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Why was my husband aggressive with no provoking and no history of aggression?

Late one evening whilst in bed my husband and I were cuddling and talking ... Relaxing. I at some point rolled over as I was falling asleep next thing he pushed me forcefully out the bed I landed heavy on the floor to my surprise and shock. I stood up and asked him why, his reply was that I was selfish. Confused and not wanting to argue I preceded to leave the room, just as I was out the door he grabbed me and held me by the throat telling me I deserve everything u got and I was selfish I was not prepared to argue I felt physically sick, confused and extremely upset. He went quiet and left the room and slept elsewhere in the morning he had little memory of this but since that evening he has sudden mood changes, I walk off try to ignore him but its really worrying me.

He is 50 yrs old, no history of violence.

What do I do? Why is he being like this?

5 Answers

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  • Jade M
    Lv 6
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    He should seek medical attention. The fact that he does not remember his behavior indicates that it is not intentional. Maybe he has a medical problem that is triggering these out bursts.

  • B
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    It could be a physical thing and if it is it will not get better so ignoring it is the worst thing you can do. Has he hit his head recently? A concussion can make a person act aggressively.

    The other option is that he has turned into a b@stard and you have to nip this behavior right away or it will get worse and fast.

    I get that you did not expect it the first time and didn't really know how to react, wow that had to be quite a shock, but now you have to react to his aggressive behavior. I would not wait for it to happen again I would tell him you will not tolerate it any longer and he either needs to see a doctor or stop the aggressiveness immediately. If he touches you again it's time to call the police and if he is a bit passive aggressive you call him out on it as soon as he does it.

  • 8 years ago

    My husband is 49 this year, no history of violence (married 13 years) and did some similar things. I had to leave. The problem may be mental instability, or progressive vascular dementia or something. He gave me a concussion in the summer. He promised up and down and in writing and to never do it again. And yet he has been physically intimidating a few time since then. I do not think he has control of himself.

    My problem is that now that I know his is unstable and the violence came out suddenly...I have been afraid all the time. I stopped bringing up any touchy subjects. I avoid coming home. The constant fear was unbearable. You just cannot conduct a homelife afraid all the time.

  • D B
    Lv 6
    8 years ago

    You have not said how long you have been together.

    If this is fairly new then he could just have hidden his violent streak very well.

    If you have been together for several years then make an appoint ment for him to see his doctor and insist on going with him to expalin what happened. in the meantime I suggest you sleep in another room with a very strong lock on the door.

    Do not ignore what has happened or pretend that it has not as things will only get worse.

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    I'd both go to the Doctors and try to get the Doctors opinion on it. It could result to more serious violence. Last thing you want, is your husband being in un-control and seriously hurting you, or others around you. If you're THAT worried about your safety, I'd tell the Police/Doctors, or tell him to move out until he sorts himself out.

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