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Cheating while dating versus cheating while being married?

There are some people (both men and women) who say they will only be faithful once they are married. That cheating while you're only dating does not count because it (dating) is not a serious commitment like being married.

Would you keep your marriage if you discovered that while only dating your spouse cheated on you?

Would you accept the excuse that she / he only cheated on you because it was not a serious commitment like marriage?

Well, I would divorce right away if I discovered my husband cheated on me when we were only dating. Even if I had absolute certainty that he stopped when we got married.

Come on guys, do these people think we only get hurt when we are married or is it because they think that because you were ONLY a boyfriend/girlfriend you did not deserve their respect.

To me this is just another immature excuse from people who know what they did was wrong but try to rationalise the behaviour. What do you think?

14 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Well cheating is never a good thing no matter what kind of cheating it is. Dating some1 your having sex with for year' s & you keep have sex with that person.& if you date & have sex with some1 else as you keep having sex with the person you been dating for year's is cheating.No matter how you look at it ! It's cheating!! Cheating, Cheating, Cheating!! To me it a look into how that person is going to be when you get married to them! It's disrespectful to a man or a woman they have been having sex with before the other person popped into the picture & a dumb thing to do Cause people are more in danger of STD's also.Another thing both MEN & WOMEN CHEAT!! there isn't more on none of the side's.Anyone that say's different is just wrong! Because to make a cheating man or woman you need to have a man or woman on the other side making Him or Her CHEAT!! It's time people realize that woman cheat as much as men do.& stop pointing finger to just 1 side of it all ! Porn is 1 of the bigges thing's saleing & we see as much women as you there are men in it. Anyway Cheating is not ever any good cause even the 1 doing the cheating will pay for it in the end! But i'm sure that will never stop a cheater from doing the cheating Or make them realize just how bad & dumb they are making themself out to be later on in their life's. No 1 wants or cares about a person you can't trust & that's a fact.

    Source(s): Just realizing life are lessons that we all must learn from!
  • Lady
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Would you keep your marriage if you discovered that while only dating your spouse cheated on you? I'd be hurt for sure.

    Would you accept the excuse that she / he only cheated on you because it was not a serious commitment like marriage? No. If you're in a monogamous relationship that's a commitment too.

    To me this is just another immature excuse from people who know what they did was wrong but try to rationalize the behaviour. What do you think? I think you're right.

  • rac
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    What you are really saying is that you engage in sexual activities when you date. That makes the dating much more intimate and involves a much stronger commitment. When I was young, we dated without any intimacy. It was perfectly acceptable to go out with more than one girl at a time. I was dating five women when I met my future wife. Dating to me meant going out to eat, attending a movie or concert, going to a dance, sitting in each others living room and talking, going to church together and other safe activities. That is how you get to know each other, by doing various activities together. Thus, virtuous and chaste dating is acceptable to have more than one going at a time. Your intimate dating may not be viewed in the same way even though your boy friend obviously thinks it is the same. By the time I asked my wife to marry me, then all the other girl friends were pushed into the background and my wife was my only focus from then on.

    Source(s): Married 37 years and counting.
  • 1 decade ago

    Just because you are dating someone does not mean there is a commitment between the two. Any person who thinks that just because they are dating means that they are automatically faithful to each other is sorely mistaken.

    However, if there is a verbal or written agreement between the two to keep the relationship exclusive, that is when it is expected to be faithful.

    To limit ones lifetime experience because of some unwritten rule is an injustice to that individual. Remember, this goes for both boys/men and girls/women.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Cheating while dating.= Naughty. Uncomfortable.

    Cheating while married.= Nasty. Deceitful and bloody expensive.

    All cheats try to blame the innocent party. ("It's your fault I did it"). And they always seem to convince their partner that it's true. You might think I'm crazy, but I think adultery should be considered a criminal offence. It is in some countries.

  • 1 decade ago

    I completely agree..and I think since statistics show that men cheat more (because most mens' drives are higher) that we can assume that these men think that their women will forgive them easier than if the woman cheated on the man..but..what about the women who have equal higher drives..they aren't so forgiving lol!

  • 1 decade ago

    it depends on level of intimacy during dating. If it was first couple of months into dating, and he slept with someone, may be its not cheating. But if he slept with some one after going out without you for 3 years then it is cheating.

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  • Hannah
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    It matters because you married them not knowing. You would need to ask the question, if you two were getting married why didn't they tell you before hand..

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