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Over the years I have found it difficult to have an orgasm with women, why?

Just a little history for you, the first time I ever had an orgasm was with an Asian woman who did this manually and after a decent massage while I was in the army and 19 at the time. The whole time I was in Korea I never had a problem finishing what I started with Korean women. After leaving Korea, I was unable to finish what I started when I was with several other women and since Korea I have only been able to finish with one other woman who was dark skinned. She was a 9 but the sex was certainly a 10+! The woman I have been seeing over the past few months we finally made love and she is hispanic and dark skinned and very attractive physically, among other ways. What seems to be the problem with not being able to finish what was started with attractive women? Is there anything on the market that would help boost sensitivity for myself so I can finish off with a woman in the somewhat normal way? Any help would be appreciated. Thanks!

Update:

I am too much in love with the soft skin and the shape of a woman's body! I love woman and that is it. No gayness in my life, ever!

2 Answers

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  • Kim
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's going to sound really boring, but I'd suggest you talk to a sex therapist. This sounds like this is a psychological block. For whatever reason, you've started to feel like you won't be able to orgasm with these women, and that's preventing you from doing so. It's likely that you'll have to sit down with someone and talk through, step-by-step, what brings you to orgasm alone and what you feel might be hindering you when you're with your partner. If it's a matter of not receiving enough physical stimulation (some people just need more than others), then a good sex therapist may be able to suggest positions and other techniques which might work for you.

    There are some things that I've heard other men swear by. Some men really enjoy warming lubricants, and even ribbed or studded condoms. Plenty of men (yes, heterosexual men) enjoy anal stimulation. The anus is very sensitive, and stimulating the anus can stimulate the prostate... which brings on ejaculation. Some men find it too much, and a bit painful, and some men really really enjoy it. It helps to keep an open mind. If you try it and don't like it, then at least you know.

    You may also find that you enjoy having other areas of your body stimulated at the same time as you're having intercourse. Are your lips or nipples sensitive? Do you like someone playing with your balls? Often the techniques that you instinctively use in masturbation (nipple or scrotum play, grip strength, rubbing the glans, speed of strokes) will say a lot about how you like your sex. If you've had positive results with handjobs before (and if your partner is sensitive to your needs), then maybe suggest that she tries that as a starter. Give good, clear, positive instructions on what you like and what you don't. We're not psychic... and all men have different tastes, to tell the truth.

    :) Best of luck, and hopefully this is something that you and your partner will be able to work through together.

  • 1 decade ago

    r u gay?

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