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Christians only -Please! Regarding friend's husband and church?

I don't want to offend anyone, but I really do need only Christians who can help me out. My friend has recently started attending my church. She has 2 small children and takes them with her, but her husband who is not a Christian, does not want anything to do with the church. He has attempted to even prohibit my friend from attending the church. It is a non-denominational Bible-based church. It is becoming a huge issue in their marriage and I don't know what advice to give her. Should she, as a Christian wife honor her husband's request and stop going to church, or should she continue to go, knowing that it is going against her husband's wishes? Please- serious answers only. If you have any scripture to support your answer, please include as well. Thank you!

Update:

Oh, I forgot to mention- I don't get into it because I know that marital issues are between the 2 of them. However, she is asking for sound, Christian advice. She is torn between being submissive to her husband and obeying God. He is a non-Christian and she became a Christian after they were already married for several years.

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    A true Christian is to aways put God first in their own lives. On judgment day she will not be able to answer for her husband but will be responsible for her own actions. I would suggest to seek Gods help with her husband and to ask others friends, church members that God will deal with his heart. Then she should continue to live the Christian life in front of him by letting her light shine. He will come around. Tell her to remind him of his vowels he made at the wedding and continue to pray he will see the light. I will pray for their family also.

    G

  • 1 decade ago

    I believe she should continue going to church. Ultimately, we have to answer to God; he's all that matters in the end. I'm really sad that your friend has to choose between going against her husband's word and going to church. I will pray for her. I'm glad that you are supporting your friend and looking for some guidance but with this serious of a question, I think spending some quiet time praying, reading the bible,and listening for an answer is going to be the only way you will know what God wants. I also recommend the book, "The Purpose Driven Life" to your friend if she is a new christian. Or even an old christian I suppose, it will help her figure out where her life purpose from a religious perspective.

  • 1 decade ago

    That's a tough one because a wife is supposed to respect her husband but on the other hand you have this passage that seems like in the case of attending church she should put God above her husband's desires in this matter.

    Hebrews 10:24 And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, 25 not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.

    I think that she should explain to her husband that she respects him and doesn't want to cause trouble in the marriage but God says that Christians are supposed to get together on a regular basis.

  • 5 years ago

    OK, thanks for clarifying. Quote: if Jesus is our Lord, then what difference does it make what the sign over the door of our church says? In many regards there are times when indeed you are right. Many different churches teach generally very similar dogma. However, listen to what Paul says here: Galatians 5:2-4, DRC, Behold, I Paul tell you, that if you be circumcised, Christ shall profit you nothing. 3 And I testify again to every man circumcising himself, that he is a debtor to the whole law. 4 You are made void of Christ, you who are justified in the law: you are fallen from grace. ---------- This is an example of dogma that makes void Christ. Such dogma is not unique. Several other dogma similarly is so erroneous that agreement must not be made with those believing in it. Another example is about the resurrection. Here Paul says this: 2 Tim 2:18, ACV, ". . . men who missed the mark about the truth, saying the resurrection happened already, and they overthrow the faith of some. " ----------- As demonstrated, Paul shows that our faith which consists of beliefs, dogma, must on the basic issues be correct. Such basic issues are elsewhere numerated. One may perhaps say that a brief list would be: Who is God? Christ? What is the purpose of the ransom? What is grace? how does it function? What is death? hell? When is the resurrection? What and when is Judgment? who receives positive and Who receives negative judgment? What is this reward? Do we obey the Law Covenant? circumcision? Sabbath? etc What is free will? and is God omniscient about the future? --------- There is little consensus on many of these issues, and cannot be. Those who do not make up their minds based on scripture but base their logic on church teachings will never get the above right.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Being a Christian does not mean you must attend church. In fact, Jesus spoke against it. Being a Christian means following the teachings of Jesus Christ and trying to live accordingly. The sermon on the mount: "Go ye not into the synagogues for men do these things to be seen by others.

    But, when you pray, go ye into your closet and say Our Father...." Jesus knew the hypocrisy of the church and warned us. Faith is a personal thing. I think she should honor her husbands' wishes to show her dedication to their marriage and pray in private to the Lord. God grants us our wishes and listens to our prayers. If she enjoys the social participation of the church, then God will find a way to touch her husbands heart and mind. Leave it to

    God.

  • 1 decade ago

    You're going to get very passionate answers for both sides of this question, but ultimately, only that husband and wife can figure this one out. And, if people outside the marriage start pushing the issue, it could make the situation worse for both of them, or hasten the end of the marriage if thats where it's heading. Have faith. It'll come out the way it's meant to. The best thing you as a friend can do for her is support her either way.

  • 1 decade ago

    If you really want her to be a Proverbs wife, she should listen to her husband and not create any drama between them. It is wrong of him to limit her in such a way i agree, however this is the kind of issue that breaks up marriages. I think that she is better suited to try and have a peaceful marriage.

    I am sure you do not know the whole story,

    Has she become really self-rightious and preachy towards him?? How does he feel about HIS children getting this religion?? What problems were they having Before?? Does he feel neglected?? Why is he against the church in the first place...

    there is much to really know.

  • 1 decade ago

    If you read 1 Corinthians 7, it talks about a believing and unbelieving spouses starting around verse 12. In verse 17, it states "each of you should remain in the place in life that the Lord has given you." Only your friend can know her place, and she should pray and read 1 Corinthians 7 for some guidance.

    My personal opinion, therefore, is that she should go to church if she believes that in doing so, she is more likely to save her husband, and prevent her children from rejecting God.

  • 1 decade ago

    You are wise to stay out of it, unless she asks you for advice don't give her any.

    But, the bible makes it clear that no one should be put before God.

    I've known first hand a woman who had a controlling husband and when she found god and started going to church, he demanded she quit going.

    Out of fear of him leaving her, she obeyed him. Seven years later, he left her for the women he'd been having an affair with for ten years!

    She hasn't come back to church yet and that was about eight years ago. Instead, she's a basic bar fly, with no desire for anything other than the next drink.

    Very, very sad.

    I hope your friend is wiser than mine was.

  • 1 decade ago

    The husband should not be able to prohibit his wife's devotion to God in any way. It is similar to the Apostles situation when they were told by the religious leaders not to preach anymore, they responded that they would be obedient to God and not man. Her husband may be the head of the household, but God is the true head of her life and she has every right to appeal to the higher law. If I were her, I would excersize great humility and patience toward her husband while showing Him the love of Christ no matter what she will get in return for it. This situation might get worse before it gets better, but trust God through it all. Jesus is in the boat!

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