Is this harsh? would you do this?

But the thing is this doesn't work for her kids....it works for her. Basically she sounds very lazy to me. Doesn't want to have to get a drink or a snack between set meals so she forces them to eat on schedule and eat when they aren't hungry. This could lead to major problems in the future with her kids eating even when they aren't hungry or dehydrating when they aren't getting enough to drink. She sounds like a real nut to me. As for what I would do...I would likely stop the play dates but thats just me. If she asked me why I would tell her I honestly think its very neglectful to deny a child a drink and I just feel we are too different in our parenting methods that I'd rather meet some moms more like myself. If she took it bad then oh well. I try to stick with moms who are similar to myself.

I can understand meal schedules or saying something like "a cup of water before bed but not after lights out" so that kids don't use "I want water" as an excuse to be out of bed all night. But throughout the day, I have no problem with a child requesting water whenever they are thirsty. Staying hydrated is crucial for overall health, and can actually help to make sure kids don't overeat. I also don't believe in making a child completely finish a meal if they're really full. As long as they eat enough of it to be getting good nutrition and won't be asking for a snack in 5 minutes, I don't think they need to force down every bite.

As for asking for food as a way of getting attention, I think that can be avoided without forbidding snacks. When I was a toddler, my mother emptied out a bottom cabinet shelf and a bottom self in the fridge. She stored small, single serving healthy snacks there like apple pieces and baggies of cheerios, and I was allowed to go and grab one myself if I was really hungry.

I'm all for schedules. They help the day go so much smoother.

But I can't see ever denying my daughter a drink when she is thirsty. It doesn't matter if it's 5 minutes after a meal or an hour after a meal, if she asks me for a drink, I get her a drink.

Same with meals, I feed her as much as she wants to eat. If she wants a second plate, she gets one. If she's full halfway through her first plate, I'm not going to force her to clean her plate off.

She has a good idea going with having a set schedule, but I do feel she is being too harsh with it.

I have a few friends who do scheduling, but this seems a little over the top. I think ROUTINE is good, but not strict schedules. I'm even going to go as far as saying that I think forcing your children to eat too much in one sitting, or not letting them eat because it's not a certain time is slightly abusive.

Maybe harsh, but... She might have had problems with her children not eating because they've drank milk etc during the day. And as far as nothing to drink while eating, we had the problem with my son for a long time that if he got food and drink at the same time he'd fill up on fluid and wouldn't touch his food. So we had to restrict drink during meals until her learned to balance the two.

I'd have to ask her if she is only thirsty at the same times everyday?

I'll bet they end up having some issues with food later in life. Probably other problems as well because if she's that controlling over food and drink, I'm sure she has some other freaky rules.

Sounds like someone who obsesses over food (not like the 50s at all....I actually was around back then, and nobody told me I couldnt drink when I was thirsty.)

Its one thing not to cater to fussy children. Its another to deprive a thirsty child of water because the clock hasnt chimed yet.

She has problems. Dont pay any attention to her.

I understand the mothers point but I definitely would not be so strict about it, from what I've heard her system does seem harsh. I would impose eating at designated meals but not let my children suffer or force them to eat.

my daughter will be 10 months on the 29th and i never had her on a schedule.

she eats when she wants, and drinks when she wants. i never force her to eat at a certain time, and when she is hungry i dont make her wait.

you cant help when you are hungry or thirsty.

it is harsh to force your child to eat and making them wait to eat at a certain time. but thats just my opinion. everyone else has different ways of raising their kids.

Sounds very extreme to me, especially with the drinking thing. If a kid is thirsty (especially if they've been playing), they need to be given water. And to make them eat their meals without anything to drink? She sounds like a frigid b*tch to me, I feel bad for those poor kids.