Very Serious answers please re: daughter 27?

Question

Serious Opinions please...re: daughter 27 yrs old?
My daughter has been w/her BF and engaged 2gether 4 11 yrs. 1 child going on 10, 1, 1yrs old.

My daughter (molly) left her BF home & rented an apt. no power, she can't take her kids w/o power. Father/daycare is doing it. Dad, IM'd me last nite & said, I will do anything, I told her that., I need her want her, I miss her, I told her when she came back 1st time tell me molly if I screw up, show me, he said, she left, went to the park that day, she was quite and I didn't think much she left that night and never came back, she is in contact w/her kids everyday, but last night killed me when he said KK was saying mama mama ca ca mama he said she misses her and I said, molly please come by and put KK to bed w/me and that is it then U can do what U want, she said I can't, she told me that her baby that is 1 has never been away from her and she is dieing inside missing her, but, she said I have to do what I have to do. Please just accept it mom, don't judge me, I have to do this. (I would understand, if she was ALONE trying and thinking, but he is staying w/her and the Dad stopped by her apt/last nite and he said molly come to the door and talk w/me, her 1/2 brother started running her mouth & the dad said U know I did right back. Like the dad said, he (the 1/2 bro. has nothing to loose, the dad said we lose not him. I just found out that the 10 yr old knows and this is going to destroy her (she is very dramatic), molly just told me she will be getting the kids when the power comes on perhaps wed. 
Now, she left about 1 wk ago & stayed in apt. 4 6 hrs, went back to her BF at 2:30 am that morn. Now her 1/2 brother is staying w/her to make her feel safe, she don't & won't be alone. I keep trying to tell her to go C the baby tonite she said I saw her this morn. I think she is jumping the gun on this. 
for over 6 months, things have been bad, not physical, just words and him being a jerk, now he knows he shouldn't of, but he kept telling her pack your fJ&&** bags get 2 F#$ out. she would call me crying & crying and I did tell her, Molly, U have to make this decision, she said Mom, I wish U would just tell me what 2 do, I said I can't. Went to C the same Landlord got credit and a 1 bedrm @ this time. 
About her 1/2 brother, he is almost 40, has nothing, he is an alcoholic and is staying w/her until she gets power, but, I think Molly should B by herself to go over what just happened, I mean how can she throw away 11 years and 2 kids? They have been physical w/ea. other in the past yrs ago, not now.
I feel her 1/2 brother should leave and let her B, she says, MOM, stop it, I am 27. (she has never ever been on her own, went from ME to HIM. Now that she has left him, she still isn't alone, she is w/her 1/2 bro. 
Molly always put her family 1st, she is a cna, works @ the same job over 7 yrs, never been in a bar, she didn't drink or smoke, good girl, I told her so many times I am so proud of U. 
Now, she is drinking w/her 1/2 bro, smoking too. 

I no she is 27, she will not go 2 a counselor, she said mom just support me, but I feel she should put more thought into this, so it is hard to do. And the kids, OMG< 
Should I say something to her 1/2 bro?? She will have a fit! and then some
Should I just stay out of it and see where the chips fall?
should I just be here if she needs me?

And really what do U think of a 1/2 bro, that she has only been close to for less than a yr, and never hung out w/or saw in years?

Please serious replys I wouldn't request that, but 2 children are involved, please advise me, perhaps, U know of something I could say to my daughter to open her eyes?

Please help
thank you

Sara b · Accepted Answer

You're her mother & type like a 10 year old? I couldnt understand any thing you typed. IF your daughter is afraid of her boyfriend or ex & thus afraid to be alone even drinking its understandible I've been there though I agree its bad especially with kids involved. But exactly what you're trying to ask or understand I can figure out. Being afraid of her ex can be very dramatic for anyone under any circumstances. I know I have a restraining order against my ex.

calzadillo · Answer

On this rating, I uncover myself in contract with the Guy,. The handiest approach you're going to uncover out is to take the scan. At 27 nevertheless, I might no longer say you're too historic, there was once a woman within the subsequent mattress to my spouse who was once 33 and having her first little one while our first daughter was once born ( and that was once 21 years in the past) so there's undoubtedly nonetheless wish for you, on account that I'm definite medication may have complicated plenty in the ones intervening years. As The Guy says, there's consistently the likelihood of adopting an orphan, for that reason giving 2 humans a threat of an extended lifestyles in combination, or take a look at fostering first, to look if parenthood and yourself do move hand in hand. Social Services consistently want well foster mothers and fathers for youngsters of every age, and it might deliver you a threat to check out parenthood earlier than you fully devote. Sometimes it could handiest be for brief durations, to permit mothers and fathers a few respite, others for longer durations. I am definite you're going to make a high-quality guardian, both traditional or foster, please believe approximately the choices to be had when you are not able to conceive obviously, and eventually well success to each you and your husband, I comprehend it are not able to be convenient for you. Mike t.

SueM · Answer

That is really hard to read, so to be honest I didn't.

If there are children in possible danger, go get them, take them into your home. If you cannot do that, call child services or get another family member to help. If the children are not in danger, unfortunately there is not much you can or really should do. Your daughter is grown and needs to take responsibility for her own life. The father of the children has the right to raise his kids.

I am sorry that I have nothing better to say, but it sounds like you need to stay out of it UNLESS the kids are in danger. Stop trying to mother (read: control) a grown woman.

Good Luck!

Maries · Answer

I'm sorry, but there is nothing you can say to your daughter to make her see things your way.  She is correct - she is 27, and that's old enough to make her own decisions.  Just do as she asks and support her, and support those poor children.  A loving grandmother would go a long way toward helping them through this.  I really think spending time with the kids and showing them a lot of love and attention, and just being there to listen for your daughter, is the best you can do.  Trying to tell her what to do in her relationship is pointless - no one can do that.

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Very Serious answers please re: daughter 27?

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