How did childbirth affect your marriage/sex life?

i waited till my wife said she was ready. This might sound odd since ive posted Qs here about my divorce issues but i will be honest. I was too busy with work and taking care of my daughter that i put it on the back burner. And i was worried because it might hurt her recovery. Mine had stitched from a epesiotomy?? Not a c-section. But still worried a lot. I dont know if helps but if it hurts you may have to be checked by Dr. I always believed good things come in time and patience...

I personally didn't really get back into the swing of things until after I weaned my daughter around a year old. We still did it sometimes during that first year, but I didn't feel like my old self or really have an appetite for it. I know some women who didn't really feel it for a couple of years.

Having a baby is a really huge F'n deal!!! I just saw my sister deliver a couple days ago and it's truly an unbelievable experience just to witness, let alone actually experience. On top of everything, while you are trying to recover from the shock of giving birth and waiting for your body to heal, you have to perform the most demanding job in the world 24/7. Taking care of a newborn can be soooo exhausting. I'm a gal who needs her sleep, so those first months I felt like a zombie all the time. I was so forgetful and slow!

It sounds to me like you are dealing with two babies! Your husband is being incredibly selfish. I don't know him, so I can't say if he possess some positive redeeming qualities, but I hope the attitude you have described only comes up concerning your sex life. Even still, it is beyond inappropriate. It's degrading and demoralizing for you at a time when you need more support than ever. He says he knows couples who revived their sex life in six weeks, but I wonder if he's heard it from the wives, or just from his bro's. I mean really, anyone who has not given birth themselves has no freaking clue what it's like!

Some women do have easier deliveries than others and pick up where they left off fairly quickly after giving birth, but I personally know more women with a delivery horror story than I know who wanted to get back in the saddle ASAP.

Becoming a new Mom can be overwhelming. It helps to make friends with other new moms. You can try doing Mommy and me classes, or even going to church if your'e into that. I know it's hard to be strong when you are more exhausted than you ever thought you could be, but I promise, you will feel better eventually. Until then, your husband really needs to back off and stop threatening you with his "roving eye." If he can't or won't back off, then I feel strongly that you should seek some help to get out of the situation. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you! If he can't see that you need time to heal and adjust, then he is not good for you or your baby. I'm so sorry and hope things improve.

Girl, listen ima tell you straight up! its sounds like to me that your giving a hundred and he's only given fifty and no relationship is gonna work like that. yeah guys need to have sex i get that so what? that's NOT juts what marriage is about, you get married because that persons your best friend nt just your soul mate, he may not understand you but he excepts you the way you are you can compromise, and it sounds like to me that somewhere along the way you lost that. Honey if your marriage Fails, it wont be because you didn't try and to me, it doesn't sound like it's failing, just-, but hey don't take that to heart, you cant be around some one like that that's just emotionally damaging to not only you but to your baby as well, look i don't care how you look, you are a PRIZE and you deserve someone to treat you like one. think about your first date or first time you had sex? is that Emotion still there, and i don't mean a little spark, **** that, i mean a roaring fire, and if its not you should tell him straight, leave )then come back) if he still doesn't change then leave for good, i know its scary but you have to do whats best for you and you baby as i said before if it doesn't work out, DO NOT think of it as your marriage has failed, maybe it will pass, but try leaving or shocking him and if it doesn't work, then it doesn't work follow your heart READ:Failing and Flying by Jack Gilbert Everyone forgets that Icarus also flew. It's the same when love comes to an end, or the marriage fails and people say they knew it was a mistake, that everybody said it would never work. That she was old enough to know better. But anything worth doing is worth doing badly. Like being there by that summer ocean on the other side of the island while love was fading out of her, the stars burning so extravagantly those nights that anyone could tell you they would never last. Every morning she was asleep in my bed like a visitation, the gentleness in her like antelope standing in the dawn mist. Each afternoon I watched her coming back through the hot stony field after swimming, the sea light behind her and the huge sky on the other side of that. Listened to her while we ate lunch. How can they say the marriage failed? Like the people who came back from Provence (when it was Provence) and said it was pretty but the food was greasy. I believe Icarus was not failing as he fell, but just coming to the end of his triumph

Sorry honey, I want to say this as gently as I can, but he seems to see you as a sex object and not his wife nor the mother of his child, nor a woman at all if he cannot accept that you are in too much pain to have sex after childbirth. It is six weeks minimum until you can have sex again after childbirth, if it takes longer than it is perfectly normal and okay (sometimes it can be three months or up to a year before you even feel comfortable with having sex). You do not have to have sex until you feel ready and are completely healed, you cannot expect to be up and running even after six weeks. He should have so much more respect for you as a person. He has even said that he would have preferred to lose his family and leave the relationship if he knew the sexual aspect of your relationship would become so strenuous. He has admitted to thinking about cheating on you just to satisfy his sexual urge.

I have been in the situation before where my partner was like a switch. He could be so understand and compassionate and seemed to completely understand. The next he was a cold, heartless jerk and I just couldn't understand how he could treat me like that again. Of course, when he was loving and sweet again, I couldn't believe that the cold side had come out at all or even existed. As much as I liked to pretend he wasn't a cruel person, I could no longer deal with the emotional backlash of him being nice and then being so undeniably horrible. It was definitely doing my head in.

I would strongly advise that you move on and find someone who is willing to respect you and who is willing to accept that you are not in control of your body's rate of healing and who is able to control themselves. I know it may seem like maybe there is no one out there like that, and you feel like crying when you think you'll never meet a man like your husband when you think of his good side, but the fact is that he IS sexually abusing you to an extent whether you feel comfortable admitting it or not. You cannot please him and he is definitely only thinking of himself when you have been through quite an ordeal through childbirth. Please, don't let yourself be used by this man. He is not even worth calling a man if he cannot respect you as a woman. Please think of yourself for once and not about making sure he is happy above all else. If your relationship can't work at the worst of times, how can it be a healthy strong one with which you will raise your beautiful new baby?

My husband did not have sex with me after the baby for about 8 weeks and we did other stuff but as far he did respect me and your man is not and sorry but it sounds like you have post portum depression and should seek help both of you if you don't want to get a divorce soon. Good luck and what he is doing is called rape while ur sleeping. Very sorry. Get help soon.

I don't have children, but my best friend just had a baby and she was back to normal within weeks. She gies to the gym, her boyfriend and her make love, the sleeping part is messed up, but once the baby's fed every three hours they go back to sleep and just manage fine

your husband is an immature 17 year old.

*focus on the bigger issue, your healing and the infants nutritional/emotional needs.

your husband is nothing but a *greedy coward.

sounds like u guys got married way to young, if any of what u said was true then u need to get out of this relationship