When do yahoo!answers contacts go too far?

For me, it is when they asks questions and I anser them and they gie me the 10 points, even though i haven't merited it, as they want to help me

The problem is that if Y!A sees too many BAs from this one member, they think point gaming and i get deleted

I don't really draw the line when I'm online. I mean what's the difference between an online person and someone I see at the supermarket? I have no problem telling people I'm a 27 year old male model living in California and sometimes across Europe in my vacation villas.

Your experiences sound creepy, though. Y!A stalking. That's got to be a few steps below Facespace stalking for sure. I draw the line at whatever you don't feel comfortable with.

That and address and phone # and SIN #, and credit card #. I don't have a problem with pictures. Everyone has an online picture. Whenever you go outside you show people what you look like. But if you know this person is going to be *staring* at your picture in a super-creepy way and that makes you uncomfortable, don't do it.

Or if you suspect they need the picture to find where you live O.o

Being online shouldn't be an odd creepfest. If you're not feeling comfortable with what your contacts are doing, it's gone too far.

It's odd when people contact *you* to pry more information about yourself. It might be symptomatic of some weird obsession.

@arabesque

I was wondering the same kind of thing; why isn't anyone stalking me?

I could set you up with a stalker if you really want. His name is Gregory, but he goes by Jane_Pony_Princess2001 online. Message me if you're interested.

Oh I have a lot of my Y!A contacts as friends on Facebook--those who know my real name (hehehehe). Weirdest thing was that I found out that one of my contacts actually goes to the same school as me (weird right?!?). I don't think FB adding is creepy at all. It's not any different than if I met some stranger while grocery shopping or at the movies. They've seen my face and they could probably follow me home if they wanted to.

I trade emails, I do Facebook, and plenty of other things with my contacts. They're my contacts for a reason -- I like them. They're fun. And I don't think they're going to creep on me any time soon.

I can't say that there's a definite line where it's going too far with my contacts. If I feel uncomfortable, chances are that I'm not going to get more comfortable with time. If I knew full well that it was some old guy or gal that wanted my picture...well that would freak me out. And I wouldn't do it. It's all about what you're comfortable with. I'm not a very paranoid person. I'm happily naive. Of course, I'm not going to add any Joe-Schmo and then tell them all my personal information. There are things that are nobody else's business.

If you're creeped out by this guy and giving your picture, don't do it. You don't want to regret your decision later down the road. Don't get yourself into trouble. You can be nice about it and everything, but you don't want to make yourself uncomfortable just so somebody else gets their way.

This is too far. This is where you draw the line.

You should never say yes to something like this if you're not comfortable with it.

Seriously, I have a friend who met a "14 year old girl" over the internet, they started chatting on MSN, became "good friends". Next thing you know, this "girl" is actually a 43 year old man. Not good. My friend got out of it just in time, luckily.

First names are OK, countries are OK, ages are... OK

Thats about it. Oh, blood types and fingernail lengths are in there too I guess, lol.

Really, block him, send him an email saying you're not comfortable with what hes asking, break contact with him. End of story. If he's gone too far, thats his problem, not yours.

Contacts are cool, fun. But if it gets weird or uncomfortable it's not fun anymore. If its creeping you out, stop. Theres no point in worrying about something like this, just stop it.

I'd never give a photo to someone I didn't know. Why do they even need it? Exactly, they don't.

In fact, youre the only person online who's ever asked me where I lived.... :P

About you're dropping off the face of earth, my understanding here, is that you haven't had time to answer a few questions here, but you have had time for a creepy 70 year old bloke...?

lol

First, blocking is not your solution. He'll just set up another ghost account and stalk you again and again.

Send him your picture? wth? No way. 70 yr old man my foot. Be careful, there's lots of people out there. Dont send your picture. Darw the line at a polite email saying that you are on NO account going to correspond with him. And the usual sentimental stuff that I type when I email my mom about the B- I got in Biology.

