Do you like my short story so far...?

This is chapter one.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AllNK...

This is the next bit.

What's the killer thinking as he drives the victim and two witnesses into the forest? What's the victim thinking? He believes he's going to get stoned. Afterwards he'll probably go home and watch some football. Then he'll have a **** and go to bed. He's not expecting to to end up with an axe in his skull.

What's his relationship with the killer? Does he like him? Probably not. Is he afraid of him? Most likely. But he thinks that if he doesn't cross the killer, he'll be alright. Wrong. The killer employed a common bullying tactic. He accused the victim of talking about him. You see it all the time. There's a clip on YouTube of this runty weasle of a kid bullying this older fat boy. He says: "You been talkin' **** about me" and the other one says: "I haven't been talking **** about you". Then he picks up the little kid and drops him. Literally drops him. You must have seen it, it's famous.

So bullies do this. They make up some story whereby the victim has somehow wronged them, and then they accuse him, or her. The victim denies it and is told to shut up! And stop lying! It's a stalemate. In this case, the killer tells the victim that the victim told everybody else that the killer stole from his mum's purse. The victim says: "I swear to God, I didn't tell anybody!" This was part of the plan. The killer stole the money, and deliberately told the victim.

I'm sorry, I have to give him a name. It's David Auchterlonie. I thought I would try to give him his privacy, but I'm denying him his humanity. The "victim" sounds too much like the "subject". A specimen, nothing more. But no, it's David. I know nothing about him, but this is what I see. A troubled soul. Something of a loner. You can imagine the nick-names in high school. Auchter- Lonely and so forth. He looks sad in the picture. Lost. Why isn't he wearing a shirt? It's difficult to make out the background but it seems to be outside, maybe at a beach. But it's not sunny, it's dull and miserable. So why take a photo? Is that just what you do at the beach? Maybe everybody was miserable.

I see something else in his face. I know it sounds crazy and I'm probably only bestowing characteristics that I see in myself, but his eyes have a wisdom. Like he's already seen a lot for a teenager. It's not a look you often see on the faces of people who are used to getting their own way in life. A look I often see. When they suddenly realise that somebody said no to them, they get all crestfallen. But this is different. David is used to people saying no. As I say, he was probably bullied at school. He's a loser. He's tall and skinny. He's got a dumb look on his face.

But David isn't wise. He wants to belong. He's a follower, and he follows Milat Jr. That's what I'll call him from now on, Milat Jr. David doesn't like Milat. He doesn't trust him. He's scared of him. He's scared of him because Milat's a big man. He's a Milat. So Dave follows him and he's in with the big men. I mean, it's a bit of excitement, right?