school (which is anyone saying, "well, not my little angel") needs a reality check, but anyone saying the problem is only in public schools needs a reality check, too. Sociology would say problems are possible any time three or more kids get together, regardless of the location.

I'd advise reading "Queen Bees & Wannabees" by Rosalind Wiseman, for more info on social behavior in schools. It's an unbiased look from an adult's perspective, and also explains how and why "situations" occur.

I have two children and they are both in the public school system. Neither one has ever been bullied. I guess since you say that 90% of elementary school kids are bullied, mine must be quite fortunate. I'm sorry, I don't believe in home schooling. Even if my children had been bullied, this would have prepared them for the world we live in. At some point in life, whether you are home schooled or not, you will be faced with a bully. You must be prepared to face such people and stand up to them. What do these children, who are home schooled do when they are faced with a bully when they are adults. Do they run indoors and hide from them. The answer is no, so why not prepare them when they are young and will have the support of others to help them. Come on, we have to face the world at some point. The best why to tackle our fears is to face them!

The socialization issue is ridiculous. It's like the working moms giving the stay at home moms a hard time and vice versa. Just another way to be ugly to each other and judge each other. Not nice.

As long as homeschooled kids are getting a quality education, shut up already. Anyone with half a brain should understand that and then get their noses out of other people business.

I so don't get the needing to learn how to be bullied thing! What adults get bullied? That is SO beyond me! I'm pushing 38, and I have never been bullied as an adult, nor do I know anyone who has been bullied as an adult. I realize that there are manipulative adults, but to me that's a whole other thing that takes maturity more than experience to know how to handle. I guess there's the potential drunk in a bar situation where you might be facing bodily harm or verbal abuse, but that is an optional situation to be in at any age. I just don't get it! To my knowledge, adults typically can go to work without worrying about being thrown against a locker. Kids that bully usually mature and learn how to treat other people by adulthood. Those that don't are called criminals.

I don't know about that. In reference to the socialization that homeschoolers are missing out on, I have personal statistics that may help you. Out of my child's twelve really good friends, eleven of them are ones she met in school. Being in the same class(es) tends to bring children closer together, in my opinion, as they have more to share/more in common. I'm not saying that your source is wrong, but, just like Lucas, I believe that 90% of elementary kids are bullied is too large of a number. I also think that children can make friends by getting out there in other ways, and homeschooling your child is a person decision that has pros and cons.

Sounds about right... and don't forget about the great educational experience they lose out on.... I would say at least 1 out of 4 teachers told us that "they have so many students they can't worry about one" Of course, mine being the one..... I had a problem with that. But, don't get me started on public schools and the lack of education therein...after all, our district supervisor told us at a Board meeting once that "there are no surveys that indicate children can learn better in small classes" .... so naturally I had to give him some.

As for bullying...I would say that the teacher who puts a child in the hallway for the entire day...because she "forgot" he was out there...is a bigger bully than any of the kids.

And the principal that makes a child sit in her office everyday until he gives the story SHE says is the right one...Is a bully.

Did you know you can intimidate a child that is almost twice your size by running away after you escape from the headlock he had you in? Just ask our principal....

the big problem with this article and others like it is that it doesn't define "bullying." If they expand bullying to mean anytime someone has said anything negative about the kid EVER, then, yeah there are going to be lots of bullied kids. But, if you specify bullying to mean, say, physical alterations or verbal abuse, that's a totally different issue

90% are bullied...this means at least 90% of children have gotten their feelings hurt. There is always someone wanting to be the alpha dog. I doubt that 90% of children are bullied to where it is an actual problem. They ARE children, they are fighting for their place in this world.

I do not keep my son home because of bullying issues. Some bullying can be helpful, as in the real world they are going to have to deal with similar head games at some point. Mine stays home because I can provide a better education than the system can.

But I get your point. Whenever I hear the socialization question my response is, " You are kidding, right?" This is the same child they drool over and wish their child/ren would act like. Not that he is perfect...just nearly :)