Was I wrong? Or should I have just never gotten back to her about it?

No you did the right thing in my opinion. If I were giving you one of my animals I would want someone who is up front and honest with me.

You did the right thing letting this person know you may not want a cat you'd (presumably) said you wanted.

But - and bear in mind I know nothing about you or this situation other than what you have posted, or who this other person is (breeder? someone with an oops litter of kittens?) so can only judge on what I read here - I can understand why she would feel you'd messed her around.

The following points would annoy me:

1. the impression your email gives me is that you originally expressed an interest in a brown tabby cat but now may not want the cat because you've found another cat you like better

2. You have recently got another cat but are thinking of giving it to a 3rd party within days. Any reputable breeder or person wanting to rehome an accidental litter responsibly would not be happy with that. They want to make sure there cats go to good homes and would not be happy with the cat being given to a 3rd party they hadn't met so quickly.

3. You admit yourself in the email that your house may not be big enough for a 3rd cat. This would worry any responsible breeder that you would give this cat away due to insufficient space or that the cat would not have a good home.

Like I said, I don't know you and can only comment on what you've written here, but if it was me you were going to get a kitten from and I received that email I'd be a bit fed up and think that you were messing me around. You did the right thing in being honest about your circumstances and telling her to give the cat to someone else if they were interested, but it might have been better to just tell her that you could no longer take the cat, and apologise for any inconvenience you've caused (to be polite - not necessarily as admission that you were in the wrong).

No of course you werent wrong to let her know that so she could give the cat to someone else. And I can understand that since you had said you'd take her you didn't want to say a flat out "No" - - although it sounds like that really is the best choice not to get another cat.

I think what she was reacting to mostly was probably hearing that you were thinking of giving away a cat you'd just got days before . That probably made her feel like she couldn't be sure what would happen to her brown tabby if she gave her to you. I would be concerned too if i had talked to one person about taking a pet and then it sounded like there was a good chance they might just pass my cat on to someone I knew nothing about.

Plus to be honest, the way you expressed things in your email might have added to her feeling that the situation seemed confused - - if you read it again, you can see it seems to jump back and forth at least 3 times and keeps repeating itself . (I'm not meaning to be rude, i'm sure I write like that sometimes too. :-)

Have fun with your Siamese. I LOVE Meezers myself, they are the most wonderful cats!

(btw folks, the questioner never said she couldn't afford it, she said it was a small house - -that doesn't automatically equal being not able to afford vet care etc.)

It sounds like you're adding three cats to the family in a number of days, or considering it, when you can't afford to. Why are you giving a cat you just got a couple of days ago to your brother? You probably should have just told her you couldn't take the cat and leave it at that. As it is, it sounds like you aren't a very responsible pet owner and that is probably what she is reacting to.

It was very nice of you to let her know. It was also very very nice of you to try to find a home for another kitty that could have ended up in a shelter!!! She was probably just grouchy...people seem to be that way now days.

I'm not sure of your question but you do sound VERY flaky and someone with already more pets than you have the room - or probably the financial means - to care for.

you did the right thing

i would rather you be honest with me,so yes you done right thing