Do you agree with these "Man Rules"?

Question

Found at http://www.irissilks.com/funcenter/jokes.asp

  The Man Rules
 
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, they're pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules"
From the female side.  
 Now here are the rules from the male side.    
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE! 
 
1.  Men are NOT mind readers.
1.  Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1.  Sunday sports:  It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides..
Let it be.
1.  Crying is blackmail.
1.  Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1.  Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1.  Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it..  That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1.  Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1.  If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1.  If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other one.
1.  You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1.  Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials....
1. Christopher Columbus
did NOT
need directions and neither do we.
1..  ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color.  Pumpkin is also a fruit.  We have no idea what mauve is.
1.  If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1.  If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1.  If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1.  When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1.  Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.
1.  You have enough clothes.
1.  You have too many shoes.
1.  I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
1.  Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that?  It's like camping.

Doris · Accepted Answer

I know I probably wont get any brownie points for this, but you know what who ever wrote that hit the nail on the head. I would venture to guess he has been married a while and knows what makes us tick. I had to laugh the whole time I was reading it.

? · Answer

LOL @ rules #1

My boyfriend says I don't have that many clothes and shoes. He's even bought me a dress once! Said it looked adorable on me. I'm so lucky xD


"If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one."

Took me some time to figure that one out :$ I stopped reading Cosmopolitan, that helped! Y'know all those articles about "what he really means" are just bogus, but I used to be insecure enough to believe them... How lame is that?! Caused a few arguments. 


I wouldn't make him sleep on the couch for this. These are pretty helpful. 

Although the toilet seat: Men need it down some of the time, too. Plus they CAN pee sitting down. And women have smaller bladders, so they need to go more often. When there are as much or more women in the house as/than men, it's least work on average to have it down. 
My brothers used to leave it down then pee standing up anyway. It was yucky.

Anonymous · Answer

The funny thing is that their title sounds like an affirmation which may be fairly common among GWS members... You know, "The Man Rules". Noun + verb.

And yeah, I agree with all the points.

sam · Answer

No. They're boring rules for boring people on how to live a boring life.

Edit

"They look like man rules for a stale, crusty relationship. When you into somebody all these don't apply."

This is one of the best and truest responses I have ever read in this section.

Anonymous · Answer

well to be honest I'm a guy & some of these rules don't apply to me.  I just want Feminists to stop being selfish & stop brainwashing other (clueless) women into thinking all men are the same because we really aren't.  I've known alot of guys who were anti-feminists & still respected women as the human beings they are.  Plus, I'm not into sports, I find them lame.  Other than that, I agree with most of these rules

Audrina · Answer

I like it.
I agree with most, but of course not all of them, as I am not a man.
But my favorite is the toilet seat one. I totally agree with that. The toilet seat up/down fight is one I never really got.
But I do think that if you pee on the seat, you should have to wipe it off. That shouldn't be my job.

Missy McGarry · Answer

lol very funny and well put...

I only have 1 rule for men...

1. Treat your lady like you would want your Mommy to be treated.

Markymark777 · Answer

I think i can say that I agree with at least 95% of these "Man Rules".

Thundercat · Answer

In terms of the internet, this is rather ancient.  Roughly equivalent to the middle ages in world history.

BTW...the international code of men is NEVER written down.  We can't allow it to fall into women's hands.

Anonymous · Answer

1 or 2 of these is a bit off, but for everything else, exactly right!

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Do you agree with these "Man Rules"?

19 Answers