About Billet and you being the same person, I wouldn't be surprised you know. But somehow, Eliza doesn't fit you.

A slight contact with contacts is no prob, beacuse most times, they dont know your email id. But sending you picture, thats too much.

Besides, I could never imagine you getting married to a 70 year old semi retired truck driver, and being called aunty em.

@ Billet: I actually liked the cookies, but the costume was a tad too sparkly.

I think you should stop replying to him, and yes, I think he has gone to far.

Personally, I never let it get to that. I always hear stuff on the news about the teens meeting up with other teens that they met via myspace...and then they end up getting into deep dodoo. So, I make it a rule that any friendships I make online are only done if I can be sure that they are who they say they are. And, if I know that they are older than me by a certain amount of years, I do not allow any online friendships. Like, some 33 year old male on facebook wanted to be my friend and chat...he might be nice, but I have no reason to be talking to a divorced 33 year old, ya know? So I try to keep a line in some cases.

Another example, is my boyfriend. He played Yoville on Facebook for a while and met a lonely 42 year old lady. She was friendly at first, and he is a sucker for sad people. So, he eventually gave her his phone number so that she could vent to him. But, it led to a really weird rode of obsession in her case. It ended pretty badly, so now he is against befriending older people online in general.

But yea, in any case, just stop replying. I know whatcha mean, who would spend hundreds of dollars to go stalk one person? And he might just be some weirdo trying to freak you out. So, I doubt he will literally try hunting you down. But hey, you never know. Stranger things have happened!

On another note, I see your point. I used to play neopets religiously, and I have had some friends from there still on my facebook/myspace, even after four years. One is having her second baby soon, and I'm sending her clothes and what not, and another one is saving her flier miles for whenever the boyfriend and I tie the knot xD.

In your situation I would probably delete his emails, but reply to one with a simple message that he has no business asking for your photos, and that you will no longer be corresponding with him. For there on, I would just ignore him. Whatever you decide to do, don't feel bad, not at all! He really has no business asking for pictures of you and what not.

On a random note, no one sends me creepy letters! I feel so unloved. Even my boyfriend gets those creepy emails about obsession from overweight men. Then again, my blood is O-, so maybe that's why...no one cares about the O- people...

On ANOTHER random note..and i had to add it in here because of the "hot people in America.." thing. Back in High School we had a guy come from Germany, and when we asked what was the biggest difference between Germany and America, he answered in an annoyed sort of way, "The girls here, they are so fat! I have never seen so many fat girls, and why are some wearing skirts!"

On another random note..I never believe the "Im an only lonely man" bit. My Grandpa is younger than 70, and can hardly figure out how to use his email, let alone find his way onto Y!A. Then again, there are those old guys who are computer savvy. Hmm, thinking about it, I just cant see a 70 year old doing this. Maybe going into a chat room or something. -ponders-

And, a question for you! Since we are talking about online contacts, what do you think about online relationships?

It really depends on what *you* consider going too far.

I mean, to you having contacts on facebook isn't weird, but it makes me a little uncomfortable, as much as I sincerely love them. I'd rather meet a person face-to-face and *then* decide to add them on facebook.

How about this: If you feel uncertain or weird about something, the contact has taken it too far. They may not be aware of it, so you should make sure you let them know. Define your boundaries.

Obviously, don't send him a picture of you. The worst people are always the ones who seem too nice *and* insistent. Tell him you don't feel comfortable doing so. If he understands, he understands, and if he doesn't, he doesn't. Actually, if he doesn't, I'd recommend blocking him because arguing with you about it and insisting more would blow the weird factor out of the water and I wouldn't want to talk to the person anymore.

So, Alex. Use your best judgment. Go with your gut feeling. Usually, it's right. You asking this question says a lot. Now act on it!

