Why don't adults do something to discipline kids?

Thanks! It's about time somebody stood up and said something. I'm 16 myself, and earlier today I was just talking about these kids. For example- back when I was in fourth grade, we would all turn red faced and get embarrassed if someone said a cuss word. I saw a group of fourth graders saying stuff that nearly offended ME! It's sad! I knew this one kid who was so spoiled that every time she fell over, she would lay down and bawl until someone picked her up. She was about 5 or 6- old enough to know better. As soon as her parents ran out to stand her up, she stopped crying and went about her business. There's also a fine line between abuse and spanking. I was abused. I do believe in spanking. I do see my mom doing some of the things she did to me to my niece, and it makes me sick. When she needs a spanking, she doesn't give her one, but she will freely beat her for ridiculous stuff. I usually try to stop her. There are tons of classes out there teaching about discipline- parents need to attend them.

First of all there is a huge big controversy in this country about spanking. Spanking is defined as A slap or a series of slaps on the buttocks. To slap on the buttocks with the open hand. This is defined in the Webster's Illustrated Dictionary. I can tell you from my own personal experience that my Father did spank me with the belt, on the buttocks. However, it was just that spanking. He didn't leave welts on me or bruises. He also didn't verbally abuse me. It was merely a form of discipline for when I lied to him or did things I wasn't obviously suppose to do. Looking back I don't have regrets that he used this form of discipline as he didn't do it in an abusive way. However, a lot of people believe in no spanking. Instead to use alternative discipline like time outs and the such. There is an absolute difference between spanking and abuse. You are describing abuse plain and simple. Please do not hit your parents back. This will only escalate the problem and it's telling your self it is also o.k. to be abusive. As it is never o.k. to be abusive. Get help immediately.

You did not grow up in the 90s, be a kid of the 90s you'd have to have been born in the early 90s, you were still in diapers until the 90s were almost over.

I think if you are a parent someday you'll learn that just punishing isn't the only answer to making a child behave.

I do not know if there is a real answer to that question on this forum, i am 47 now days i believe in corporal punishment, but some state laws like in the great state of California (not really that great in fact down right crappy state) Our kids are told by teachers in there schools if you parent hits you, spanks you thoughts you you can have child protective services called in and if they feel that you have abused your child then off to jail you go! I grew up with a father who made sure i was respectful to adults and respected the police others or the belt was ready for my behind! i Did not like being spanked but now days i really am glad he taught me right from wrong. have i always done right? no i have not, but you will not see me being upset at a police officer because i do something wrong and he corrects me with a ticket or what ever it may be. As American adults not all have but many have lost the art of leadership and demanding that our children give us and others respect, also as adults we are caught up in passing the responsibility of discipline our children to a failed education system and a overwhelmed court of law, and allowed liberals and so called do good-ers to dictate how we should raise our children under the disguise of self esteem etc. This is a problem, that starts at the top of our Government and goes all the way down to each adult and even and a certain age the child.

I have noticed moms wanting to be friends with kids, and are afraid of messing up the kid by teaching, correcting, spanking. Even God chastens, allows punishments through varuious ways, eventually at some point in lives. And to "spare the rod IS to spoil the child." However, I have seen parents spank kids, yell, but lack teaching, correction. This should NOT be. Putting the fear into the child is not the point, its to teach that consequence comes as a result of rebellion. Parents can relate to children, have fun, hug them & all that mushy junk..but, I noticed they do all the huggy junk at the wrong times, fearing they damage the child if they dont. God wants us to be wise, even God doesnt want to reveal rewards in your life, or answers to prayers, often, & great things to come, IF you are NOT on track, in purpose, on task, to the best of your ability- of which He knows when you are truely trying or not.. Parents are to DECERN- I notince many cant. They cant see when children are lieing, manipulating, they allow self to be bullied by kids, this makes a manipulator child even as an adult- no conscience. A parent is to teach that in Real Life consequences come, to no do so calls for the smae lessons to come, but only with BIGGER consequences, when you are older, cause..you should of recieved the lessons in the right season-when younger. The authorities are there to punish those who were once allowed to remain wild in their strong will, doing all they feel to do- without good reasoning, and this shames a family. As a parent my goal is to teach my children to think things through, be who they were created to be, and hopefully be a blessing not a curse to the world. I dont like how parents allow children to remain manipulators, and rationalizing thier error. Even the Bible says that "children come out of the womb speaking lies." - Since God knows each individuals purpose & its discovery is tied to knowing Him, and wisdom comes from Him, its wise for parents to get to Him. And after the child is grown, they can have direction, where heart break is not at the end thereof.

