Second Wedding...We Don't Want Gifts?

Dear one,

Congratulations and best wishes for your future together. You are SO wonderful for being altruistic in an age (and situation) of such greed.

OK. Usually I advocate that gifts are not required nor should they even be mentioned - anywhere - ever. There is an exception to every rule and your situation is the one and only time where I personally would put something in the invitation about gifts.

Try something like: "In lieu of gifts, John and Jane request that you make a contribution to either Org, Org, Org, Org, or a charity of your own choosing."

That's because, despite the fact that the organizations you have listed are excellent charities, your guests might wish to donate to a local homeless shelter, humane society, or other equally as fine a non-profit as these are. Please offer your guests the opportunity to gift as they choose.

Yes it is bad taste to ask people to donate to your charities, even by word of mouth. Donating is a personal choice, and should be done with ones own money. That means you donate with your money. If that money came to you as a gift from your wedding, you are free to donate how you see fit.

A recent question on here had your same idea and they supported an NGO which I have personally worked with, and frankly they are inefficient, they also discriminate. It's an organization that is well known all over the world, and they do good but I personally am not going to give to them anymore. So you see, different people have different causes and different Opinions. I do not solicit my friends or advertise my choices, I think it is in poor taste to do so.

Tell guests by word of mouth you don't want anything. If they bring a gift, be grateful. That's all you can do.

No it is not in bad taste to ask for donations made in your honor instead.

I would not register for any gifts (people might give you cash at the wedding) and put on the reception card 'In lieu of gifts please make a donation to your favorite charity (or list 3 charities you love) in our honor'

I once knew a couple and it was a 2nd wedding for both-They combined 2 households, and had 2 of lots of stuff..Solution-They held the Wedding Reception in their back yard, and invited everyone to the Yardsale! Food was Fingerfood, Punch and cake-and they even opened it to the public...everybody bought stuff..if this sounds like you...then donate the proceeds to whichever organization you want! They said the best memory was the public, who just happened in on the Yardsale/Reception, and got caught up in it all...

You are going to get (some) gifts no matter what. Some people don't feel right not bringing something.

I would create a wedding website (we used theknot.com) and under the registry section just put a little note and list the charities.

Well i would say just make a note at the bottom og the invitation regarding charity.

Definitely spread the word among your family & friends, and you are welcome to include this info on your wedding website, but I wouldn't go any further than that.

Expect that you will get some gifts, and appreciate those that are willing to make a donation as your gift.

As William and Kate just requested the same thing on the invitations for their wedding, you can be sure it was verified by Royal staff against etiquette standards in every country an invitation was sent to!

This is a beautiful idea.

Congratulations and Good Luck

If you do not want gifts it is perfectly ok to write "no gifts please" on your invites but it is not ok to ask people to donate because it is still asking for a gift no matter how you look at it.

i would actually put at the bottom of the invite that presents are not wanted but a donation to one of your chosen charities can be made if desired...then list the charities...it's nice to see someone think of others instead of the usual greed people show these days...good on you both and have a great wedding