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Did his preschool director overreact?

Our preschool pulled us aside and told us, very worried-like, that our boy has been saying "I'm going to cut your head off" to a few of his friends at school. We've heard him say it before at home and we always just ignored it. He most likely picked it up from a neighborhood boy.

I fell the school overreacted a bit however my work colleagues think with Newtown and all no one can be too careful and the school was right to pull me aside and discuss it.

I just keep thinking, he's 4. It's not like he's acted agressive in any way or been a problem at all at the school. So why so much concern about a 4 year old playing with his words?

Don't all little boys say aggressive stuff at one time or another? Isn't it part of their play?

Thoughts?

Update:

We did talk to him - explaining that it scares people and isn't nice. He said he wouldn't say it anymore. I am sure b/c he's my kid, I KNOW it is all just in play and a silly, stupid thing he picked up somewhere and repeated it. Maybe that's why I think it was an overreaction. Don't most boys run around saying "i'm going to shoot you!" at some point? So I wonder how is this any different really?

Thanks.

8 Answers

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  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I can understand the director pulling you aside. My son is 3, so he's not as verbal with his words as your 4 year old is. But, as a parent though I wouldn't be comfortable with him telling his friends at school that "I'm going to cut your head off", it seems really violent to me and even though he's only 4 and would never act on it, it's not a nice thing to say to a friend anyways. I don't think the director is overreacting. It's possible that one of your child's friends possibly could've gone home and told their parents and one of their parents may have asked the director to speak with you. That's usually what happens!

  • 8 years ago

    I don't think its too odd that your son said that, but just understand the school has to be safe than sorry.

    My two year old cousin say things like "I'm gonna punch you inn the head".

    I would just tell your son that cutting peoples heads off is bad and if you do it you'll get in trouble. This way he can get scared of being in trouble and stop mentioning it.

    Terrible that we live in a society where kida cant be kids and say crazy stuff without being monitored and questioned :/ not the schools fault though. All these damn kids killing nowadays!

  • 8 years ago

    How is taking you aside and mentioning it to you overreacting? Of course it's something that warrants a discussion, he threatened kids. It's not like the school expelled him over it, you said all they did was pull you aside and tell you about it.

    No, it's not a sign he's going to be an axe murderer or that he's overly aggressive. I will say so that with my three boys, not a single one of them have ever threatened to cut off someone's head nor has anyone said that to them. Or anything like it. It's not something ALL boys do, nor it is cause for immediate therapy or anything. But of course it's something that a preschool should tell the parent.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    you're fortunate they have a city preschool. anyhow, I went to a Christian preschool. they did not push Christianity all that a lot really. My concepts of it consist specifically of rolling round contained in the tires they'd for us to play with and sitting in a circle making a music and stuff. this is really no longer a huge deal. in case you do not placed them in a Christian kindergarten and hardship-free college, they're no longer going to be round Christianity that lengthy anyhow. For the jiffy that your youngster may ask about Christianity, that can provide an chance to demonstrate your newborn to keep an open concepts. this is unlike Christianity is all undesirable. The morals conform to what a civilized society expects. if you're the shape that thinks you ought to be able to drink, do drugs, and screw whoever or in spite of you want, nicely, possibly that preschool's no longer any such solid idea.

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  • Ellen
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    No, "most" boys don't go around telling people that they are going to shoot them or do other violent acts, and it is not an over reaction. It is the school's responsibility to not only keep all the children safe, but to also let you know when your child does (or says) something that is of concern.

    Source(s): hospital IBCLC and mothers' group leader 20+ years mom to 3 former pre school teachers
  • 8 years ago

    Telling you what your son said at preschool is in no way over-reacting. They are simply relaying information, it's part of their job.

    I would be somewhat concerned if my child said that, and I would be very quick to explain that we don't talk like that. You could also explain, in simple terms, what that actually means, because your son likely doesn't even know what it means. Something along the lines of "That means you are going to really hurt someone and they will die. We don't talk like that." End of story.

    While I get that "boys can be aggressive" it doesn't mean that speaking like that is acceptable.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    That does seem "normal" to exhibit some male aggression But unusually violent. Talk to your kid and ask him o say stuff like " I'll put your lights out" on" you don't want to mess with me" and to avoid threats I'd dismemberment

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    The school was right- so be careful....,...!

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