Should I send a gift to a wedding that I received Facebook invitation to?

I would send them a note of congratulations via Facebook.

A gift is never mandatory even if you do attend a wedding. However, most everyone DOES bring a gift or give a card with money at a wedding. Obviously, if you were not invited to the wedding, there is no need for a gift. Whether you DO want to send one is totally up to you. Remember that this is your niece, and even though there is so much family drama, it isn't right to take it out on her. If you are wanting to be a nice aunt, then send her a gift. But do it with generosity and kindness, not like "well, even if you didn't invite me...I am still sending you a gift." Just give it (or don't) with no strings attached.

Actually, you are incorrect in thinking that you are obligated to send a gift if you receive an invitation but do not attend. Traditionally, the rules of etiquette require the invitees to give a gift only when they actually show up to the event. I've known quite a few bridezillas who chose to conveniently ignore this fact and, unfortunately, their guests had to shell out for a present that shouldn't have even been expected.

Apart from that, the Facebook invitation seems a bit lazy. I get that the Internet facilitates quick and easy communication, but it's my opinion that a formal event should have a formal invitation.

So to answer your questions: Yes, I suppose a Facebook invitation technically "counts", tacky though it may be. No, it is not offensive to not send a gift (it is, in fact, entirely appropriate). And no, don't let them milk your wallet for even a "small gift".

In this situation, since you don't know the couple and can't attend the wedding I would say that you don't need to send a gift, but it would be nice to send a nice card (with or without a small gift card) wishing the couple well.

FaceBook invitations are still invitations, however rude they are to an event like a wedding. Remember that people in the midst of planning a wedding are often rude, but it can sometimes be excused by knowing what kind of pressure they are under right now with wedding plans and knowing that when they return to their polite selves after the wedding, rudeness in exchange for theirs will result in a grudge while graciousness in the face of their rudeness will likely have much better results.

-Scarlet

I think it would be fine not to send a gift. The reasons you stated were appropriate: a) Facebook invitation (very informal), b) sibling of your wife's friend (seems so far removed in terms of relationship) and c) you never see them. Your gift probably won't be expected or missed. Just write a "congratulations" in a comment box when they post pictures of the wedding, since your mode of communication is fb. Otherwise, I don't think you should feel obligated to send a gift. If you want to out of the kindness of your heart, then by all means, go for it. Just go to their gift registry and pick out a gift that's relatively inexpensive. But honestly, I personally wouldn't. I would just click on the "like" button after they write "We're married, hoooray!" in their status. It's a "virtual" response to a "virtual" invite.

I think in this day and age, that invitations are changing. Although, they could have done something nicer than a Facebook invite to the wedding...still, the rules are going to start changing. I've seen fancy evite wedding invitations. And, the video wedding invitations I've seen online are pretty neat, actually.

Overall, as far as the gift - if you are not attending, you don't need to send one, particularly if you don't really know them. If you feel better sending a small gift, feel free, but I don't think you have to.

Do not send them a gift. A FB invitation is NOT a real wedding invitation. And besides, you never see these people. Just send a card.

It sounds like they are hoping for your presents, not your presence. Besides the fact that a Facebook invitation is the tackiest thing ever, its pretty obvious what they're really after.

You are under no obligation to send a gift, and don't feel guilty about not sending one! Since they are such distant acquaintances, you can just offer a simple verbal congratulations the next time you see them and start planning how to dodge their tacky Facebook baby shower invites next year.

I think that a facebook invite does actually count in today's day and age of modern technology. The kind of gift you send rally depends on how well you know that individual. http://www.theengagementclub.com/ has some great gift ideas for weddings

Now I've heard it all! A Facebook Wedding Invitation??? Really???

Well, then absolutely you should be sending them a gift - how about some crops, or livestock, or even a puppy for their FARMVILLE? That's exactly what I'd be sending them!

Hey, good luck and keep it real!

Traditionally you are correct but society today is far from tradition. The era of dropping a card/invitation in the mailbox via postal service and not electronic mail, is almost obsolete. Personally, if you don't know the person first-hand or have contact with them, then a congratulations with regrets note via facebook would be appropriate. I hope this helped.