Is it possible that I am a lesbian, even though I have been married to a man for 10 years?

Okay hun, there's a few things you need to know about the life of a homosexual. :)

First of all, you don't need to be striaght up lesbian or straight up... straight. Personally, I am bisexual (which means that I am physically, mentally and emotionally attracted to both genders). The fact that you didn't get to experiment while you were in high school is one thing that does put a bit of a downer on this situation, however you shouldn't let that stop you. The question you need to ask yourself about your marriage, in my opinion, isn't whether or not he will have sex with you or whether that is straining your marriage... but whether or not you are in love with him. If the answer is no, then (as hard as it might sound) your best bet is to go out and find the person that's right for you and stop living a lie with a person you don't love who (obviously) doesn't want anything to do with the physical part of love and you don't seem happy with. I personally am probably a bit young to be giving you relationship advice, but from my perspective, no matter if you're lesbian or not, you need to find the person who is right. So after you ask yourself these questions and if it doesn't work out, then experiment with either someone you trust, or someone you don't know and will never have to see again if you don't want to. And NEVER base your feelings for gender on one experiance. If you find the woman of your dreams don't just run away with them, if you can help it, but rather find them, hold on to them, and make a life with them. You have kids, you need to be there for them too.

However, if it turns out that you aren't as into the idea of women as you may have figured, I still think you should evaluate your relationship with your husband. Because regardless of whether you're a lesbian or not, you should be in love with the person that you're going to be with for the rest of your life.

I hope this is helpful to you. :) And good luck in finding the right answers and figuring out who the right person is for you.

Sincerely yours,

Jessica

I think the only way to really know is to just give it a try. I know it doesn't really compare, but I was in a serious relationship with a man for over two years before I started thinking I might be attracted to women. It's kind of lucky for us, that often times men tend to just think it's hot if we want to experiment with women. I did so in all openness, and became completely certain that I wanted women instead. Since then, I've been with a woman for almost four years. Obviously, not every man is the same, and you may not be able to experience what you need to so easily, but I think the only way you'll ever know for sure is if you try it out. I wish you luck, and don't just stay because it's easy.

You will know by the way girls make you feel. I am 25 years old and I realized I was a lesbian when I was 15 years old. I tried to hide it for 3 years because I was embarrassed. It was my best friend who told me she was a lesbian that made me come out. I did end up dating a man for 4 years but then I was at a party and something happened with a girl that made me realize I can't hide who I am. The way you wrote this is saying you ARE a lesbian and you have to let it out. You want to be together with the one you love and it seems that you aren't in love with your husband and your not straight. So embrace it and I would divorce your husband and get a girlfriend because it seems that girls are truly what make you happy :)

Deut 22:13-21 means that if the girl already had premarital sex,she's considered a prostitute, and has to be stoned. God is against adultery, so He sanctifies monogamy. When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 002: And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife. 003: And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife; 004: Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the LORD:... (Deut 24:1-4) Who wants to have sex while the wife has her period? It's a Hebrew practice for a brother's husband to give his first son the name of his brother's name, his brother being who died without a son. Such was the situation of Er, Onan, and Shelah. also applicable to Mahlon and Boaz. Lev 18:22 is also applicable to women.

Well hunny its every thing thats going on thats causing you to be confused so yeah you can be a lesbian after a 10 year marriage because you chose to do that,and you probably thought being with the same sex wouldn't be possible but if your unhappy then the best thing to do is separate and find someone you'll be satisfied with emotionally and sexually

GOOD LUCK HUNNY XOXOX!!!!!

There are men that go longer in a marriage to find out they are homosexual. Same could be the case for you. however, I should point out that as teenagers, people do experiment and your infatuation with women could have been just a phase. If you look at women now and want to do more than be friends with them, that could be different now that you're an adult.

you might not be a full on lesbian, you could be bi-sexual. It's possible.

i am a lesbian... i have been with my gf for a long time. about 4 years ago i met a girl through work. as soon as i met her i thought she was gay. even the first convo i heard her talking about was female to female oral sex. anyways... right from the beginning she started taking her lunch breaks at the same time as me. she'd sit right next to me. she got one of the other workers (her friend) to ask if i had a 'partner'... i said yes... i have a gf. she knew what she wanted. she was very to the point. she asked if she could give me a lift home. (i didn't have a car at that stage)... i was like no it's okay... i'll get the train. she's like don't be silly... i'll drop u home... i wanna meet ur gf anyways.

so yeah she dropped me home. she was married to a guy for about ten years... she had two kids. i met them lots of times. they were nice. on the second time she came over she pounced. she started massaging me... long story short... my gf and i had sex with her on numerous occasions over a year.

she ended up leaving her husband and kids. she got a unit. my gf and i had stop having sex with her. she got a gf... my gf and i moved. changed numbers. i have no idea if she's still with her gf or not.

so basically it's very possible to be attracted to females at any stage of ur life.

just so everyone knows.. i do regret having sex with a 'taken' person. one of my biggest mistakes.

My mom was married to my dad for many years, then turned lesbian in her 30's. She's been with her girlfriend now for about 25 years.

It is possible. After being married for 9 years my wife and I separated and both of us came out. It was not so much a surprise for me as it was for her. It has been about 8 years now and it seems she has stuck with it.

hmm well im a teenager so i cant give you an amazing answer, however it could be your marriage problems, or stress that could make you feel like wemon are better for you and would understand you more, or maybe you are bisexual (: sorry, hope i helped.