What to do with my sons father..?

I'm 22 years old, and he is 24.. He cheated on me when I was 8 months pregnant and left me for the woman he cheated on me with. My son is now 3 and a half and his father took me to court about 8 months ago.. WITHOUT TELLING ME. It scared the **** out of me because I pretty much breast fed and cooked and cleaned and did almost everything alone especially when he was a baby.. He was never a bad father so I am not here to bad mouth him.. But he scared me and got a lawyer in court.. I represented myself.. I live alone, I'm on assistance and he works and has a house with his girlfriend. His lawyer told me that it is the best interest of the child if he goes with him.. and he lied onthe court papers and said everything that was FALSE Exept for ONE thing that was true. He put my son in daycare without my permission and it looked good on him in the courts, he is now living with his father full time and i get him on the weekends or every other weekend. The woman that he is cheated on me with.. OUR SON CALLS HIM MOMMA... I told him as a father it is wrong of him to accept OUR child to do that and he said I shouldnt worry because our son is smart and that he knows I am his REAL actual mother so IT DOESN'T MATTER. I snapped I think he is BEYOND disrespecting me and it's been 3 1/2 years I been taking his crap because I am NOT a bad mother. He even put our son in Soccer Without my consent or Sharing ANYTHING with me. Before he took me to court he was paying child support and stopped and I never asked him for a cent.. instead I aked him for groceries THREE TIMES and he refused.. only one time he gave me 50 dollars to get groceries. I think he did this so he wouldn't have to pay child support and wouldn't have to be worried. I never did ANYTHING to him I don't get why he is making my life a living hell.. I want EQUAL rights.. I am the mother and I always share things with him when I have our son. sometimes when it is my time to have the weekends he will say he has work at 5 in the morning or says our son has a birthday party to go to or SOME SORT OF STORY just so he can miss the weekends with me.. And when I threaten him to bring him to court to solve this mystery he says oh well you miss A LOT OF weekends with OUR son and it would be HIS FAULT because he always comes up with some sort of story. (I have my mother as a witness).. Anyway my son is with me now and he will be coming for him tomorrow morning.. I wish I can just not have to open the door but he threatens that he is the REAL parent just because of the papers.. he is taking advantage and Little do the COURTS Know that he is manipulating and a HUGE liar and a bad father.. because what father keeps a child away from his mother and causes his own child to call his GIRLFRIEND momma it's wrong.. and I don't know how to go about this. And the only reason he won in court is because he got his lawyer to scare me and I agreed to weekends.. and I now REGRET this.. Please help me.. I'm at my wits end.. He can't even cook.. my poor child is always asking me for cookies and hot dogs and I am big on Organic eating and a healthy meal plan.. My son SHOULD be with ME FULL TIME and with his father for the weekend... His father works FULL TIME AND GOES TO SCHOOL. I work at home.. There is no reason for this.. and he put a television in our 3 year olds room at HIS house..and he spoils him with toys so much that sometimes my son says mommy i want to go to daddys house because i want to play with my toys... He has LOTS of toys here but "Better" toys at his fathers house appearently.. He is teaching our child to be materialistic and causing him to be used to not being with me... I sometimes feel not important although I do know my son loves me very much... But this is all wrong and I don't know what to do to change it...?!?!?!?!