DeeGee

We know a couple who has a 7-year old son who acts like a 3 or 4 year old. He throws fits when he doesn't get what he wants, screams and cries, acts like the world is ending. And most of the time it is because his mom didn't toast his bread or forgot to put cheese on his sandwich. She makes excuses all the time that he's "sensitive and has strong emotions" but we have recently found out that not only does he go to the principals office regulalry at school, but that he also has a reputation in the neighborhood for his fits. Most recently we have started making excuses not to hang out with them because of how inappropriate his fits are and how terribly the parents handle them (coddling and giving in). We also notice our son starts to act out more after we've spent some time with them, so we don't like that influce either. We really like them, but don't like their son. Is there anything we can do? I feel like I can't really say anything even though I think they have basically let him become the king of the household and will be a disaster in a few years. I don't want to end the friendship, but I also don't like being around them when he's such a brat. Any suggestions?

We know a couple who has a 7-year old son who acts like a 3 or 4 year old. He throws fits when he doesn't get what he wants, screams and cries, acts like the world is ending. And most of the time it is because his mom didn't toast his bread or forgot to put cheese on his sandwich. She makes excuses all the time that he's "sensitive and has strong emotions" but we have recently found out that not only does he go to the principals office regulalry at school, but that he also has a reputation in the neighborhood for his fits. Most recently we have started making excuses not to hang out with them because of how inappropriate his fits are and how terribly the parents handle them (coddling and giving in). We also notice our son starts to act out more after we've spent some time with them, so we don't like that influce either. We really like them, but don't like their son. Is there anything we can do? I feel like I can't really say anything even though I think they have basically let him become the king of the household and will be a disaster in a few years. I don't want to end the friendship, but I also don't like being around them when he's such a brat. Any suggestions?

I am being charged 1% by the financial advisor and then another .88 on the two different mutual fund accounts I have set up - for a total of 1.88% fee. Is that reasonable?

Also, he has set me up with a Roth IRA and each time I put money into the account I am charged a 4.75% fee. I am putting $5500/year in so getting charged 4.75 each time I put that in (no fees otherwise). Is that reasonable?

I am new to all this. The advisor has been great explaining the market and such to me and how to set myself up financially, but I'm just wondering if I'm paying too much in fees. I hear that can be the one contributor to someone not making much on their money in the market.

Thanks!

The other night we were talking about finances and my husband said "well when we get the inheritance from your dad, we should probably use it to pay off the house". I said, "oh, you just assume the inheritance is yours too? It's actually my inheritance". Admittedly, it probably came out wrong, but I was taken aback that my husband assumed the inheritance would be "ours". Is that wrong of me? We ended up in a big argument about it.

My position is that my father has been my relative - my dad for 43 years. When he dies he is leaving money to me - not to us - to me. That does not mean that I won't share it. But really, the money is mine, not ours. I can choose to do with it whatever I want, right? I know legally I can keep it all myself. That's not really the point. I guess what I want to know is am I totally off base here telling him he shouldn't assume my inheritance is his?

We had our son in a regular daycare from 3 months to nearly 4 years. Right before he turned 4, we switched him to a montessori school we had heard wonders about and knew it was time for him to move up to something more challenging and structured. He seemed to be doing fine for about 4 months, but within the past month we have been made aware of a lot of issues going on at the school.

We have met with the guides and with the director and are working on this as a team, however yesterday I went and did a class observation and saw some things that made me wonder if this is the correct school for him (too much working alone, not enough outdoor play, discipline is too mild, no deep connection between him and the guides).

Has anyone had the experience that montessori, as wonderful as so many say it is, turned out to NOT be the correct fit for your child?

One thing that really stood out is another child was crying for over 10 minutes and not one guide came over to him and tried to comfort him. They just ignored him. I believe this is the idea that "bad" behavior should be ignored, but really? Crying?

I'd appreciate any insight to others experiences with montessori. And yes, I know a lot about the philosophy, I just don't know if it is right for my son.

Thanks!

We had our son in a regular daycare from 3 months to nearly 4 years. Right before he turned 4, we switched him to a montessori school we had heard wonders about and knew it was time for him to move up to something more challenging and structured. He seemed to be doing fine for about 4 months, but within the past month we have been made aware of a lot of issues going on at the school.

We have met with the guides and with the director and are working on this as a team, however yesterday I went and did a class observation and saw some things that made me wonder if this is the correct school for him (too much working alone, not enough outdoor play, discipline is too mild, no deep connection between him and the guides).

Has anyone had the experience that montessori, as wonderful as so many say it is, turned out to NOT be the correct fit for your child?

One thing that really stood out is another child was crying for over 10 minutes and not one guide came over to him and tried to comfort him. They just ignored him. I believe this is the idea that "bad" behavior should be ignored, but really? Crying?

I'd appreciate any insight to others experiences with montessori. And yes, I know a lot about the philosophy, I just don't know if it is right for my son.

Thanks!

Our preschool pulled us aside and told us, very worried-like, that our boy has been saying "I'm going to cut your head off" to a few of his friends at school. We've heard him say it before at home and we always just ignored it. He most likely picked it up from a neighborhood boy.