well, different people grow at different rates. when i was twelve, i looked and acted 18, according to just about everyone, including my sister, who i talk to about everything (meaning, she would know if i was immature). she always told me she would "forget" that i was only twelve, and that i wasn't allowed to do a lot of things with her. but when girls that age wear sluttty clothing...it's just ridiculous, i agree.

next topic...i don't agree with spanking, but i do agree that taking away someone's ipod is not very harsh. it just spoils them. i remember the other day, my guy friend was telling me about a conversation he overheard where the girls said something like, "yeah, my mom took my iphone away, so now i'm stuck with this piece of sh** droid." i didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

wait, is your sister 14 or 24? either way...uh she sounds...well, i think you know.

Kids need discipline that's for sure.

But kids are growing up the way they are not because nobody is whooping them.

But there are many 1 parent homes, and if that parent works the kids don't

get the proper guidance.

You can tell children who have SAHM as they are better behaved

You are right, parents don't discipline their children the way that they should. And it is resulting in a very terrible generation...or two, I've heard some bad statistics about people in their 20's. However, spanking is not necessarily the answer, it is basically a bad idea. That is one of the reasons that discipline fell apart. Authorities on the subject rightly suggested that people stop spanking, and so they did. But they never started doing something else in its place. It takes time and effort to properly raise a child and to learn a parenting method or develop your own...lots of people are to lazy to do that.

I think people are also:

afraid to make their kids mad at them

afraid that their kids won't like them

think they are doing a good thing if they give their kids lots of stuff

think it is a good thing if their child is spoiled and sassy

Then they raise a monster.

I don't think the problem is with discipline. In fact, I think discipline(harsh discipline) is the problem.

Okay, I don't agree with you on the spanking thing but I agree with the rest about how 12 year olds should not dress as 21 year olds.

I am 15, and I have never been beaten ever. My parents NEVER spank me and I am a decent student with near perfect grades, modest clothing and usually don't wear makeup and certainly not heavy make up. I also hang out with a similar group of friends whose idea of having fun is to go to the movies, read together at the library or go to each others house and play board games or go look around in the mall and buy some stuff. No clubbing, no partying, no drugs, drinks, or standing at street corners. And my parents never did confiscate my things. They talk to me and were really very careful with what I do, how I speak, who I hang out with. Ever since I was around seven, they have always taken the time to talk sense into me and never ban anything without telling me why. After a while I understood and they just have to occasionally tow me in line now.

Now, since I consider my parents quite successful in bringing me up. I'll tell you of people I know who have been spanked or caned. When I was younger, you can buy canes(bamboo canes) at the market near your house. Some parents carry canes(they became retractable canes later) in their bags. If this child were to drink ice cold water or fall down or secretly buy high heels, the parents would cane them. In primary school, comparing cane marks and scars is very common. And now that I am in high school, those who have been caned often ended up in those schools where most students cannot make it into college and drop out with criminal records. While most of my schoolmates now are usually not caned and my school has almost of whole cohort going to college.

What all the above is saying is that. Spanking, caning, other such "discipline" will not work. Parents need to spend time with their child, treat them like adults from young and teach them right from wrong. Spanking would cause kids to grow up hating their parents and this hate would manifest later on in life as family violence, depression and scars on the child's soul.

I hope you never have a child while you are in favor of spanking. Someone save your future child from your spanking. I really do hope you change your mind.

According to research, spanking doesn't work. Your sister doesn't need spanking. She needs consistency and firmness. However, even that won't do much because she sounds like a very typical 14 year old girl. She'll outgrow the worst of it in a few years. Adolescence isn't a nice age to live with.