should i have more children? im really scared?

I think it's really common for women who have just had a baby to start thinking about the next. It's like, once the baby's born, for a while something is missing inside. Even though you're over the moon that you have your new baby, being pregnant is special and it just suddenly stops which is hard to adjust to. I felt like this after both my boys and many of my friends have felt the same. Of course I may be wrong but I think it's a natural thing to start worrying about the next so soon and I reckon it will suddenly not be such a concern in a few weeks time. I guess I'm trying to say, don't start planning and over thinking the next baby just yet. Try to enjoy this one a little more and in 2 years, if the times right, then go ahead and try again. Although we all have ideas about how many children we'd like, it doesn't always go to plan. And at 38 (not too old btw) you are actually more likely to have un-identical twins than a younger Mum, so you could end up with 4!

Congratulations on the birth of your son. I think I saw your questions on here quite a bit leading up to his birth. I'm glad he arrived safely.

Forst of all, where the heck are you giving birth that they are not able to provide you with a appropriate care during labor and delivery.That is crazy. Second of all, only you can decide for sure if you are willing to try again. If you though, I would NOT use the same doctor or hospital that caused you all that trauma.

Just to add, I am 37 now pregnant with my third (we waited five years between 2 and 3) and will be 38 at delivery. I have not had any increase in discomfort or any medical issues with this pregnancy due to age.

You just had your baby, hon. The memory of the pain is still way too fresh for you to be able to think this one through right now. I remember after my third daughter was born I absolutely did NOT want to go through labor ever again, but as the months past I knew I wanted one more child. However, the memory of the pain is still there, nagging at me. I'm now 13 weeks with our last child.

I don't know if there are any other hospitals you can go to? That's what I'm choosing this time. I had the same hospital for three of my labors, but with my second they messed up on the epidural, and on the first and third the nurse (different one for each) was so rude and controlling. On my third one she wouldn't even let me get up to go to the bathroom and insisted on putting a catheter in. So this time I'm driving 45 minutes to go see a doctor in the next closest town with a hospital, and so far I'm really like them and the hospital is really nice. I've had a few friends go to this hospital to have their babies and they all loved their experiences.

I know this may not be an option, but have the two of you considered adoption through the foster system? There are a lot of young children who need loving homes who have been completely given up or taken away from their parents. Just a thought.

Good luck, hon. Give yourself more time, and if you're still that scared I'd say no, don't do it.

Hi Honey

Thats great that u hav been with ur husband for that long, its so nice. But having more kids is something u both need to sit down and think and chat about, ur body might not be able to take it so i dont think its a good idea but why dont u adopt. Ther ar loads of unwanted and uncared for kids in this world u can adopt one of them, again its ur choice.

The next labor is always easier than the previous. And think about it? once the baby is out are you even thinking of that pain anymore?

My mom had my youngest sibling when she was 40. She said it was her hardest pregnancy ever. She had a delicate pregnancy, and would often have to be in bed for a long period of time. She also got diabetes during her pregnancy. My mom went to hospital when she was 6 centimetres dilated. She didn't even know she was in labor, and when she was finally able to push, my brother came out in one push. Haha.

It is really up to you . It's you that has to go through with everything. But to be honest if you are diabetic and you will be 38 there is high chance you will miss carry or risk still birth or even your child could have a disability. You should talk to someone at your local family planning centre and talk about all the risks and benefits :)

Go for it, chances are this will be your easiest labor and delivery yet. The pain will fade in your memory.

Maybe you should adopt, if it was that hard on your body aren't you afraid something will happen to you? Then your son won't have a mother!