I fell the school overreacted a bit however my work colleagues think with Newtown and all no one can be too careful and the school was right to pull me aside and discuss it.

I just keep thinking, he's 4. It's not like he's acted agressive in any way or been a problem at all at the school. So why so much concern about a 4 year old playing with his words?

Don't all little boys say aggressive stuff at one time or another? Isn't it part of their play?

Thoughts?

Leaving for Berlin from NWR tomorrow. Anyone know which terminal it will be?

We are flying to Germany via Newark and have a long layover. I'd love to hop into Manhattan because my husband has never been there and I've only been once many years ago. But is it worth it? If so, what should we do? We will have our 3 1/2 year old with us, too.

yet there are hundreds of thousands of children out there in the foster care system due to neglect and abuse? There are hundreds of thousands of children (not fetuses, not embryos) real children, waiting to be adopted and taken care of.

But some pro-lifers are so fanatic about their beliefs that they put all their energy and effort into forcing moms to have babies they don't want?

Wouldn't their time and energy be much better used helping neglected and abused children? Aren't those the real kids suffering and deserving a chance at life? A good life?

I was cleaning the kitchen this evening while my husband was putting our son to bed and I started thinking how we have always traded off - one puts the kid to bed while the other cleans up after dinner. My husband also does all the laundry and cooks sometimes. I do probably 75% of household chores, but I can't imagine doing 100% and working 40 hours a week like I do.

Does anyone here do that and if so, are you happy?

Our little boy is potty trained when it comes to number 1, but he refuses to go number 2 in the toilet. He only wears diapers at nighttime and poops in his underwear almost every day.

We have not been scolding him at all and just talk to him about it. Tell him he'll get a piece of candy if he goes in the potty, and he knows this, says this but just doesn't do it. Even the daycare is wondering what's up.

Any ideas? He'll be 3 in November and has been potty trained with pee pee for over a month.

Is it rude to reply on an Evite that you are coming to the party and "Hope you don't mind I'm bringing a friend" in the comments section?

Is this rude because I didn't personally call or contact the host first? Or is it normal practice to ask to bring a friend in the evite comments section?

Am I wrong to think that's what the comments section of an evite is for?

Every year we seem to have more and more incidences of parents forgetting their children in hot cars. For the past 2 years, we have had at least 3 occurrances just in our area, and over 10 in our state. Just yesterday it happened again with a 6 month old left for 9 hours in a hot car. Of course, she died.

I'm not judging the parents, but I just wonder, why do you think this is on the rise? Are parents too busy, multi-tasking, not putting their kids first?

What's your opinion?

I got a positive pregnancy test at my doctor's office this morning but have been having bleeding for 3 weeks on and off (that's why I went in). I am probably about 6 or 7 weeks along and they are doing Hcg testing to see if the pregnancy is viable. I won't know much more till Friday or even next week.

My question is, has anyone here had moderate bleeding for an extended period and still gone on to have a viable pregnancy?

I don't need to hear the stories about those that ended in miscarriage because I know that is most likely going to be the outcome here (I had the exact same thing happen 5 years ago). But i would love to hear if there are women who had my situation and still went on to have a healthy pregnancy and baby!

I got a positive pregnancy test at my doctor's office this morning but have been having bleeding for 3 weeks on and off (that's why I went in). I am probably about 6 or 7 weeks along and they are doing Hcg testing to see if the pregnancy is viable. I won't know much more till Friday or even next week.

My question is, has anyone here had moderate bleeding for an extended period and still gone on to have a viable pregnancy?

I don't need to hear the stories about those that ended in miscarriage because I know that is most likely going to be the outcome here (I had the exact same thing happen 5 years ago). But i would love to hear if there are women who had my situation and still went on to have a healthy pregnancy and baby!

Thanks!

and his wife are just plain racist?

Do you sometimes find yourself wavering on your values because of other families you are in contact with?

Most recently a neighbor invited us to a birthday party with a petting zoo. We have RSVPd no because we don't feel it is ethical to use animals as entertainment, especially those small gigs that don't treat the animals well at all and are just trying to make a buck. I know we will be the only family in the neighborhood not going, but we feel our personal ethics and values are more important than attending this party.

Have you ever had a similar situation?

I never thought I'd be the one asking about sleep issues, but here I am. My son (2) has always been a good sleeper, and easy to put to bed. For nearly 2 months now, he screams when we leave the room after putting him to bed (we spend a good 10 to 20 minutes, getting him settled beforehand). Then he wakes once or twice in the night, also screaming, calling for us. Then between 5:20 and 5:40 he wakes screaming EVERY morning. He will not go back to sleep after that.

We have tried so many different things from cuddling with him, patting him, , bringing him to our bed, leaving him to cry it out, etc. and nothing has worked longterm. This has been going on for nearly 2 months and I am at my wits end.

I am sleep deprived and stressed out about it. My husband and I have started fighting and the whole house just seems to be in upheaval right now. It would be one thing to have one of these sleep issues, but it's three difficulties were having. We put a screaming kid to bed, wake in the night to a screaming kid and wake up in the morning to a screaming kid.

He is not teething, not sick, and is a very happy boy during the day.

Anyone had this issue or have any ideas?