Thank the parents OR blame the parents?

My dad passed away when I was 10. My mom would go out after work every night and leave me to care for my dad when he was sick. By the time I was 8 I knew how to give him his shots, his meds, check his blood sugar, change the bandages from his amputation, and empty the bed pan. This was my responsibility.

After daddy died things didn't change much. I was left to take care of the house, and when I started working I had to pay half of the bills. I started using drugs and my mom didn't care. She once saw track marks on my arms and told me to put on something with long sleeves because it was embarrassing. When I was diagnosed bipolar she put me in the hospital for over a year and never came to visit, she didn't even pick me up when I was given a pass for the holidays.On the day of my 18th birthday I left, I speak to my mom about once a year.

Now I'm 27yo, I have three kids, and a good life. To answer your question... I THANK my mother. She was neglectful and not a very good parent, but it was her flaws that gave me the strength to deal with my son's Autism (the right way), it was her flaws that made me grow up early and become the responsible adult I am today. I don't speak to her much, but she's still my mom and I love her. I have a good life now, but even in bad times I don't BLAME my mom, she's just who she is.

Sorry I kind of went on and on, but the question hit home.

With all the mistakes my parents made in raising me, and they will admit to their many mistakes, I thank them for how they did. They were far from perfect but they supported me and encouraged me. They didn't give me everything I could ever want. But there are many things about the way my parents raised me that to this day, I am not like. I was raised to be judgmental and discriminatory in many ways. I chose not to be. In fact, I've been able to teach my parents to think differently than they were raised. I don't think you can blame them for how you relate to other people. You are cold, distant and unaffectionate because you choose to continue your parents' legacy. You could ignore those lessons you were taught if you want to. It's entirely your choice.

I thank my mother and step-father. I am fairly ambivalent toward my biological father.

The only people who have done everything they could to make sure I had all the things I needed to build a successful life of my own were my mother and stepdad.

My father only thinks of himself and did nothing to contribute to my success.

Since my mother and stepdad did do such an awesome job, however, I have no one to blame but myself if my life isn't everything I want it to be. I do realize that not everyone is as lucky as I was, though, and some people do have perfectly legitimate reasons for blaming their parents.

Peace,

Jenn

Definitely thank. I've been at dark places in my life, but during the bad times and the good, my mum has been there throughout. I'm at a brilliant stage in my life now, and it's all because of her love and never ending belief in me.. I never grew up with a father as he was a "come and go" parent up until i was a teenager, then at that point he finally left our home, and my life for good once my mum divorced him. But it's because of him going i got to see and appreciate how strong, self sufficient and brilliant my mum really is.. And how she worked 4 jobs so i wouldn't miss out on anything my friends had, and to provide a safe and comfortable roof over my head.. I never saw that when my father was around because his presence always overshadowed hers. My mum has a quiet, assured strength. My father was the loud one, but ironically it covered a weak and cowardly nature. I haven't seen him in years, and we could probably pass each other by on the street and not recognise each other which is rather sad - But i can't say i miss him in all honesty. He's missed out on more because he wasn't at my wedding, and he's never seen his twin grandsons. He'll probably never see these next ones either.. He wasn't often physically abusive, but he was emotionally abusive, and he put my mum through hell. I was just sheltered from the worst of it because my mum suffered in silence, and shifted me off to grandparents to prevent me from being around it.

Blame the parents up to the age of 25 but after it's yoor owm fault as a saying goes but. I'll always blame my mother for my lack of self-confidence.

I thank them for having the brains to move out of Russia when I was seven. But part of me does wish we haden't gone to the western world because there is many things wrong with it, teens getting pregnant, abortions and so many people not being strict enough with their children.

I don't think I'd be living the way I do now if it wasn't for my parents, I may be a little strict as a parent but they were much more stricter than I am and I thank them for it. I have morals, goals and I didn't go off the rails like most kids in the western world do.

I will never ever thank my parents, my father was abusive, my mother could've cared less about me, she forgot what day my b-day was on until my kindergarten teacher had to tell her when it really was, even after that they never remembered it anyways. The only person i will ever thank is my friend's mom, I practically lived at their house during high school, she listened to me, gave me advice and the most important thing, she loved me. I am 23 yrs old and if it wasnt for her I would probably be a drug addict **** just like my sisters. I have a wonderful husband and a beautiful daughter thanks to her, when people ask me if she is my mom I say yes, she was more of a mother to me than my own.

I believe that my parents both positively and negatively influenced me. Mostly positive though now looking back. They lacked a lot of information (part of that being my own fault) that could have helped them to better help me through some trying times.

I'm a good place in life but I am looking to do better. I can honestly say for the most part I thank my parents.

I also give credit where is it due: to God. God placed me in the family that He did for His reasons and His purposes. So over all, I thank God for my parents. One of the things my parents did right was to introduce me to Jesus Christ.

Myself and my 18 siblings all thank our parents for sure! I myself is doing fantastic in life. My parents were very very strict, due to so many kids at home. But it was a very loving home, clean home, safe home and we had what we needed in life!

We all got great paying jobs, what I mean in great paying none of us ever made under $65k a year. My father was a very hard working man to support us all, and he and my mother taught us what a good paying job can do for you. Naturally love is much more important but money gets you by and feeds and clothes your family. So all of us kids fought to get great paying jobs and we wouldn't settle for less. We worked very hard also, and we all made it! I have 4 older siblings who retired at 47 years old, and I did 2 years ago at 47 also.

I'm very happily married to my wife for 31 years now. We raised 3 daughters and 5 sons. We put all of them through college and they all got married too. Due to and accidental dead of my brother's wife and my brother becoming paralyzed from the neck down. We took custody of his 9 children also, and put them through college and they all married too. They were in the same age group as our children.

Because of my father, I did my best to be the best father ever for my kids and I taught them the same morals, and standards that my dad taught me. And once again it paid off! My 8 kids have all said to me and my wife Thank You for being such great parents!

Thank you mom and dad! And Happy 60th Wedding Anniversary!

After going back and reading some of the stories above, I realize even more so just how lucky I was growing up in a calm, caring, loving home. It's sad for some children of what they have to endure as a child, they grow up so far and basically lose out on their child hood. It's just not right!

i thank them for the fact i turned out to have my baby daughter, but some of the things i grew up seeing and having to deal with i dont thank them for. i dont particularly blame them for anything but i blame them for me not having any confidence, and being depressed and suicidal far in the past, because of the way i was brought up, but ive let all that go now. i am just greatful for my daughter, the past is the past in my eyes.