Oh and hi to you too. I forgive you for dropping off the face of the earth, though I did miss you. You missed Billet's question about weird dreams! Oh, and maybe if you did a part time job, it might cut the hours down to 29 and you could breathe for another hour :p

@LuthienT: HAHA well, Billet was apparently in a flying castle, and so I was like "oh, no she didn't" because *moving* castles are better. (From Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynn Jones.) So I said that I'm in a moving castle. And then Billet said that her castle beats mine and then I said "but Billet has no Howl" (the most dashing, vain, flamboyant, fantastic wizard in the world and I want to marry him), and in response, Billet is apparently crucio-ing me. And that's the story. All through our Y!A names!

You should draw the line at sending the picture. Even though he might seem like a nice lonely man, you have no way of knowing for sure. You should politely inform him that you are not comfortable giving out your picture online to people you don't really know case closed. He should accept that and if he keeps asking or pestering you that's when you have a problem. I think the emails are fine as long as you're not sharing too much personal information through them e.g. address, name, school or that kind of thing.

I mean he could be your average, friendly 70- year old but with online friends there's always the question. With contacts, even though I know that they are wonderful people, I would never add them on Facebook. I may seem like a horrible person but it's just to protect myself from people who could potentially not be what they seem. I have to admit that even though we're great online friends I've never actually *met* them so I'm a little wary at having contacts access my Facebook and private information. Though, I still keep in touch with some of my contacts over Y!A email. This may or may not be different for you, those are just my standards.

I think you should block that guy. Maybe he is just a nice old guy who's lonely, but you really can't be too careful. He should know better than to ask an eighteen-year-old girl to give him a picture of her. That's enough to make anyone want to block a person online.

I, personally, think the line needs to be drawn when contacts start asking for personal information like a picture. I'd never add anyone online as a friend on Facebook, but that's just me. It depends on what sort information you keep on your Facebook.

And I know what you mean by needing thirty hours in a day:( I think this is the first time I've been on Y!A in about a month.

Yeah, that's a bit weird. You should probably keep an eye on that guy. If he really is an innocent man, then I'm sure he'd be fine with you telling him that you don't feel comfortable giving out all that information about yourself on the Internet.

I'd say that I probably trust that most my contacts really are who they say they are, however, I'm not about to go off telling them exactly where I live and whatnot. I once heard a statistic that about one-fifth of the people you meet in a chat-room are sex offenders.

With me, I'm fine with people knowing that I live in New York, but I'd never tell anyone the exact city, no matter how much I trust them. I don't care if people know how old I am, but if anyone ever asks for other personal information about me, then I'd probably block them right away. And I'd never give anyone my full name.

So yeah, I try to be pretty careful on the Internet. The last thing I need right now is to get kidnapped or something. That'd suck for me.

And we've missed you! I'm all for you having a job and being a student, but c'mon! You can have a great social life right here on Y!A. Forget those crazy "real life" people.

Edit: Alex, I think you might need block Billet-Doux too. She knows your blood-type? I don't even know my own blood-type, how is it possible for someone to know someone else's blood-type? That's just crazy. Keep an eye on her.

@Billet- Hm, I think I can see how someone could mistake you for a vampire. Hasn't Origin already pointed out that you only ever come on Y!A at night?

Mmm ... this is a really interesting question ALEX. The short answer is never say anything to anyone online that you wouldn't be prepared to say to them in real life.

Now for the long answer.

Sites like Yahoo! Answers are great for social networking. As well as asking and answering questions, we have the added benefit of being able to communicate with a broad range of people from diverse backgrounds and to add them as contacts. That kind of networking is great, until you encounter someone who isn't all that they claim to be online.

The fact is, a true gentleman is never going to ask an 18 year old to send him a picture of herself or where she lives. He would not say that he loves you. The fact that he is so persistent in sending you emails is another cause for concern. You were right not to reply and you were right to block him.

Just as a warning to others, people who tend to stalk others on the internet or who want, ahem, pictures tend to be very manipulative individuals. They'll pose as someone much younger and try and win the person over with friendship and establish trust first. (This is exactly what happened to a friend of mine.)